Party dilemma

[klmama]

We have a yearly Independence Day bash at our house, followed by a trip to the park to watch fireworks. There are people we have invited for several years because we used to be in a Bible study with them, but outside of talking at church a little, we really have no other contact with them anymore. I suspect they are expecting an invitation, since they've gotten one three years in a row, and if we don't invite them, some of the other regular guests may ask where they are or may mention it to them. I don't want to hurt their feelings in any way. Dh says we don't have to invite them, but I feel guilty, like I'm rejecting them or something. What would you do?

[Heather in the Kootenays]

I'd invite them because I can't bear to leave people out. I'm sure that's really not a good enough reason but I couldn't not invite them.

[Tammy]

Why do you 'not' want to invite them?

[klmama]

I'd like to invite more families with children that are friends of our dc so they can enjoy the time together, too. A few kids come that are my dc's friends, but there are others that I'd like to invite, too. Space is a consideration, though. When the two families in question come, the number of them coming changes several times, depending on whether or not their 5 kids will come, and if they do, how many will come with friends (their dc don't want to come without their friends, and I've always said yes to letting them so we could enjoy their parents). Whether or not the friends come, their dc pretty much ignore our dc and all the other kids that are here, even those that are close in age to them. That just doesn't feel comfortable to me, and I don't like feeling uncomfortable in my own back yard, KWIM? I'm not used to unsociable children. But... I feel guilty, because I do like the parents, even though we don't do anything socially beyond chatting at church, and they are good friends to a few of the other regular guests. Hence, my dilemma. So, now that you know, what do you think?

[lynn]

You are like me wanting to please everyone. I am working on getting over this big time. I say do your invites and don't worry about it. I know it's easier said than done but your reasoning is valid. It's a family party and if your kids want their friends which limits space then you adjust accordingly. If they choose to be rude about it, their problem not yours.