Should I visit Mom when I have a cold?

[BamaTanya]

(Update: Mom's on hospice care at home - breast cancer - lost 50 lbs)

I've been visiting Mom every day. Dad is caring for her constantly, and hospice nurses visit a couple times a week. When I go over, Dad can run errands or take a much needed nap. He will not leave her alone. She chokes. :(

I've kept the dc away when they were sick with fevers.

Now I'm sick. No fever, but headache and scratchy cough.

How contagious/dangerous do you think I am? Could I still relieve Dad without touching Mom? I bring her drinks and wipe her face with damp cloths when she's nauseated. We watch TV.

I want to help, but don't know if it's wise right now. Everyone else in the family works, but they could help out this weekend . . .

tia

[BamaTanya]

They had fevers and stomachache.

[Jackie in AR]

Could you wear a face mask when you are with her while you are sick?

That's what family members do when they need to be near my BIL (he's doing chemo).

[Sharon in SC]

I'm afraid this is a judgment call you will ultimately have to make but, for what it is worth, if your only symptom is a cough and headache without fever), then you could go wearing a mask and be *religious* about washing your hands and probably be OK. Fact is, there are many a nurse that report to work with those symptoms every day. :-}

[nuthouse]

I wouldn't. The risk to her is too great as well as the risk to her caregiver. I would call and offer "long distance" help. Could you run a few errands? Pick up prescriptions? Drop of dry cleaning? Return casserole dishes to friends? Do some paper work for them at home? Make some phone calls for this and that? Make sure their auto has had a lube, oil and filter change?

I'm sure if you wash your hands carefully, and use rigorous germ control you can help out in these ways. I know when I am recovering from surgery I'm eternally grateful to those who admit they are under the weather and gracefully bow out of helping.

Don't feel guilty about not helping if you are sick. You are truly helping by keeping the extra burden of additional illnes away. Best wishes for your own decision and I'm sending you a virtual hot mug of tea with lemon, a nice warm comforter, a book, and a sunny window to read by this afternoon. Rest, you'll do you part next week.