My dd has lost all trust in me.

[Remudamom]

She just caught me in the kitchen tasting the chili and then stirring it with the same spoon. She is a cootiephobe. She refuses to eat ice cream from grandma if grandma touches her ice cream with her finger.

She's actually pouting right now as she's setting the table although she's trying hard to keep me from noticing. She knows what happens when she pouts.

What do you think? Should I:
1. Tell her to grow up. She'll eat it and like it.
2. Let her pass on dinner. That leaves more for the rest of us.
3. Tell her I've always done this and she hasn't died yet, and that from now
she can expect my cooties in everything I prepare?

She is 13 for Pete's sake. Shouldn't she be past the cootie/germ stage by now?

[Alana in Canada]

Have her go without dinner and don't fix her anything special.
Invite her to fry herself an egg after you've done whatever it is you do in the kitchen after dinner.

That's all.

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

She just caught me in the kitchen tasting the chili and then stirring it with the same spoon. She is a cootiephobe. She refuses to eat ice cream from grandma if grandma touches her ice cream with her finger.

She's actually pouting right now as she's setting the table although she's trying hard to keep me from noticing. She knows what happens when she pouts.

What do you think? Should I:
1. Tell her to grow up. She'll eat it and like it.
2. Let her pass on dinner. That leaves more for the rest of us.
3. Tell her I've always done this and she hasn't died yet, and that from now
she can expect my cooties in everything I prepare?

She is 13 for Pete's sake. Shouldn't she be past the cootie/germ stage by now?

Tell her the heat from the boiling of the chili kills all cooties from the cook. And to grow up. That you've always done it and she hasn't died yet, which proves your point about the heat. And if she wants to pass on dinner, it'll leave more for the rest of you. ;)

Seriously, though, some kids (and grownups) have more of an ick factor about such things. You could maybe tell her you'll try to do better in the future, but not to hold her breath.

[Michelle in MO]

For the purists, I guess that would be contaminating the food, though! I agree with Alana in Canada: let her make her own, germ-free dinner! :)

I have a friend who makes an entire batch of chocolate chip cookie dough, and eats almost all of it herself, but bakes a "complimentary" dozen for the family. :D

[Jean in Newcastle]

Tell her that the chili being on the stove meant that the cooties were all burned up!

Really, if she starts to make this a huge deal in her mind she can end up with a full-blown phobia. I say this because I have a son who has a phobia to escalators. He is 10 and will grab on to me and hold on for dear life. Everyone around stares at him. Lately we've started aversion therapy - I make him ride escalators in the malls with none of us within touching distance. It may seem mean but if I don't he will end up "handicapping" himself. What if he is at a conference later in life with his boss and they come to an escalator? With your daughter she could end up being a "Niles Crane" (from "Frazier" - who can't touch anyone or anything without being worried about the germs).

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

Tell her that the chili being on the stove meant that the cooties were all burned up!

Really, if she starts to make this a huge deal in her mind she can end up with a full-blown phobia. I say this because I have a son who has a phobia to escalators. He is 10 and will grab on to me and hold on for dear life. Everyone around stares at him. Lately we've started aversion therapy - I make him ride escalators in the malls with none of us within touching distance. It may seem mean but if I don't he will end up "handicapping" himself. What if he is at a conference later in life with his boss and they come to an escalator? With your daughter she could end up being a "Niles Crane" (from "Frazier" - who can't touch anyone or anything without being worried about the germs).

Yeah, Remundamom, you guys could do a Monk marathon. ;)

[Remudamom]

Well, we went with almost all of it. Her sister told her the germs would be killed. I basically told her to eat it or I would make her eat it. No cooking on her own because I'm just a meanie. And then everyone would want to do it everytime they didn't like what I was serving.

She has lots of little issues like this. When I discover them I do my best to kindly and firmly nip them in the bud. I shudder to think what she would be like if we didn't.

But Jean, maybe she could help your son. She likes to go to malls just so she can ride the escalators. Pathetic little ranch child.

[Jean in Newcastle]

But Jean, maybe she could help your son. She likes to go to malls just so she can ride the escalators. Pathetic little ranch child.

LOL! She's welcome any time!

[Kelli in TN]

Well, I freak out when my husband does that, so I understand.

I also cannot ride escalators and my mother's aversion therapy did nothing but make it worse.

So I guess I have no advice here, as I am probably the worst basket case on here!

But now I know that I am not eating dinner at Remudamom's house and I will not go shopping with Jean. Ever.:D

[Remudamom]

HEY, I never do that when we're having company.

snicker.

[Heidi in CA]

Every time he starts getting weird on me I tell him he used to suck on his brothers toes... He gets totally grossed out and decides that whatever he is having a problem with can't be worse than his brothers toes and we go forward. Works every time!

Heidi

[Jean in Wisc]

Eeeew!

We use a clean spoon each time we taste it--we either wash the spoon in the hot, soapy water in the sink (which is there for just this sort of thing) or pull out a new one each time.

I can't think of anyone in my family who'd be thrilled eating it after someone put the spoon back into the pot--even if it were boiling.

