Would you put this guy in school????

[cranberrymom]

Hi-I am wondering if anyone has any advice on my situation. I wonder if anyone has experienced this. I have a 4 1/2 year old in preschool right now. He has sensory issues, adhd suspected not yet officially diagnosed he has improved immensely since being put on the Feingold diet. I am hs ing my 11 and 12 yo sons. The days that he is in school are very productive for my guys at home. I had always assumed I would homeschool him, but his behavior is so much better for his teachers and he loves school. I feel as though I am only putting out fires as opposed to teaching and enjoying him the days he is home. I am the leader of my homeschool support group and wholehearted believe in homeschooling. I just don't feel any conviction or pull either way with my littlest one. I was thinking perhaps private school, but like most finances are tight. I do see part of this as he is maturing and I am learning strategies for parenting him so things could get easier but I am not convinced after homeschooling my other kids for 7 years that I am up for the challenge.
Any prayers would be appreciated, also. :confused:
Terri, Mom to 4 sons

[Tree House Academy]

Having a son with ADHD myself and having pulled him out FINALLY after 3rd grade and so many issues, I can't count them all on one hand, I give a huge hearty, "No!" It really isn't about the teachers or how much my son loved school...for him, the hurt came when the other kids noticed how different he was and started to treat him like an outcast. He came home with hurt feelings and in tears (or a BAD mood) more times than I can count. It was so hard for him - and with as much as he loved school and loved his teachers, the teasing and conflict was always just over the top.

Beyond that, I noticed that, even though my son was a straight A student in school, when I got him home, the gaps in his learning were incredible! I honestly attribute a lot of it to him being in trouble so much - he missed things because he was being sent to the office or having to write when the others were playing an educational game in class. It was BAD.

Having him at home is hard sometimes. My youngest son is NOT adhd. He is very calm and pleasant and a total contrast to my older son. It can get really irritating at times, but the positive changes in him since I brought him home prove to me that this is still the best decision for him...even given how much harder he is to parent in general. God gave me THIS child for a reason...He knew what He was doing...even though sometimes I don't! LOL

[cranberrymom]

:iagree:God gave me THIS child for a reason...He knew what He was doing...even though sometimes I don't! LOL __________________

[Stacy in NJ]

Perhaps you can do what works for the time being? If preschool works for your family -- do it. Trying Kindergarten at a private or public school doesn't mean that it must be permanent. How about doing it on a trial basis? I recommend making your decision year by year. When ps/private school begins to NOT work for your son, homeschooling could be the answer.

[Ottakee]

I would say that it depends. Would he go to K next year or DK/Young 5s? Would he continue to get extra help? How big would his classroom be? The teacher, any aides and the mix of other kids all play a role in this.

School can be very good, OK , or very bad----all depending on the variables above.

Since it is only Dec. you don't have to decide now. Why not see how things are going in April or May and then ask the teachers about the classroom he might go to in the fall and then visit it, talk with the teachers, etc.

I had my son home for 2nd (when his adoption was finalized)-5th grade and then he went to public school for the rest of the time. 1st grade was terrible for him but we couldn't homeschool yet but 6-12 grades were wonderful for him and he loved it.

My girls went to preschool but then I took them home as the K setting they wanted my now 13dd in would not have been good for her. We might put her in school come highschool (2 more years) but I don't know yet. We just take it year by year.

[Cadam]

It is totally dependent on the child and the school situation and your goals for schooling and your reasons for homeschooling.

You will find that Occupational Therapy greatly improves the situation and you can do more sessions at home throughout the day than most schools can do. At home you can also carefully monitor his diet so that there are no infractions that cause problems.

You can't really evaluate it now, wait until spring or Summer to decide.

[newlifemom]

Terri,

I don't have a good answer for you and these other ladies have given you a lot to chew on for the next few months. The only thing I would want to add is: Consider what putting him into school may do to his 'record' and how your state veiws any type of LD. I have heard that some school districts attempt to force a parent to place their spec. ed. children into schools. I don't know if that is the case in your state or local school district but I would want to check it out. KWIM? I am very leery of having my son labeled at the school b/c then they may say that I am not equipped to hs him.

Just something else to ponder. Will pray, t.o.t.a.l.l.y.understand.

[Cadam]

Pam, just fyi, that isn't really an issue in Oregon. They want the kids in ps for the $$ but I have never heard of them really trying to stop anyone from pulling a kid out or saying that the parent isn't qualified. I know they do that in Penn. but, as you are learning, it is a bit more laid back out West :D