Are flowers the only appropriate thing to send for a death?

[Bess]

Or can one send something else...like a food gift basket or something like that? Obviously I know a card as well is appreciated. Just didn't know if there were other gift choices as well.

Thank you.

[nancypants]

Either that or a donation to a worthy cause in the name of the person who passed. For instance several times we have purchased Gideon Bibles in memory of a person that passed. Some places (like the Gideons) have Memorial cards that you then send to the family. If the person had a "pet cause" or favorite organization, this is a nice gesture. HTH

[BMC]

I think that some religions prefer plants to cut flowers too but that is a niggling thought in the back of my head and I don't know where it came from......

If its local, how about a call to a take out on a night that you know they are home and haven't cooked anything yet?

It really is the thought that counts.

[Pajama Mama]

If you look at the death notice in the paper it might tell you what the person's wishes were. It might say "In lieu of flowers, _______ has requested ..."

We just returned from Florida. We stayed at Give Kids the World Village. This trip was through Make A Wish. Give Kids the World accepts donations in the name of loved ones. You pay X amount and they will send a card to the family of the deceased. They will not list the amount of the donation on the card. There are many worthy causes. I will definitely send a donation to Give Kids the World if a family asks for no flowers. It is a wonderful organization.

[Maria from IN]

When my dad died a friend sent us a baby cherry tree. He could do anything with wood (and stained glass, for that matter) and cherry was his favorite. I thought it was very thoughtful. We put it in the front yard and watched it bloom every year.

[chai]

A gift card to a restaurant is a good choice. The family will likely be very busy over the next few weeks and will be too tired to cook. I know several people who have received this and loved it.

[mcconnellboys]

I think any of those are fine. People often make contributions in the name of the family or deceased to some worthy cause, as well. Some families even ask for this, in lieu of flowers.

Regena

[LizzyBee]

When someone dies all the neighbors and nearby relatives bring food. Usually people who have just lost a close relative don't feel like eating, much less cooking. Also, there are often relatives coming from out of town and it's nice to have something good to feed them so that you can relax at home with them rather than having to go to a restaurant.

[Plaid Dad]

Either that or a donation to a worthy cause in the name of the person who passed.

This is what we usually do, too.

[kalanamak]

that had a Hawaiian tune...something he liked. I think she liked best that I have his obit on my wall.

[Susan Wise Bauer]

a paid-up house cleaning from a local cleaning service is a great gift. At the time of a death, families are exhausted and overwhelmed AND expecting lots of company....not a great combination. Look in your Yellow Pages and talk to the local maid/cleaning service. I know that our local service will take your credit card number, send a certificate, and then wait to charge your card until the recipient calls to set up a time for the cleaning.

SWB

[Lorna in the boonies]

When our daughter died, my brother and his wife purchased Gideon Bibles in her name (they do this every year on her birthday, as well). We also had several people donate to our church in her memory (dh is a pastor), and a few people donated to the March of Dimes (she had a birth defect). Another friend sent a huge deli tray of luncheon meats/sandwich 'fixings', which really came in handy when all the relatives descended.

Personally, I preferred potted plants over cut flowers (my logic would probably not matter with most deaths, but I am throwing it out there, anyway). When the flowers died and had to be thrown away, I (in the midst of my not-logical grief) got pretty upset -- of course I couldn't keep a baby alive -- I couldn't even keep flowers alive! In comparison, I still have one potted plant that is still alive, and it has become very special to me because it is a (very small) tangible link to her.

[ELaurie]

I am sending an Edible Bouquet (http://www.ediblearrangements.com/arrangements/arrangements.aspx)