Nephew's facebook

[Remudamom]

I have a facebook account just so I can be "friends" with our college kid and see his school goings-on pictures.

My sister told me this morning that her son has a facebook. This boy is 16 and always seems to be in trouble. Not police trouble, just bad grades, disrespectful, etc. He goes to a pricey private school. Parents are divorced, each has had another child, and he fits in no where. It's very sad. We live across country, so I really don't know him at all.

My first thought was to add him as a friend. My second and third and so on thoughts were that I'd see something awful and worry about whether or not to tell his mom. She can't even turn a computer on, and she knows less about FB than I do, and I don't know squat.

WWYD? Add him? Forget it? Cross a rickety bridge when you come to it?

[shell in SC]

I was taken aback (I can't think of the appropriate word. . .appalled, disappointed. . .I dunno) when I saw my dd's (now 17) myspace page!

I have a feeling you would feel the same way if you saw his facebook, so here's my advice. Ask yourself this. . .If you find anything offensive or objectionable are you going to tell his mother (don't know what kind of relationship you have)? If you would then check it out. If it is something that would just bother you and you wouldn't feel comfortable telling his parents then DONT. DO. IT. You will only cause yourself stress and you probably already have enough of that as it is being a parent. You will worry more about it if you see something you don't like. Kids tend to put those things up with the intentions that their parents will never see them, they don't hold much back so be prepared if you decide to look.

GOOD LUCK!
shell

[Cadam]

You could ask his mom if she would like you to check it out, since you are on there. Then, ya, I would tell her if there is potentially dangerous stuff on there. She can't get him help if she doesn't know what is going on in his life. If she doesn't want to know you don't look at all. It would be sad though if she just wanted to stick her head in the sand.