Writing help...I simply cannot be objective re: dd11's writing...

[Sue G in PA]

Her writing frustrates me. She's in 6th grade and her writing, IMO, is atrocious. Part of it is she doesn't care about doing a good job. To give her a little credit, I must say her writing has improved a tad bit since last year. A little. She's using IEW's Anc. Hist. Based Writing Lessons and her use of adj., more complex sentences, adverbs, etc. has really improved. But, it's still sloppy (and I don't mean handwriting...I mean content). Her latest assignment, to write a keyword outline about Pyramids using a 3 paragraph selection given in the book. She had to choose which details to include and she did a good job. Then came the rough draft. Instead of putting together an organized paragraph that flowed from one idea to the next, it looked like she just "threw up" facts on her paper with no rhyme or reason. I honestly tried to be positive. I praised her for her good work (those aspects that were good) and then pointed out how disorganized her paragraph was and helped her reorganize it. She went off to re-write it and the revised copy was worse than the first (sentence fragments, no adjectives, etc.)! I specifically told her that her original sentences were good, she just needed to re-organize them so the paragraph flowed better! HELP! I just handed it back to her and said I couldn't be objective right now...I was too frustrated. I simply cannot be objective with this...her writing just makes me cringe. I'm thinking dh can take over this part of her studies...perhaps he can be more objective and less frustrated. Any other ideas to help me be more positive about her work while pointing out the "error of her ways"?

[MIch elle]

if he can help her in a positive way. Then continue with her after you cool down and realize that she's ONLY in gr. 6. Accept where she's at and help her to improve. Give yourself some grace and her too. Baby steps- slow and steady and you'll get there!

Blessings,

[ABQmom]

This is just a guess from what you've said, but maybe she is frustrated too? What I'm thinking is that maybe she didn't really understand what you wanted her to do, so she got more sloppy with it out of her own frustrations. You might need to walk her through the changes you want her to make.

Another thought: My dd often gets frustrated with having to "redo" because she has to write the whole thing over. If I say, "You need to rewrite this, but you can do that tomorrow.", then she does much better because she doesn't have to think about it anymore for that day, and she's in a fresh frame of mind the next day.

[Rhondabee]

It *is* very easy to look at their papers and see all the work you as the teacher still have cut out for you!!!

So, I put their papers aside and don't look at them until dh is home. We go over them together, and he helps me see the good.

I've heard in grading writing it is best to just criticize *one* thing per paper. Maybe what you could do in a case of a paper that isn't well organized is copy the sentences onto index cards (or make a xerox copy and cut it up). Then, you and dd could sit down the next day and re-arrange to your hearts' content. Then, the next day, she could re-copy the "new and improved" paragraphs.

I do know it's hard - that's why I'm hiding out here!
;)

[Carol in Cal.]

If what you are after is mostly rearrangement, it is so easy to do it in Word!

Just make a copy with another name, and separate the sentences, and start cutting and pasting them and moving them around.

If not, I would make a photocopy of her writing and cut the sentences apart, and then move the order around and read it aloud each time.

I found with DD that this really got her over that particular revising hump. (There were MANY revising humps; this was one of the few that was relatively easy to overcome.)

[Narrow Gate Academy]

I would try doing a different type of outline with her. Rather than doing a key word outline, try a more standard outline so that she can see the logic in the paragraph that she is studying. What is the point trying to be made in this paragraph? What evidence does the author give to support that point?(usually 2 or 3 things) The idea is to help her see the order or progression in the original paragraphs and use that to help her organize the information for her paragraphs.

HTH

[mooooom]

makes revision a snap. Also, have her read her writing to you, out loud. Ask her how it sounds. You read it to her outloud. Ask her how it sounds. Read out of the book she is getting her info from. How does that sound?

If she really can't hear the difference, then at least you'll know what the problem is.

Unlike some others, I would be concerned with a child that can't put together a paragraph by her age. Writing should become a priority.

I did have one son who had trouble getting his thoughts on paper. I had him dictate to me and I typed his first draft as he dictated. Then he could make corrections.

[HollyinNNV]

I'd have her verbalize the outline for a couple days in a row BEFORE she commits her words to paper. Verbalizing the outline should help her eliminate the sentence fragments. It also allows you to praise strengths and suggest tiny improvements so that by the time she writes the paragraph, she has a better idea of what will work & what won't.

HTH,
Holly

[Beth in Central TX]

Your lament about handwriting triggered a memory of a newsletter that I read last spring. The IEW Newsletter dated spring 2007 had an excellent article on "Marking & Grading". Usually DH edits our boys' papers, but sometimes, he can't always make timely comments. I found the advice from this newsletter extremely helpful, and it has really assisted me in teaching my son to edit his own writing. The "sloppy copy" has been revolutionary in our writing approach.

Click the link to download the spring 2007 newsletter:
http://www.excellenceinwriting.com/index.php?q=articles-newsletters