And if you think that is bad...I live with Monk2. He won't fill the water glasses too early before a meal because there would be DUST on it by the time he drank it.

LOLOLOLOL!

Now if I could keep my house that clean....but alas! No such luck.

[Tracy in Ky]

She just caught me in the kitchen tasting the chili and then stirring it with the same spoon.


Ooooh...that really grosses me out too. I wouldn't want eat something that the cook had done that to. :eek:

bleh.

[Diane]

I wouldn't want to eat it either...LOL We use clean spoons to taste things. Then again, we won't drink from each others cups either.

[Crissy]

We use a clean spoon each time we taste it--we either wash the spoon in the hot, soapy water in the sink (which is there for just this sort of thing) or pull out a new one each time.


We do the same. The idea of someone's saliva in the soup is a bit much for me. :eek:

[Brigitte]

I have a friend who makes an entire batch of chocolate chip cookie dough, and eats almost all of it herself, but bakes a "complimentary" dozen for the family. :D


Right, the "friend." It's always the "friend." ;)

[Brigitte]

I do the same and never give it a thought. Sorry folks. But, I don't sample with the stiring spoon when cooking for guests. At least, I don't think I do. Hmmm, now to invite people over for dinner.....

[Julpost]

I do the same thing....it's no biggie around here. I'm probably the least worried person I know about that kind of thing, and no kidding, I get sick the least too. I know this will gross everyone out, I'm glad nobody knows me here from real life, but I used to use my xh's toothbrush sometimes if I couldn't find mine for some reason. I remember when I mentioned that to my dh early on in our marriage. He couldn't believe it-I was surprised anyone would be so disgusted. Boy, have I come a long way. His mother all but passed out when I shared my glass of juice with ds when he was just a toddler.

I don't know. Maybe I should have a greater aversion but to me, family is family...it just doesn't bother me. :o

[Karin]

She is 13 for Pete's sake. Shouldn't she be past the cootie/germ stage by now?


Not necessarily. But you could tell her that the cooking heat will kill any germs from your mouth. Not sure if that's totally true, but possible. When I refused to eat something that had dropped on the floor, my dad told me that there are more germs in my mouth than on that floor. And we had pets. And he was right. What I didn't realize at the time was that they weren't necessarily the same germs. I was a germ a phobe for a very long time.

[Alexandra]

to child by means of saliva. Pretty sure they weren't talking about food that was boiling on the stove. I think folks should use a fresh spoon frankly. I am also uptight about double dipping too. Just plain ol' good manners.

[Unicorn]

I I know this will gross everyone out, I'm glad nobody knows me here from real life, but I used to use my xh's toothbrush sometimes if I couldn't find mine for some reason. . :o


:eek: :eek: :eek: Ok, now that is just Gross!!!!! I can handle the spoon thing, I see no problem at all w/ sharing the juice with the kiddo. BUT, the toothbrush. no. way. in. he*l. not ever! Eeewww, eeewwww, eeewwww- Yuck! Blech! Ick!

[HeatherH]

I do the same thing....it's no biggie around here. I'm probably the least worried person I know about that kind of thing, and no kidding, I get sick the least too.

That is SOOOO funny - I am very lax about germs (much to the horror of both my eldest daughter and my nurse sister-in-law) and am probably one of the least sick people I know. My kids don't get sick much, either. . . .

Of course, 15 yo dd says, "Mom. When I grow up, I will NOT let my kids eat something that fell on the floor."

But they can always come to Grammy's ;)

[ereks mom]

Yeah, Remundamom, you guys could do a Monk marathon. ;)

I love that show. Monk is hilarious. And he reminds me of my brother, who is, in fact, OCD, albeit "mildly". :)

[Jean in Newcastle]

I also cannot ride escalators and my mother's aversion therapy did nothing but make it worse.

But now I know that I am not eating dinner at Remudamom's house and I will not go shopping with Jean. Ever.:D

It's ok Kelli, I only do aversion therapy on my own dc! - and in his case, if he has no one to "play up to" he actually does ok. I'm really proud of how he's been able to ride on his own and tell him that every time!

Boy, I guess you guys had better not come to our house either!!! I taste test with the cooking spoon, drink out of someone else's cup etc. And I rarely get sick (and I wouldn't do it if I was sick at the time.) My dh says it's just like kissing! (Now my dd6 says that kissing grosses her out! Eeeew!)

[Linda...inOwasso]

Wow.... did this post bring up bad childhood memories!! The thought of anyone eating from the community pot (so to speak) makes my stomach turn! Yuck-O! I can remember my mom doing the same when I was a child.... licking cookie batter off her finger after she spooned them onto the cookie sheet REPEATEDLY. If you are all alone and cooking only for yourself then I say GO FOR IT, but I think it just shows a lack of respect for others to do these things when you're preparing a meal for them.

I didn't appreciate it when my mom did it to me so I don't do it to my family. I definitely come down on the "it's disgusting" side.

[Remudamom]

Okay, I don't have a problem with spousal tooth brush sharing. But my dh had a coniption fit when he found out I "borrowed" his electric razor to do a little minor trimming on one of the horses. He has a beard now.

