Anyone who has read BabyWise and followed it...

[Kristafish]

Would you list your schedules Please :D
I know they show a sample in the book, but I'm just wondering how you do it?

Thanks in advance for showing me http://www.mysmiley.net/imgs/smile/happy/happy0042.gif (http://www.mrblonde.com.au)

[Scarlett]

Well, apparently many people on this board think this book is evil, but I bought it when ds was 5 weeks old and that very night he slept through the night. I didn't starve him, or deny him EVER, but just the very simple step of doing the feed, awake, sleep order worked wonders for us. Honestly, like most books written by 'experts' I take what I want and leave the rest. I guess I left most of it very far behind because I can't for the life of me remember all the horrible parts of that book.

My son is almost 8 now, so I can't remember much. I just remember how the order worked for us. I certainly kept feeding him as often as he wanted. I just didn't nurse him to sleep mainly.

[Hillary in KS]

Well, I've done it two different ways: twice starting with newborns, and once starting with a four month old.

The first thing I must say is DO NOT BE A SCHEDULE NAZI! The schedule is a tool to help develop a rhythm for your child's day. It is not an absolute ("Baby is hungry, but he must wait another 30 minutes to eat", etc.) INot that you would do that, but too many parents use Babywise inflexibly, causing heath issues for baby - not good.

Anyway, with both the newborns I spent the first week or two just getting adjusted to having them around and getting my milk established. During this time, we sort of naturally fell into a feeding rhythm. With each child, I sensed how long they'd normally go before getting hungry (not going over 4 hours between feedings), and start from there.

I awakened them at the same time every morning, and then did the eat, wake, sleep cycle from there. gently, over the course of several days, we'd adjust to a fairly regular pattern of nursing.

With the 4 month old, we already were nursing at regular intervals, I just implemented the eat/wake/sleep schedule and made sure to awaken him at the same time each morning.

One of my babies was a great sleeper. I could lay him in the crib awake, and he'd fall asleep on his own. The other two needed a bit more training, but I did not let them "cry it out" until they were closer to age 1. Under 6 months, we rocked to sleep, and laid down together, etc.

I hope this helps. Babywise can be a good tool, if used moderately and wisely.

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

Well, apparently many people on this board think this book is evil, but I bought it when ds was 5 weeks old and that very night he slept through the night. I didn't starve him, or deny him EVER, but just the very simple step of doing the feed, awake, sleep order worked wonders for us. Honestly, like most books written by 'experts' I take what I want and leave the rest. I guess I left most of it very far behind because I can't for the life of me remember all the horrible parts of that book.

My son is almost 8 now, so I can't remember much. I just remember how the order worked for us. I certainly kept feeding him as often as he wanted. I just didn't nurse him to sleep mainly.

You likely read the later versions of the book. There are not to my knowledge any American Academy of Pediatrics warnings about that one. :)

[Scarlett]

You likely read the later versions of the book. There are not to my knowledge any American Academy of Pediatrics warnings about that one. :)


Ah....that would explain it. I am pretty sure my 'schedule' when he was 5 weeks old still ended up with me nursing him every 1 1/2 to 2 hours during the day.

[Michelle in MO]

Babywise can be a good tool, if you follow it with flexibility. I used it with all three of our daughters, but I had to learn to not be a "legalist" and be flexible. The schedule is yours and the baby's servant, not your master! That's the key!

I started my oldest when she was 4 months old (because that's when I first heard about it), thinking it was the stupidest program I'd ever heard of, but thought I'd give it a try. She slept through the night within a week! I started the other two on it right away. I learned to "listen" to their cries and think carefully, "Are they hungry? Could they be wet? Just tired or fussy?" It's a tool to help you think before just reacting.

It's hard to say that there's a definitive way to apply the principles, because all babies are so different, but I would say---keep yourself well-rested, and keep up your milk supply! Eat well, drink lots of wholesome liquids. When your baby wakes up, nurse him or her on both sides, do the usual burping them, changing them, etc. Getting them to stay awake after feeding is a process; it doesn't happen overnight! Newborns are naturally sleepy. You just have to keep trying, but don't get too hung up on the time frame. They will eventually learn to stay awake better after nursing, and then they will gradually learn to fall asleep on their own. I did find it very helpful for my own girls to not get into a habit of having to rock them or hold them to sleep. That does not mean that I neglected to rock them and hold them! They got plenty of loving---but I tried to let them go to sleep naturally.

Again, remember, think of the "schedule" as a "framework" to help you and the baby along. The "schedule" is your servant, not yours (or the baby's) master. Eventually a rhythm will develop to your day, and the baby will learn to fall asleep. Oh---and don't fail to look for the normal things you should look for to make sure your baby is well-nourished: are they nursing on both sides? are you getting plenty of wet diapers (and the other kind) during the day? are they gaining weight? are they generally contented after eating, or very fussy? Use your common sense and watch for these things.

