Should we stay or should we go?

[Mrs Mungo]

When we moved here we didn't have a whole lot of options. It wasn't during the typical moving cycle (which takes place in the summer) and there weren't a ton of open houses. Housing wasn't available and we would have had to live in a hotel for 2 months to make it work. We found this house, loved it, we got a good deal on it (considering) so we took it.

However...

A: The traffic to/from this area is *horrible*. A drive that takes 20 minutes during the day or at night takes hubby an hour during rush hour. Rush hour in the afternoon starts at around 3:30 and lasts until 7 or later. It has taken hubby 2 hours to get home if there is a wreck or something.

B: There isn't much in the community for the kids and I. The neighborhoods are new and the area just hasn't caught up with the housing. A mall and Target and such open next year but in the meantime we have to drive to do anything.

C: It's sort of pricey.

Therefore, we've been considering moving on post late in the summer. It would save us around $1000/month and that's not figuring gas prices from constantly driving all over creation, often in traffic.

When hubby brought up buget issues I thought I had him talked into moving until we went and looked at the housing in question. It was built in WWI. They are historical homes. They are smaller than our current house but it would be workable. The layout is a little awkward and they only have one full bath (although there is a second toilet and shower in the back part of the house that was once servants' quarters) and no garage. We would probably have to rent a storage unit for our holiday decorations, school stuff we're not currently using and stuff like that. BUT to hubby-the fact that they are smaller, older, not as nice, no garage, etc is a *huge* downside. The upside being-easier community for the kids and I to make friends in, easier access to activities, less driving for the kids and I as well as hubby. It would take him 30 minutes, maximum to get to and from work.

Help me puzzle this out and possibly help me present my argument to hubby on why we should still move.

[Amy loves Bud]

I understand not wanting to give up the "luxuries" of your current home. But the upside, both financially and community-wise would definitely sway me to move. Having my husband home more because of a shortened commute would almost be enough in and of itself.

If this were going to be your forever home, then I might be more hesitant. But clearly you guys will have to move again, so I'd go for the move and take advantage of the opportunity for serious decluttering!

Good luck with your decision!

[LizzyBee]

Maybe it's because I'm an extrovert, but access to community and friends is enough for me to vote in favor of moving.

When I lived in Okinawa, some of our friends lived in some housing that was closed after new housing was built. Their kitchen floor in the old housing was sloped! The housing at your base can't be any worse than that (I hope!). :001_smile:

[umarider]

We started out living off-base, too. We enjoyed some aspects of our rental house like being close enough to walk our kayaks to the bay, but like you, there were no kids around and that plus some other things really took a toll on us. We made the decision to move on base. Old house, but probably not as old as what you spoke of (late '40s?). Smaller, no garage, all the bugs that go along w/ older base housing. But we realized after we moved that we are soooo much happier. There are other kids in the neighborhood, commute for dh is about the same, but family life is much more relaxed. I didn't realize just how much the rental house was stressing us out until we moved away. Another good point is being able to run AC as needed instead of fretting about the electric bill... this is especially nice when we've got "Kona's" blowing and the vog is so bad!

I know a lot of the bases on Oahu are building new housing, especially Navy and USMC. Any chance of getting into a new house if you just wait a bit? We tried to wait for one of the new houses, but our lease was up and the house was being put on the market, so we had to take what was offered. The new houses came available 1 month after we moved:001_rolleyes:.

A lot of people here who have older housing have installed sheds to store extra stuff. That might be an option.

Another point is that living closer to work/shopping/activities will mean less gas $$. Good luck with the decision.

[Mrs Mungo]

We started out living off-base, too. We enjoyed some aspects of our rental house like being close enough to walk our kayaks to the bay, but like you, there were no kids around and that plus some other things really took a toll on us. We made the decision to move on base. Old house, but probably not as old as what you spoke of (late '40s?). Smaller, no garage, all the bugs that go along w/ older base housing. But we realized after we moved that we are soooo much happier. There are other kids in the neighborhood, commute for dh is about the same, but family life is much more relaxed. I didn't realize just how much the rental house was stressing us out until we moved away. Another good point is being able to run AC as needed instead of fretting about the electric bill... this is especially nice when we've got "Kona's" blowing and the vog is so bad!

We don't have the vog out here so bad as other parts of the island. I thought maybe my son had started coughing again (he has asthma that shows itself with coughing) because of it but now I'm sick and coughing and have no voice so I think he has a cold. I know what you mean about running the a/c though, our electric bill is just plain crazy and I don't run the a/c that much during the day.

