Does anyone find HS groups to be more harm then good?

[Kate in VA]

I joined a new group that was beginning to form in my area this year. I am now running 3 different things that go on monthly....I know to some this might seem like not alot but every time a turn around there is something new being added.... We have only 1 car so just getting to an event is a challenge. I feel like i am constently being micro-managed and that we aren't getting much from it.... (beside myself getting a head ache) ..

Most of the group (that I have seen) are unschoolers so I'm not sure if they have alot of planning of their own but I am working on my own plans for next year, daily school work, working around my dh's schedule to be able for us to see him, my mother is not doing well (so that is on my mind), we are having financial issues at the moment, etc.

Maybe I just can't balance well (not sure) but does anyone else opt out of the whole HS group thing?
Sorry for the vent... I am just frustrated and lost right now :eek:
Kate

[Closeacademy]

I have found that a group can be a great place to meet and develop a supportive circle of friends but a lot of times there are a lot of people you don't mesh well with that you have to deal with until you find your support network.

Hang in there. It has taken me about five years to find a good group of other homeschooling moms. We support each other in a positive way and even though our teaching styles are radically different we all learn from each other.:)

[8FillTheHeart]

Are you talking about a co-op or a general support group? I absolutely do not get involved in co-ops. I guess my expecations/standards are too high.....so what effort I put in, others don't do justice to (as in the kids don't do their homework, etc) and what my kids get out of it are sub-par to what I would expect personally.

I do like to get together with other moms and socialize. Park days, going out to eat, fun occassional get togethers (like roller-skating once in a while).......those I enjoy and so do my kids.

[Old Dominion Heather]

But that has a great deal to do with my personality, I guess. The ones I checked into when I first started homeschooling were just queen bees and the drones. Total waste of an afternoon evening.

Now my kids do take art at a co-op, and that has been a better experience.

I made a resolution a few years ago never to attend any more meetings for any reason for any organization. So far, I have stuck to it and it is wonderful!

[Ellie]

I had to make a rule for myself:

One park day a month (there were a couple of groups whose park days we attended).

Field trips only on my field trip day (Thursday) or if the event is so spectacular that I can't turn it down, or it needs a group to get the good price (such as Sea World). Even then, I have to rilly, rilly think about it.

Is there just *one* regular activity you can attend, like a park day? Or are there any families that you feel a special connection to whom you could invite over for lunch and *not* do the other activities? Or could you plan *one* field trip and invite the people to go with you that you think you'd enjoy being with?

[Frontier Mom]

I was a member but I, like you, found them adding more and more things to do. Since I didn't really agree with the educational value and I didn't need something else to do, I dropped out of my group last year. I can honestly tell you I haven't missed a thing.

The group I was in went to Co-op which I wasn't interested in. Classes were not really educationally beneficial and the leadership was questionable. It was also on my dh's day off, Friday, so we just didn't attend. When I was constantly questioned about why I wasn't supporting the "group", I decided it wasn't for me.

During the year, we started a homeschool basketball team which drew from several different areas and groups. We also participate in a strong 4-H group monthly that I lead and was intentional to NOT tie it specifically to one support group. These activities, along with our church, sports and neighborhood, provide my family with plenty of "support."

This said, some in our group desired more "classroom-type" settings. Since that wasn't important to me at all, I just decided it was time to leave. I just did so quietly and have found another more like-minded group I plan to join next year.