Blessings to you and your newborn, in learning to apply these principles! Remember---they are general principles, but not hard and fast rules! Maybe not everyone has success with Babywise, but my younger two girls did sleep through the night relatively early (around 7 weeks) and they both gained weight well (90th percentile throughout their first year) and were very happy, contented. If the program doesn't work for you or leaves you feeling very frustrated, try talking to someone close by (if possible) who might be familiar and can help you with your concerns. If it still doesn't work, then find what does work for you, and rest content. Your baby will be fine. :)

[Cadam]

I just feed my babies about every 2.5 hours (and then 3 - 3.5 hours as the got older) when they were hungry. After eating I play with them for a bit and then put them to sleep when they show signs of sleepiness. No real schedules here, just a routine.

[King Alfred Academy]

Well, apparently many people on this board think this book is evil, but I bought it when ds was 5 weeks old and that very night he slept through the night. I didn't starve him, or deny him EVER, but just the very simple step of doing the feed, awake, sleep order worked wonders for us. Honestly, like most books written by 'experts' I take what I want and leave the rest. I guess I left most of it very far behind because I can't for the life of me remember all the horrible parts of that book..

I agree with all of this. We had both ds on schedules and it worked well for us. I, too, did not starve them or deny them anything they needed when they needed it. They responded very well to it. In fact, my second child was in the NICU for 10 days after he was born and *they* had him on a schedule. I know it wasn't because it was "what was best for the nurses" because *I* had to be there every 3 hours to feed him during the day and then let him sleep as late as he could during the night and they were very strict about it.
Unfortunately I don't remember my schedule either. I know I fed them every three hours during the day (with the last feeding being around 11pm) and then let them sleep through the night (with a early morning feeding around 5 am).
We did not follow the book to a "T", just like we do not follow any educational philosophy to a "T". We picked and chose what worked for us.
Hope this helps a bit

[Kristafish]

I'm not a big schedule person anyway, so we will see how we do.
I'm not due until April anyway but I wanted to see how others did with this book :)
I'm sure I will follow the book some, but not totally.. It would just be so nice to have baby sleeping through the night at an early age :D

Thanks again ladies :)

[prairiegirl]

I don't know whether it is so much the schedule that is important as it is the routine of feeding/playing/sleeping. As long as you follow that routine regardless of how much time in between feedings, is what is more important. At least that is how it worked for us. I never kept the same schedule, but the routime was always the same.

Julia
mom of 3 (8,7,5)

[Peek a Boo]

I didn't continue following a strict schedule, but yeah, the philosophy of NOT nursing them to sleep was wonderful! I wish I had found it w/ my 1st instead of my 5th :-)

Good luck!

[jail warden]

This is to fit with YOUR lifestyle. I have a friend and I who did this at the same time. They were much more laid back at that time and our life was more where we were routine for the most part(not anymore with my husband in law enforcement:(). It worked awesome for both of us.

[3lilreds in NC]

It saved me when I had my first dd. I never refused to feed her when she was hungry, but if I hadn't taken the class, I would have had no idea what to do with a new baby!

My first dd was a scheduling dream for the most part. I can remember times when she refused to nap, but her schedule changed exactly like the book said it would and she slept through the night from about 8 weeks on. (Actually, she started sleeping through because we let her sleep on her tummy - she would NOT sleep on her back. We did not tell the pediatrician and everything was fine.)

With my 2nd dd, she rebelled against any kind of scheduling attempts on my part. I did finally get her on something like a schedule by 6 months but the first 5 were rough on me.

With Schmooey, I'm doing more of a routine - feed him, let him play and then put him down when he's tired. I don't have time to pay attention to the clock as well as I did with the other two, so he's a little more flexible. I will say that he is not sleeping very well at night right now so I may have to get a little stricter with the schedule. He was sleeping through just fine, but now he wakes up at least 2 times per night and often 3 or 4. It's about to do me in. I'm really not sure what the deal is - it's been going on for a couple of weeks or longer.

Anyway, I loved the plan laid out for me in Babywise. I never denied my kids food, and nursed my second a lot more than I was supposed to and always to sleep. But, just knowing that babies need routines and what to do with them was so helpful to me!

[Kendra]

Don't think I'd know any other way :)

But you asked for a sample schedule, so here's what a newborn's routine might look like (obviously, the times are just examples):

7 a.m.- nurse (usually takes me 30 minutes when they're newborns)
7:30-7:45- awake and diaper change
7:45- put baby down to sleep when baby starts to do those little sleepy grunting noises
9:30 a.m.- nurse
10-10:15- awake (you wake baby)
10:15- sleep
12- nurse
12:30- 12:45- awake
12:45- sleep
2:30- nurse
3-3:15- awake
3:15- sleep
5- nurse
5:30-5:45- awake
5:45- sleep
7:30- nurse
8-8:15- awake
8:15- sleep
10- nurse
10:30-10:45- awake
10:45- DOWN FOR NIGHT (let baby wake up on his/her own)
Baby will probably nurse once or twice in the middle of the night, waking on their own.
Start again in the morning at the time you want to wake baby.