I know a lot of the bases on Oahu are building new housing, especially Navy and USMC. Any chance of getting into a new house if you just wait a bit? We tried to wait for one of the new houses, but our lease was up and the house was being put on the market, so we had to take what was offered. The new houses came available 1 month after we moved:001_rolleyes:.

According to what housing is telling us (although I'm sure you know how that goes) they could definitely have one of the older homes ready for us by August (which is kind of our target since hubby will be gone a good bit of June and July and we have visitors scheduled in July) but one of the newer homes could be up to a year wait.

A lot of people here who have older housing have installed sheds to store extra stuff. That might be an option.

Yes, when we drove around we noted lots of sheds in the back but I'd be kind of afraid anything other than yard tools would get ruined because there wasn't space for a big shed, these were those little skinny sheds. But even then, renting a storage unit isn't close to the $1000+/month we'd be saving.

Another point is that living closer to work/shopping/activities will mean less gas $$. Good luck with the decision.

Yes, that is a good point as well!

I'm also an extrovert and the lack of community is hurting me (probably why I'm here so much lately, poor y'all, having to put up with me, lol).

And thanks, everyone! :) Just need to get my ducks in a row for setting up the debate with hubby (who is really the creature-comfort guy and doesn't want to move out of our current house).

[gardenschooler]

If you really are in need of more people and community around you, I'd stress that. Appeal to his emotions. :)

And old houses have charm. Our house is almost 100 years old! Dh won't live anywhere that doesn't have hardwood floors and radiator heat. The older, the better. It automatically solves your clutter issues - there is no choice but to pare down.

Good luck - I hope you end up wherever you'll be happiest, although we don't want you here any less, Mrs. Mungo!

[elegantlion]

For a 1000.00 a month, I do it. I understand about having to drive, we are in a great neighborhood, but no one is home during the day and we can't walk anywhere. We don't even have a car during the day, UGH!

If you did nothing but save that 1000.00 a month think about how far ahead you'd be in the future.

[Jenny in Atl]

I'm also an extrovert and the lack of community is hurting me (probably why I'm here so much lately, poor y'all, having to put up with me, lol).

Sounds like you already have your answer. Quality of life is so much more important than the quality of the house. You all make it a home not matter the shell. But if the outside is lacking, no friends, long commutes, than that just makes it all the harder.

Hoping you find happiness no matter what you all choose to do.

[Mrs Mungo]

Thanks, everyone :)

I think it helped clarify the issue. There are downsides but I think for me it weighs in favor of moving. Except the bit where I have to actually pack and move. :glare::lol:

[Brigitte]

Except the bit where I have to actually pack and move. :glare::lol:

Yep. I told dh today that I wish I was Samantha on Bewitched. Then I could just wiggle my nose and everything would be packed. Another wiggle and it would all be moved. :D

[Andie]

Thanks, everyone :)

I think it helped clarify the issue. There are downsides but I think for me it weighs in favor of moving. Except the bit where I have to actually pack and move. :glare::lol:

You've got it all figured out, but *I* have had that song (http://youtube.com/watch?v=0Ag8J2NMYmc) stuck in my head all day, now! ;)


Sounds like the move will be a good one. *twitch* (Sorry. It's the M word.)

[Mrs Mungo]

You've got it all figured out, but *I* have had that song (http://youtube.com/watch?v=0Ag8J2NMYmc) stuck in my head all day, now! ;)

I LOVE THAT SONG! DH says I like any song where I get to yell "OW!!!" or "WOO!"

[Shelly in MD]

Thanks for posting this question! You were able to more accurately ask the question I was asking in my why-should-I-love Baltimore thread. My main issue, I believe, is the need for community and friends, and I just don't have it here. Perhaps I can move to a different part of the Baltimore suburbs and be more content, but this area just isn't working for me. Plus, I don't love my house, so it makes it a no-brainer! :lol:

Thanks for posting this; it helps me with my impending decisions, too.

And, if I were you, yes, I'd move. The longer you stay somewhere you dislike, the more entrenched you can become, without ever really loving it, KWIM? In addition to the social side, the $$ would be a factor for me.

Good luck!

Shelly

[Debbie in OR]

I grew up a military "brat" and by far, one of my most favorite living situations, was the rotation when we lived on post. I was 13-15 at the time, and it was great having friends who lived the same "sub-culture"...And, besides, we could all understand all those abbreviations the military is so fond of using.

