Having a hard time accepting son's "struggles"

[BMW]

Son had a dx of dyslexia and adhd at 2nd grade. He has overcome the dyslexia and is 6th grade. I know that adhd describes him to a t. But, he also has some very real memory problems... don't know if this is adhd or not.

For example, he does not remember what he is taught. I have to tell him over and over to put spaces between words in a sentence. He doesn't us capitalization and punctuation accurately (about 40%). He misspells many easy words. He can pass 12-15 words spelling each week, but cannot write out answers to questions or write a paragraph without several misspellings. We're talking words that he has had over and over.

He does great learning science and history. He can recall all sorts of things that he watches and reads in those subjects. I am teaching using many approaches - orally, repetition, activities...

I get very frustrated. I don't think he forgets on purpose. He is not willfully working this way. I don't think it's his fault. But I feel so impatient with him (so the problems with me).

Thanks for listening...

Bee

[Mesa]

You just described my son to a "T", so far he has only been diagnosed with ADHD, SPD, and poor short term memory.
He's only 8.
I was hoping he would out grow this. Dang it.

[BMW]

I believe mine has the SPD, too, like my youngest aspie boy. I think it's a lifetime work in progress... sigh...

[LizzyBee]

I know how you feel. I am waiting for test results for my 12 yo and 7 yo. They have both already been dx with APD. The younger one also has SPD, and she had significant speech issues. She's no longer in speech therapy, but she still struggles with long words, long sentences, and grammar. Some days I think they're going to be fine, and other days I cry with worry for their futures.

[BMW]

I noticed that some speech problems were there... but I don't think they've ever been addressed. Like, saying aminal, instead of animal and a lot of slurred r words... weird things that come and go... and even though he is smart in "some" areas, he chooses vocabulary that is very 3 year old-ish. When he talks, he just comes across as very unintelligent, even if he is sharing something great! He chooses 3-5 year old words... so I ask him if he can re-state it using more mature words and he can about 70% of the time... he just doesn't do so on a regular basis on his own.

He struggles with long words... he starts to sound them out at the beginning and then just makes something up... and will read words wrong and say a nonsense word that does not make sense instead of using context clues to sound out the right word. He is read to and exposed to great vocabulary...

Anyway, it's helpful today to just chat with some of you and express these things...

[Laurie4b]

The spelling issues and capitalization/punctuation are part of dyslexia. The method I used that has worked for my sons is overteaching using a most frequent word list. I'm tired right now, or I'd search for the link. There is a post I made called Overteaching spelling that describes the method. The capitalization/punctuation issues are taken care of as well in the dictation part of this approach.

[Michelle T]

Mine doesn't do great in any subject, and forgets everything, not just spelling or math facts! It's like his head is full of holes!

But I understand exactly what you are talking about. I get very frustrated at times, I often feel completely discouraged, I worry about DS's future.
MichelleT

[Paz]

I would assume that spelling is a very common problem with dyslexia. My dd is dyslexic. She is 16 and while her spelling has improved it is still at about the 4th or 5th grade level. We continue to work to remediate it. One positive thing is that with computers now spelling isn't as big of a deal. She was recently tested and also has some short term memory deficits which do often accompany dyslexia and I think ADHD also. Her educational psychologist recommended Brain Age to help with memory. My dd is the same with memory in science and history. I don't know why she is able to retain so much in these subjects. Math is our biggest struggle right now.

[cillakat]

<<Like, saying aminal, instead of animal >>
that's part of the dyslexia

<<he chooses vocabulary that is very 3 year old-ish. When he talks, he just comes across as very unintelligent, even if he is sharing something great! He chooses 3-5 year old words... so I ask him if he can re-state it using more mature words and he can about 70% of the time... he just doesn't do so on a regular basis on his own. >>

could also be part of the dyslexia. word recall is part of the weakness.

<<He struggles with long words... he starts to sound them out at the beginning and then just makes something up... and will read words wrong and say a nonsense word that does not make sense instead of using context clues to sound out the right word.>>

wait, how was his dyslexia treated/'overcome'? ftmp, he shouldn't be using context clues to figure out a word...this is a massive red flag. he should be able to sound it out, break down the syllables as needed based on the six syllabification rules.... guessing really has no part in it - even when using 'context clues' (ie language left over from the dreadful 'whole language/implicit phonics debacle)

since his spelling is still such an issue, I'd consider the possibility that he still needs some fundamental work in the encoding/decoding areas. It's possible that just using AAS would be significant enough to help wtih the decoding since ftmp, he is reading well. iirc AAS covers syllabification.

:)
K

[ElizabethB]

My free online phonics lessons cover syllabification and spelling.

I've found that many of my students start doing better in their other subjects once their reading and spelling improve.

Oral spelling seems to be helpful memory work for some of my students.

Webster's Speller is also good for syllabification, but I'd work through my online lessons first, they'll make it easy to understand how Webster's works, I teach most of the syllables in Webster's Syllabary in the lessons.

[BMW]

Just got back after not checking in a while...

callikat - when I say his dyslexia has been mostly overcome, I mean that when I taught him how to form his letters, he stopped writing them in reverse. Just that practice of writing them with me changed and he almost never writes them in reverse. I think there is more to dyslexia than I know about!! Thank you for taking time to disect this with me... I figured if he didn't write them in reverse, the problem was over... silly me!

And Elizabeth, thank you for the ideas and information. I will follow up... today is another rough day... time to take a hug break and look at some new ideas...

Bee