Again, all of the times need to be flexible according to what you and baby need.

Does that help?

[gardenschooler]

I think the main advantage in an approach like this one (vs. nursing before sleep) is that the baby doesn't associate going to sleep with feeding. So when she wakes in the night, she automatically does whatever her little 'going to sleep' ritual is - sucking on a fist, etc.

I read this book a looooong time ago, and while I didn't implement it, I sure did notice that when I got my babies in the habit of nursing before sleep, it was next to impossible to get them to go to sleep without it (or stay asleep).

Of course it's hard in the first few weeks, when they seem to fall asleep every other minute, but I definitely think that trying to put them down awake has big payoffs later! I did this with my firstborn, and then with the other two...I got lazy. And oh, did I pay (with many sleepless nights, waaaay after the newborn stage). I should have stuck to what I was doing before I 'knew' what I was doing! :rolleyes:

[TengoFive]

If your goal is to get your child to sleep through the night, I recommend the "No Cry Sleep Solution" instead of Babywise.

[Tracey in TX]

Babywise was a godsend for me. I followed a fairly structured schedule, but was not rigid. Babies go through repeated growth spurts (the "3,6,9 week and 3,6,9 month" rule of thumb was a good measure) and need extra food and rest.

BW can be a divisive topic depending on your parenting philosophy. It worked well for us, as we believe in the 'family centered' vs. 'child centered' mentality. WHatever works best...

Regarding schedules, we did every 3 hrs until the babies were 10# (approx) and then began skipping nighttime feedings. (This, too, was a godsend with the triplets :)) Begin with a game plan. Once your'e comfortable with it; it'll change!

\Good luck

[WTMindy]

We started the day when dh got up, which was about 6:00 am. Then we proceded to feed about every 3 hours. The last feeding at night was 9:00 PM and then I would feed in the middle of the night whenever they woke up and put them back down. My kids both did beautifully on the schedule, slept through the night at 8 weeks, took great naps, etc. But, like others have said, never put the schedule over common sense.

[kdeno]

I didn't continue following a strict schedule, but yeah, the philosophy of NOT nursing them to sleep was wonderful! I wish I had found it w/ my 1st instead of my 5th :-)

Good luck!


I so agree Peek. I think that is the main gist of the book. I love nursing and cuddling but I also love to sleep so I am not CRABBY!!!

[kdeno]

I remember Secrets of the BabyWisperer was great. I have no idea what is was about, I need to reread it before June but I remember that I gleaned some insight. You can probably request it through your library.

Kari

[Cadam]

Regarding schedules, we did every 3 hrs until the babies were 10# (approx) and then began skipping nighttime feedings.
\Good luck

This was funny to me because my youngest started out at 10 pounds!

[Michelle in MO]

I remember getting a book, I believe it was called "Touchpoints" by Dr. T. Brazelton (I think that's the name), and I remember he also discussed the topic of sleep cycles. Essentially, a newborn's sleep cycle lasts from about 30-45 minutes, then they tend to "stir" and then fall back asleep again. I think that's mostly where Babywise helped me out---recognizing that "midpoint" of their nap and allowing them to settle back down. I'm not saying that Dr. Brazelton advocated a strict 3-hour schedule; I'm just saying that he is a well-respected pediatrician and he recognized this issue regarding sleep cycles. I'm not certain, but I think the newer editions of Babywise may recommend a shorter "schedule" of sorts---perhaps 2-1/2 hours (but, correct me if I'm wrong).

Anyway, I thought I'd throw that in, for what it's worth! :)

[kdeno]

I remember getting a book, I believe it was called "Touchpoints" by Dr. T. Brazelton (I think that's the name), and I remember he also discussed the topic of sleep cycles. Essentially, a newborn's sleep cycle lasts from about 30-45 minutes, then they tend to "stir" and then fall back asleep again. I think that's mostly where Babywise helped me out---recognizing that "midpoint" of their nap and allowing them to settle back down. I'm not saying that Dr. Brazelton advocated a strict 3-hour schedule; I'm just saying that he is a well-respected pediatrician and he recognized this issue regarding sleep cycles. I'm not certain, but I think the newer editions of Babywise may recommend a shorter "schedule" of sorts---perhaps 2-1/2 hours (but, correct me if I'm wrong).

Anyway, I thought I'd throw that in, for what it's worth! :)

That is a good point. I would always go running in because I didn't want my baby to so much as wimper. I hope I do a better job...