And we also lived in WWII housing...but since everyone else had the same housing, it was like having to wear a uniform at private school...it was relieving to not have to keep-up-with-the-Joneses. FWIW...

[Mrs Mungo]

I grew up a military "brat" and by far, one of my most favorite living situations, was the rotation when we lived on post. I was 13-15 at the time, and it was great having friends who lived the same "sub-culture"...And, besides, we could all understand all those abbreviations the military is so fond of using.

Yes, many of her friends are military kids who already live where we would be moving.

And we also lived in WWII housing...but since everyone else had the same housing, it was like having to wear a uniform at private school...it was relieving to not have to keep-up-with-the-Joneses. FWIW...

That's how I see it! Almost everyone lives in housing. So it's not perfect, it's *Army housing* who cares?!

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

Yes, many of her friends are military kids who already live where we would be moving.



That's how I see it! Almost everyone lives in housing. So it's not perfect, it's *Army housing* who cares?!

Unless it's so tiny that you can't function or turn around, move onto post!

[Elaine]

Thanks, everyone :)

I think it helped clarify the issue. There are downsides but I think for me it weighs in favor of moving. Except the bit where I have to actually pack and move. :glare::lol:

I wish I lived closer, I would help you pack. I like packing, you get to use that fancy-schmancy packing tape dispenser!

:lol:

[Mrs Mungo]

Pam-If I can believe the floorplans our currrent house is just over 2400 sf (well, plus an extra room tacked on to the garage) and the other house is just over 2100 sf. The only problem *I* forsee with the other house is the bathroom issue. Here, take a look:
Floorplan and photos for house (http://www.armyhawaiifamilyhousing.com/become_resident/tour/canby/canbyhomes.asp) it is the first house listed on that page. You can see the floorplan and photos. It's a bit awkward in its layout. The "fourth" bedroom is really two tiny rooms with a shower in between them. I was thinking this might be good for eldest. We could set up a room for sleeping and one for hanging out or studying but it might *still* be small. We also gave eldest her own room with a queen bed with the understanding it would be the guest room as needed. If it's super-small that could be an issue. Hubby thinks the guest room should be nice but I'm of the opinion if people are coming for a free visit to Hawaii they can make do or stay in a hotel, I'm not running a B&B!

I wish I lived closer, I would help you pack. I like packing, you get to use that fancy-schmancy packing tape dispenser!

:lol:

Hey, I have *two* fancy tape dispensers, there's free room and board in Hawaii in it for you! ;)

[Elaine]

Pam-If I can believe the floorplans our currrent house is just over 2400 sf (well, plus an extra room tacked on to the garage) and the other house is just over 2100 sf. The only problem *I* forsee with the other house is the bathroom issue. Here, take a look:
Floorplan and photos for house (http://www.armyhawaiifamilyhousing.com/become_resident/tour/canby/canbyhomes.asp) it is the first house listed on that page. You can see the floorplan and photos. It's a bit awkward in its layout. The "fourth" bedroom is really two tiny rooms with a shower in between them. I was thinking this might be good for eldest. We could set up a room for sleeping and one for hanging out or studying but it might *still* be small. We also gave eldest her own room with a queen bed with the understanding it would be the guest room as needed. If it's super-small that could be an issue. Hubby thinks the guest room should be nice but I'm of the opinion if people are coming for a free visit to Hawaii they can make do or stay in a hotel, I'm not running a B&B!



Hey, I have *two* fancy tape dispensers, there's free room and board in Hawaii in it for you! ;)

Sooo tempting!:D

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

Pam-If I can believe the floorplans our currrent house is just over 2400 sf (well, plus an extra room tacked on to the garage) and the other house is just over 2100 sf. The only problem *I* forsee with the other house is the bathroom issue. Here, take a look:
Floorplan and photos for house (http://www.armyhawaiifamilyhousing.com/become_resident/tour/canby/canbyhomes.asp) it is the first house listed on that page. You can see the floorplan and photos. It's a bit awkward in its layout. The "fourth" bedroom is really two tiny rooms with a shower in between them. I was thinking this might be good for eldest. We could set up a room for sleeping and one for hanging out or studying but it might *still* be small. We also gave eldest her own room with a queen bed with the understanding it would be the guest room as needed. If it's super-small that could be an issue. Hubby thinks the guest room should be nice but I'm of the opinion if people are coming for a free visit to Hawaii they can make do or stay in a hotel, I'm not running a B&B!





