Parents, families or friends of homeschoolers with cancer

[Karin]

There is a little girl down our street with a serious case of metasticized sarcoma who is now being homeschooled along with one of her healthy sisters--the sister is being homeschooled because the parents didn't like the middle school she would have had to go to. I posted a prayer request for this little girl a few months ago. They've fought to bring her home where she wants to be, instead of cooped up in the hospital where she missed her home, friends, etc.

I really, really, really want to reach out to these people somehow. The father has always been open and friendly, but the mother is more reserved. I get that, but I would like to invite the middle school dd out sometime or share some group info, sites with them. Without being pushy, and without knowing what they've already done. They do sometmes walk their dd out in a wheelchair to where all the kids play, but I always miss that.

The good news is that they did let me take 2 of the girls out to the park this summer. The bad news is that when we dropped by to visit a couple of times since the girl with cancer came home the mother never talks to us unless we talk to her, just focuses on her daughter. Now, totally understand that she wants to be with her ill dd all the time, and totally respect her need to be private at a time like this, but they did have their other dd's invite kids over to visit at a certain time of the day. But I also think that the older dd might enjoy going to a group activity that her younger sister might not be able to attend.

If I should just not do anything, tell me (nicely, of course.) I know that I can't possible know what they're going through without having been there myself.

[magistramom]

Reach out :grouphug:. You have to at least try :001_smile:. Just be honest about your intentions, and try not to tip-toe. Often parents going through this trial are tired of all of the side-stepping conversations that happen. Those can be TERRIBLY mentally exhausting. Keep it short, honest and focused on the girl you would like to include. Also offer "get together" time for times the family may need to be away for treatments.
:grouphug:

[eaglei]

[QUOTE=magistramom;515130]Reach out :grouphug:. You have to at least try :001_smile:. Just be honest about your intentions, and try not to tip-toe. Often parents going through this trial are tired of all of the side-stepping conversations that happen. Those can be TERRIBLY mentally exhausting. Keep it short, honest and focused on the girl you would like to include. Also offer "get together" time for times the family may need to be away for treatments.
:grouphug:[/QUOTE

I agree with magistramom - try, be honest, be short, and be focused. As the mother of a cancer survivor who is currently undergoing "round two" from having relapsed, I would also add, without being pushy, let her know you are available - then don't be offended or hurt if she doesn't take you up on your offer. Parents of cancer survivors have much to deal with. Just know that she hears you, she understands your concern, and she appreciates it - whether it shows or not. If you are a praying person, the best thing you can do is surround that family in prayer. God makes all the difference.:001_smile:

[Karin]

Thanks for both of your suggestions. I'm going to head over today, give her my phone number and a couple of links to homeschool groups and let her know that she can send her older homeschooled dd over to do school here any time she has to take her younger one for treatment (I think she's done chemo, but may have started another round) or an appointment. Also that I'd be happy to take her to a group activity or to the library. And I won't take it personally (I'll do my best, anyway!) if she says no or never calls. I've always wanted to help, but they've had so many relatives and friends they really haven't had much need yet that I could see, but perhaps now they do.

[Karin]

So, I did it. I went over, gave the mother my phone number and a couple of non-religious support groups (they're Buddist, so she was thankful for the links since she'd mainly found Christian groups). I don't know what will happen, because they're rethinking putting their older on in ps because they don't know where they'll be.