Catalyst or Quitter?

[A.J. at J.A.]

Hi!

I am having a lot of trouble with myself lately and I don't know how to view the way I behave. (Okay, was that vague enough for ya?)

Here's my regular M.O.:
1. Get really excited and passionate about something, see that it needs to be done, start it, organize it and then do it for a while, feel trapped and want to quit
EXAMPLES:
a. Was on MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers Steering for many years), became coordinator (head leader) and after 2 years decided time to start a Teen MOPS

b. Became passionate about fundraising to start a new Teen MOPS group (MOPS group specifically for teen mothers) at our church and kind of got backed into leadership of the group. Turned out to be a blessing but stepped down after 2 years (but never really felt "right" about being in leadership of the group). Left it in capable hands and it is still thriving

c. Saw trouble in our Children's ministry in November with getting workers and too many kids combined, offered to not only teach the 1st-3rd grade (so they could be split from the 4yr-K) but to create the curriculum for the entire 4yr-3rd grade group. I didn't think very far ahead, just saw a problem and jumped in to help fix it. The new program (a good friend of mine also helped work on the entire Children's class schedule which has helped a tremendous amount too - incorporating memory verses and prayer time) and we've received a very good response. Now I've committed until June to write the lesson plans and it seems I have an "unspoken" commitment through December. I'm sure it is my fault, and I led them on by never specifying an end date and telling them how excited I was about the curriculum, but now I feel backed into the corner again. For the first time, since I started writing the curriculum (they phased me out of teacher every week in January which was good), I am feeling very overwhelmed and hemmed in. Honestly, I'm sure it is my own fault.

DH (blessed DH) says, I'm a "catalyst" and not a "quitter", although I'm sure others will view me as a quitter. He says I'm an organizer and have "big ideas" that I like to get started...but then they give way to the next "big idea".

I recently started organizing a History Club and kind of got stuck in organizing a Homeschool boys playdate every other week this winter because my church allows us to use the facility for free. Unfortunately, now it is expected and my boys don't really enjoy the playtime...at least they certainly don't want to stay for the entire time, but then I'm stuck because I have to be at the church while everyone is there. (Don't get me wrong, I know this is a good thing, and it is a way to serve the HS community here, I'm just feeling again, like I've hemmed myself in).

Edited to add:
I forgot, DS#1 (9yo) and I are planning on going on our second mission trip to Guatemala this coming July and I need to work on our fundraising for that. That is very important to us both and shouldn't take a back seat to any of the above.

I also forgot to add that I offered to lead our Cub Scout Pack (6 homeschooled boys) in the March den meetings (2) and the pack meeting (1) because we'll be learning about Recycling & Conservation of resources, which are topics I'm passionate about.

ACK! Looking at my list I even think I'm crazy! Tell me what you think (gently please). I will certainly pray about it in greater detail (oh, to find the time for that...but that is another post entirely!). I am planning on seeing how many weeks of curriculum I can crank out this coming Tuesday (my boys attend electives on Tuesdays at a local church) and then see where I'm at.

Thanks for listening...I know this got long. :o
Angela

[OhM]

Some people are gifted in starting new ventures - they have the creativity and enthusiasm to see something from nothing (creators!)

Others don't have the vision or energy to start the venture, but can run it efficiently once it's underway. Visionary people rarely have the patience to last long in this mode - the next great idea is probably percolating and its only a matter of time before they need to be off starting something new.

I think you're identifying something great about yourself - now you can focus your energies in the best way to use your talent! Maybe the trick is to identify the person most likely to keep the project running after you pull away and work in tandem with them when starting a new venture?

[A.J. at J.A.]

Thank you! You put it in such a sweet light! :D DH is very loving too and understands me pretty well. Unfortunately, I fear not everyone will view it that way.

You are right that I need to find the next person to "train" and pass this curriculum planning along too. I saw a need, filled it and now can pass it on so I can become passionate about something else.

[WTMCassandra]

Yah, what OhM said. See, I'm one of the people that would be *thrilled* to take something over that someone *else* figured out.

[WTMCassandra]

Oooh, hey, I'm a level 3 bee now! (Sorry for the interruption.)