What would you do?

[hpymomof3]

Several years ago friends of ours gave my son a Little Tykes bed after their son grew out of it. At the time I offered to pay for it but they declined. I ended up giving them a gift certificate for a restaurant. At the time I had no idea how expensive those beds are.

We have used the bed for about 6 years and now my son is too old for it so we decided to sell it on Ebay. We got a pretty good price for it but now I'm not sure what to do with the money.

On one hand we really need the money to pay for the new furniture that we bought for my son's room. On the other hand, I feel that we never paid for the bed so I'm wondering if I should give the money to my friend. Several months back I told her that would probably be getting rid of it or selling it. She said that she didn't want it back or want any money for it. I would feel funny if I offered to give her half because we never paid for it in the first place.

Any opinions?

[GreenKitty]

I would stop bringing it up with her, it's been 6 years and keep the money.
When I give, I do not expect anything in return nor ask nor accept.

[abbeyej]

If you spoke about it already and she declined both the return of the bed and any money from it, then I think you can consider the money yours to spend as you like. She gave a gift and has moved on with her life -- it was yours to do with as you liked. :) What a nice gift -- sounds like it served you very well!

[WendyK]

You already went above and beyond what they wanted for it by buying them a gift certificate. I give things to people all the time and I wouldn't be upset in the least if they managed to sell it and make money on it.

[Whisperlily]

You already went above and beyond what they wanted for it by buying them a gift certificate. I give things to people all the time and I wouldn't be upset in the least if they managed to sell it and make money on it.

I totally agree. I give things away that I'm fully aware that I could sell. If you had immediately turned around and sold it and never used it, I still wouldn't expect anything in return. Although in that case, I might have accepted a token amount if you'd put it in my hand. But, goodness, if you used it for 6 years, I would flat out refuse. It was yours, yours, yours.

[Diana in OR]

ITA w/the other posters. If I were the "giver", it wouldn't bother me at all if you sold the bed I gave you 6 years ago.

[Kris]

It was a gift. What you do with a gift after it is offered and accepted is up to you. I wouldn't feel the least bit awkward about selling it and using the money for something else, especially now that it's served it's purpose and it's time to move on.

Hope you got a good price for it! :-)

[Crissy]

Take your friends word as truth. Especially if you have recently discussed the bed, and the fact that you are selling it.
If you are uncomfortable spending the money, deposit it in your son's savings account.

[Suzanne in ABQ]

If you're uncomfortable spending the money on yourself, and she doesn't want it "back", then "give it forward". Donate it to your favorite charity, or buy someone something for someone who needs it, or invest it in your son's college education.

Interestingly, I once had a Little Tykes car bed that I got at a second-hand shop. I sold it to a friend when we were finished with it. It's been 9 years, and I still feel guilty that I didn't just give it to her. I'd gotten it second hand, and we'd used it for about four years. She, OTOH, had been thrilled to get it at such a discount (compared to new). Some of us are just doomed to feel guilty, no matter what we do. :o

[WTMindy]

I think you have made the effort and you can feel guilt free about keeping the money.

[kdeno]

I would keep the money and buy furniture.

Kari

[Heather in the Kootenays]

Or donate it to her favourite charity.