Wee-elll, I'm the wrong person to ask. You're in paradise. You'd get free housing. You're in a community. That's a GREAT place. My last Army housing was five of us in less than 1000 sq. ft -- they included the furnace/water heater room in the square footage, and had this loooong entry way that was... erm... less than useful, but made up part of the published square footage. It was a duplex. Dead grass. Destined to be torn down, so nobody wanted to really fix anything. Directly on the flight line of the adjoining AFB. It was AWFUL. Four streets down was Air Force housing. It was decidedly NOT awful, and we got to look at it every day on the way out of the neighborhood.

Move, darlin'. You can't beat the price, and you're going to make it fabulous inside, weird or not.

[Mrs Mungo]

Wee-elll, I'm the wrong person to ask. You're in paradise. You'd get free housing. You're in a community. That's a GREAT place. My last Army housing was five of us in less than 1000 sq. ft -- they included the furnace/water heater room in the square footage, and had this loooong entry way that was... erm... less than useful, but made up part of the published square footage. It was a duplex. Dead grass. Destined to be torn down, so nobody wanted to really fix anything. Directly on the flight line of the adjoining AFB. It was AWFUL. Four streets down was Air Force housing. It was decidedly NOT awful, and we got to look at it every day on the way out of the neighborhood.

I know the feeling. Our housing in Germany had a leaky roof that caused mold all over our walls and caused me horrible, horrible allergy problems.

Move, darlin'. You can't beat the price, and you're going to make it fabulous inside, weird or not.

Aw, you are too kind.

OK, now I think I have a comprehensive argument to offer the hubby ;)

[Andie]

OK, now I think I have a comprehensive argument to offer the hubby ;)


??:confused:?? *We* said so isn't good enough? PAM said so, ferpetesake!

Tell him about the freakin' flamin' sword! (Or the icy thermometer. You'll know which will motivate him more. Heh.)

[Reesegirl]

If it were me, I would move for the more friendly community and also gas is so crazy that to be on the road so long every evening has to crunch up a lot of $$$ at the pump. It would be nice to have your hubby home earlier too! Reese

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

??:confused:?? *We* said so isn't good enough? PAM said so, ferpetesake!

Tell him about the freakin' flamin' sword! (Or the icy thermometer. You'll know which will motivate him more. Heh.)

LOL, NOOOoooooo! She just found a convenient place to hint broadly that she's compiling all of our arguments into a comprehensive whole, and now she's ready to be all persuasive. (How come I can never spell "persuasive" without about three tries, at least?)

:lol:

[Mrs Mungo]

??:confused:?? *We* said so isn't good enough? PAM said so, ferpetesake!

Tell him about the freakin' flamin' sword! (Or the icy thermometer. You'll know which will motivate him more. Heh.)

THE HIVE MIND SAID SO, HUBBY, JUST DO IT!!! :lol:

[Angela in TN]

This dosen't really add anything to the conversation except to say I have fond memories of living on base as a kid (my dad was career marine). That is all :)

[DIY-DY]

Perhaps lobby to take the extra grand a month and split it between savings (yay!) and splurging (yay-yay) - are there any trips you all want to take while you're there? Things you want to see? Speciality things you want to do? There's the cold, hard cash for it. Talk about luxury items, eh? Yeah, that'd be my pom-pom routine, right there. :tongue_smilie:

And the gas money would probably get spent on Really Yummy Food. But then, that's me. I'm a weirdo for the food.

FWIW, we had our third child while living in campus housing. It was 1940's Army-built housing - cinderblock construction, with no insulation and all the original single pane windows. 700'sq. - wowsa! It wasn't luxurious, but being able to load up the wagon and walk to evening events was a huge bonus. Having hubby home earlier in the day was also fantastic. Dependable utility bills, great proximity to everything, and the awesome back yard all helped make it bearable. I have two words for surviving a downsize: Vertical Space. It is your best friend!!

So, yeah, definitely, I'd go for it. In a heartbeat.

Good luck making the decision, though. I know not everyone sees things the same. ;)

[Brigitte]

Mrs. Mungo,

Did you notice that the Canby Stucco's dining room has no door? I was checking out the floor plans (I love looking at stuff like that) and I noticed there was no way to get into the dining room. Also, the only way to get from the living room to the kitchen is through the patio.

:D

[Mrs Mungo]

Mrs. Mungo,

Did you notice that the Canby Stucco's dining room has no door? I was checking out the floor plans (I love looking at stuff like that) and I noticed there was no way to get into the dining room. Also, the only way to get from the living room to the kitchen is through the patio.