[Pensguys]

I will use the same spoon to taste and then stir but ONLY if we aren't having company. I'll taste with a clean spoon if I'm taking a dish somewhere. I'll share a drink with my dh. I mean, I KISS him so what's the difference?!

I DO draw the line at sharing a toothbrush though....I don't care HOW desperate I am. I'll use my finger and toothpaste if I forget my toothbrush while on a trip until I can buy another one (or ask the front desk).

[melissel]

For the purists, I guess that would be contaminating the food, though! I agree with Alana in Canada: let her make her own, germ-free dinner! :)

I have a friend who makes an entire batch of chocolate chip cookie dough, and eats almost all of it herself, but bakes a "complimentary" dozen for the family. :D

Have we met??? :D

[melissel]

Oh, this thread is totally helping me out of my funk :p This would not bother me in the least. We share cups, spoons, napkins, and yes, even toothbrushes on occasion! My DH (the man who uses my toothbrush and zrbrts directly on the girls' lips :rolleyes:) was upset that I wasn't more stringent about teaching DD5 not to taste out of the bowl of whatever we were mixing up--but, isn't that part of the fun of having kids cook with you? I'm in the "the heat kills off the bad stuff" camp!

So what did she finally end up eating???

[RoughCollie]

I don't taste food when I cook -- I can tell by the smell or by the ingredients I used whether it is going to taste right. There's no reason for that, it's just the way I've always been.

If anyone wants to taste food while it is cooking, I make them use a clean spoon each time.

I never share toothbrushes. I wash them in the dishwasher frequently as I am convinced they are germ traps.

I don't eat off of other people's plates and I don't let anyone eat off mine.

The kids won't do any of that either, but they sure did when they were little (with each other's drinks and food).

RC

[NicksMama-Zack's Mama Too]

Then I gently remind him that when he was 18 months old he ran away from me in the shopping mall so he could pick up a half-eaten Aunt Annie's pretzel covered with dust bunnies and pop it into his mouth before I could catch him. Yep, he swallowed the whole thing.:eek: I tell him that was his "germ pill" and he is so full of antibodies from it - he's only had one infection over his almost 12 years of life. No little bit of germs from any family member is gonna harm him.:o

[Karin]

to child by means of saliva. Pretty sure they weren't talking about food that was boiling on the stove. I think folks should use a fresh spoon frankly. I am also uptight about double dipping too. Just plain ol' good manners.

I use a fresh spoon, too, even though I know darn well that most bacteria that could make me sick via someone's saliva is killed by cooking. But I'm not completely over my germ-phobia, and certainly think other people's saliva is icky, for no logical reason. Good thing I didn't mind my babies', though, when they went through the drooling stage, or they would have been neglected!

[Karin]

But Jean, maybe she could help your son. She likes to go to malls just so she can ride the escalators. Pathetic little ranch child.

:D I grew up in a rural area (we called it the country, but my American born dh insists that country means farm/ranch land, not logging, fishing and tourism country) and when I was a kid took a very, very long time to take that first step onto the escalator. My mother couldn't figure out what took me so long, but I was always concerned I'd get pinched when that stair came out flat! We went to the city a couple of times a year back then, although when I was in high school we took the ferry in at least once a month. (and I was NOT born or raised on an island, but there still is no connecting road as it would be far too long.)

[Remudamom]

Well, a ranch or farm sounds like country to me, while logging or fishing sounds a bit more exciting.....maybe "The Great Outdoors".

[Karin]

Well, a ranch or farm sounds like country to me, while logging or fishing sounds a bit more exciting.....maybe "The Great Outdoors".

I guess it's all what you're used to.:D Growing up around loggers and fishermen (not too many fisherwomen when I was a kid, save 1 woman I knew) is no more or less exciting than growing up around anyone else. Except that most of them were away for weeks at a time. Ranching seemed so much more exciting to me when I was a kid. Although, I'm sure some might find it interesting to know that my dad and his colleagues took sea planes on house calls to logging camps back in the 1960s.

[Blue Hen]

EWWWWW, me too! We use a clean spoon everytime, always, whether or not there's company coming. No sharing glasses, or toothbrushes----YUCKO!!

and when we go to a Chinese Restaurant I do not share my dish or sample from anyone else's dish.

[sdWTMer]

that it was my duty to boost her immune system. That you've been doing it all this time and feel the need to continue it for the future. :D Pardon my snarky comment.

[Joanne]

Honestly? I'd like to encourage you to prayerfully consider if her "issues" rise to the level of needing outside help.

It sounds possibly OCDish, which is treatable with medication and therapy.

I am a "suck it up and get over it" mom in many cases, but something in your posts makes me wonder if there is something "more" and perhaps we are treating this disrespectfully.

[Cadam]

Tell her you are boiling it to kill the germs. :rolleyes:

[Canada_Mom]

that it was my duty to boost her immune system.

LOL! I like this reply! I'm more of the "change spoon each time" approach myself, but you had me laughing. :p To each their own...