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View Full Version : My mild special needs kid is thriving this year- I never would have guessed it...


juls
11-19-2008, 11:14 AM
My ds is now in the 4th grade. At age 6 we knew he was struggling in life and we sought some answers. He's been a tough kid to pin down because he has multiple issues, but they are all on the mild side.

He has several diagnosis that I don't really think are correct. We were told he was "borderline ADHD" (after psychological testing) and "the mildest case of autism I have seen" (by a DAN doctor). And then he has some diagnosis that do fit- Sensory Processing Disorder, Tourette Syndrome and some OCD (what I now believe is actually Tourettic OCD). His intelligence is above average but he processes very slowly. Some academic skills are difficult for him- handwriting and spelling- but generally he does well academically. Behavior has been our biggest issue throughout the years. Homeschooling was often a battle because he would get "stuck" about something (maybe a video game he couldn't stop thinking about) and he couldn't work.

My older son began at a small Classical Christian school last year and we were wondering if this child would be able to handle it given his difficulties. Social issues and self control are a bit tough for him sometimes. We gave him the option to go and he said no way (he hates new things). But he actually changed his mind a week before the school year.

I was very nervous for him but I must say that he is now thriving in life like never before. He has almost become a new kid. His conference level is high and he is doing well academically AND socially. He is one of the best behaved kids in his class. He tells me he is developing a "reputation for kindness." This is my very mess disorganized child, but somehow he keeps his binder neat and in perfect order (unlike his older brother). His teachers all have wonderful things to say about him. I would have never guessed this in a million years.

In fact, he was tested by the public school last year in order to qualify for OT and ST services (which he did) and the tester told me that this child would defiantly not do well in public school because he does not submit to authority very well. And it's true that if this kid doesn't like you he won't work for you.

Anyway, I've been a homeschooler for nine years (I'm still homeschooling one child), and in years past I have used and posted on this board regularly to seek help. Now if I had my dream I would been homeschooling all of my children until college. But I must humbly admit that this small classical Christian school with its nurturing environment is giving my son the social skills and confidence that he was really lacking at home. Our family is active in church, scouts, soccer and karate so my kids have always been in social situations, but nothing has grown this child more than these last three months at school. Who would have guessed it?

Anyway, I just wanted to relay this story in case it actually might help someone with a similar child.

Juls

Violet
11-20-2008, 08:49 AM
Wow, Juls, thank you for sharing this! How wonderful for your child.

Best wishes, and please keep us posted!

Anita

LizzyBee
11-20-2008, 12:55 PM
Juls,

Is the school making any accomodations for your ds? My 12 yo dd wants to go back to school, maybe for 8th grade, but definitely for high school. Her LDs are so mild that I know she won't qualify for services, and the law has just changed so that students who are ineligible for services can't get classroom accomodations either. I want to have faith that she can thrive in a classroom if that's what she wants, but I'm so scared she won't. If I keep homeschooling her because I think she can't cut it in a classroom (not that I would explain it to her that way), I worry how that will affect her self-esteem and motivation, but at the same time, a bad experience in school could be devastating. The school she'd attend is a small public charter school where my oldest attends.

I'm glad your ds is doing well!

juls
11-20-2008, 11:12 PM
Elizabeth,

I am absolutely shocked at how my ds has risen to the challenge of school. I thought he would have many issues- including small things like buttoning his pants since fine motor skills are still lagging. I have been astonished by what my son is doing. They have not had to accommodate him at all- yet the teachers are aware of his issues in case something flares. He has had one mini meltdown in school in the middle of a test that he froze up on. He left the test to call home to say he was sick because he couldn't recall the answers. The teacher got him back into the room and calmed him down- he ended up with an 80% on that test.

He does still have melt downs at home sometimes (tonight was a biggie). But he can articulate that he gives everything he has to school and sometimes it call comes out on us. He did apologize to us tonight. Overall, he is a much happier kid though.

I wanted to share my experience because there may be some folks like me who really doubted that their kid would do well in a school setting. We did not send our son until HE said he was ready to try it out. My son is an all or nothing kid and he has really given this his all. I think he likes what he is becoming (rather successful and quite happy).

If your dd thinks she can do it then maybe its worth a try. She may have something to prove.

Juls