:D

We actually only qualify for the woods, not the stuccos (those are reserved for key personnel like Battalion commanders and such) but it is hilarious the dining (or is it dinning? ;) ) room has no way in!

[*anj*]

I thought that house was adorable. Are you saying that the one we can view on that website isn't the actual house you'd be living in though? Like it's just a "floor model"?
Either way here's one more vote in favor of moving.
You could always print out each of our responses, cut them into little strips, and leave them around the house where dh will find them. Bombard the guy!! ;)

[Mrs Mungo]

I thought that house was adorable. Are you saying that the one we can view on that website isn't the actual house you'd be living in though? Like it's just a "floor model"?

Right, it's just an example. Some of them are...well...a less attractive color. ;)

Either way here's one more vote in favor of moving.
You could always print out each of our responses, cut them into little strips, and leave them around the house where dh will find them. Bombard the guy!! ;)

:lol:

[clwcain]

I'll preface this by noting that I am not now, nor have I ever been, in a military housing situation.

That said, my family and I currently occupy a ~1500 sq. ft. one-story house. We have one full bath and one half bath. In addition to my wife and children, we're currently housing my f-i-l and my brother.

We have not found demands on the single bathroom to be a problem, although it does require coordination and good humor. ;)

While your husband may have very different priorities, from my POV if I had to give up ~400 sq. ft. to save ~$1000/month + utilities + petrol + shorter commute + etc., I'd look very seriously at it.

Do consider, though, whether that $1000/month is gross or net savings. Will it be offset by other expenses in some fashion (reduced off-base living allowance or some such)?

[Mrs Mungo]

I'll preface this by noting that I am not now, nor have I ever been, in a military housing situation.

That said, my family and I currently occupy a ~1500 sq. ft. one-story house. We have one full bath and one half bath. In addition to my wife and children, we're currently housing my f-i-l and my brother.

We have not found demands on the single bathroom to be a problem, although it does require coordination and good humor. ;)

One of my concerns with the bathroom is the issue of privacy with kids who are heading into adolescence. But...I agree that it's manageable. Just one of the things I was considering.

While your husband may have very different priorities, from my POV if I had to give up ~400 sq. ft. to save ~$1000/month + utilities + petrol + shorter commute + etc., I'd look very seriously at it.

Do consider, though, whether that $1000/month is gross or net savings. Will it be offset by other expenses in some fashion (reduced off-base living allowance or some such)?

Our housing allowance is a set amount. We currently pay (in rent that is slightly above our housing allowance plus the utilities) $1000/month out of pocket over and above out housing allowance. If we move into base housing we won't get the housing allowance, it comes out automatically as rent and we don't pay utilities (unless we have excessive useage which I don't think will be a problem).

I talked to him last night and I think I have him talked into moving but not until September. He doesn't want me moving by myself and he's going to be gone off and on (back and forth various places) until the end of August. Thanks, everyone! :)

[Brigitte]

Right, it's just an example. Some of them are...well...a less attractive color. ;)

When I was stationed in Homestead, FL all the base housing was painted in pastel, tropical colors. A new base commanding officer came in and decided that all the housing needed to be painted in colors found in nature. So, all the housing was painted in various shades of brown. That place went from fun and colorful, to dull and boring, then to flat in no time. Hurricane Andrew came through about a year after all that wasteful painting was done and flattened everything.

Since all the houses were the same style (single story duplexes connected by the carports), you could say "We are the pink house on the right." After the paint job, you had to say "We are the 13th brown house on the right." :lol:

[Mrs Mungo]

When I was stationed in Homestead, FL all the base housing was painted in pastel, tropical colors. A new base commanding officer came in and decided that all the housing needed to be painted in colors found in nature. So, all the housing was painted in various shades of brown. That place went from fun and colorful, to dull and boring, then to flat in no time. Hurricane Andrew came through about a year after all that wasteful painting was done and flattened everything.

Since all the houses were the same style (single story duplexes connected by the carports), you could say "We are the pink house on the right." After the paint job, you had to say "We are the 13th brown house on the right." :lol:

Oh dear, that sounds so typical!

When we were stationed at Ft Irwin one of commanding generals there decided he wanted all the fire hydrants brown. Yeah...the government paid a nice hefty fine to the state of California as a result.

[clwcain]

I'll have to forward the last two comments on to my brother-in-law (Naval Aviator), my f-i-l (retired Coast Guard aviator, my m-i-l (retired Navy), and my brother (contemplating Navy). ;)