Is father bashing against board rules?

[amy g.]

I really love him, and I think it is great that he is here so much, and is so close to the kids.

I just get tired of picking up after him. He is a grown man, after all.

He uses my washer and dryer on the weekends. If there is a load of our clothes in the dryer, he just dumps them on the couch, where they get all wrinkled. I'm cooking dinner, and holding a fussy baby, waiting for Dh to get home and help. Would it really be that hard to fold them for me?

Last time he was here, I yelled at the kids, and told them that I should only have to wash my own, and the baby's dishes. I noticed that he has washed his own since then.

I kept his cat for 3 weeks so he could go on vacation. Now my Yorkie has fleas, and my daughter is covered in bites. We manage to keep 6 dogs flea free. Why can't he manage one cat?

Someone please tell me how lucky I am that these are the only things I have to complain about.

[Momto4kids]

I really love him, and I think it is great that he is here so much, and is so close to the kids.

I just get tired of picking up after him. He is a grown man, after all.

He uses my washer and dryer on the weekends. If there is a load of our clothes in the dryer, he just dumps them on the couch, where they get all wrinkled. I'm cooking dinner, and holding a fussy baby, waiting for Dh to get home and help. Would it really be that hard to fold them for me?

Last time he was here, I yelled at the kids, and told them that I should only have to wash my own, and the baby's dishes. I noticed that he has washed his own since then.

I kept his cat for 3 weeks so he could go on vacation. Now my Yorkie has fleas, and my daughter is covered in bites. We manage to keep 6 dogs flea free. Why can't he manage one cat?

Someone please tell me how lucky I am that these are the only things I have to complain about.

I would love to have my dad come to my house and do his laundy, it would be a delight for me to see my wrinkly clothes laying on the couch knowing he was at that moment washing his own in my house. I think it is awesome that he feels comfortable in your house.

I wish I could watch his cat for him.

I wish he knew and was close to all my children.

My dad died at 50 years old from cancer 7 years ago. Me, I just wish my dad was here.

On the other hand you do have your hands full and a lot going on, I can understand getting frustrated. I am just looking at it from my standpoint of just wanting my dad here in any one of those situations.

I really hope you don't take offense to this I am just showing you another viewpoint.

[amy g.]

No offense at all. It is what I need to hear. Thanks for saying it.

[Mamagistra]

Someone please tell me how lucky I am that these are the only things I have to complain about.

You are lucky, like Megsmachine said, but I can understand how frustrated you must be....especially the flea thing. :( :ack2:

I hope things improve for you. :001_smile: Can you talk to him or is it futile?

[amy g.]

I could and should talk to him, but I HATE confrontation. I need to just get over it.

I'm really spoiled because my husband helps so much. I expect all men/adults to behave that way.

[Mamagistra]

I could and should talk to him, but I HATE confrontation. I need to just get over it.

I'm really spoiled because my husband helps so much. I expect all men/adults to behave that way.

I hate confrontation, too, especially with family members! :leaving:
It is hard to be honest with loved ones, particularly when one lives (or thinks) very differently from them. :grouphug:

[j.griff]

Ahhh! Lightbulb! And I expect all men to be able to understand conversation about car parts, and to be able to park a Suburban- either backing it into a garage, or parallel parking on the street. :D I AM spoiled, and have come to understand that all men do not possess Suburban parking abilities. Lotsa hugs, and :cheers2:, it IS the weekend. ;)

[Elisabeth in IL]

I could and should talk to him, but I HATE confrontation. I need to just get over it.

I'm really spoiled because my husband helps so much. I expect all men/adults to behave that way.
I don't think that most men help out all that much unless you ask them to. At least that is my perception. My husband doesn't think to do something unless I ask him to and/or point it out to him. He just doesn't think that way.

[JFS in IL]

My dad drives me nuts, too - but then I see him only every other year when he flies in from S. Calif. to spend a few days, so I can take it. At least your dad is close enough to bug you ;) more often. I miss having my dad around - wish my kids could have had his Grandpaness* as part of their childhood.

* brand new word copyright ME 2008 :)

[Kate CA]

I kept his cat for 3 weeks so he could go on vacation. Now my Yorkie has fleas, and my daughter is covered in bites. We manage to keep 6 dogs flea free. Why can't he manage one cat?



Next time you can use one of your flea meds on his cat and keep it in the garage for two days while the meds work! Then you can watch the cat without any stress. :) Hugs to you!! Thanks for being a kind daughter, even when you don't feel like it. :)

[Kayaking Mom]

You can give it a capstar and all fleas would be dead in 24 hours. Then you have to treat it with something long term, but it's better than fleas.

Yes, parents can be annoying, but I am with the earlier "I wish I saw my dad." My parents live 1800 miles away, I visit a few times a year but I miss them and wished we were closer. My dad's health is failing, so to see him carry laundry would be a huge deal. Hug your dad. At least for the rest of us. :)

[GVA]

My parents both have age-related dementia and are holed up in their house, just communicating with a few select people on their terms. I'm not one of them.

Enjoy him while you can!

[Valerie(TX)]

Next time you can use one of your flea meds on his cat and keep it in the garage for two days while the meds work!

:scared: I don't think you can do that. There are some of the Frontline-type meds that cannot be used on cats, unless you specifically get the kind made for cats.

Hope that helps!

Valerie

[Free Indeed]

I would love to have my dad come to my house and do his laundy, it would be a delight for me to see my wrinkly clothes laying on the couch knowing he was at that moment washing his own in my house. I think it is awesome that he feels comfortable in your house.

I wish I could watch his cat for him.

I wish he knew and was close to all my children.

My dad died at 50 years old from cancer 7 years ago. Me, I just wish my dad was here.

On the other hand you do have your hands full and a lot going on, I can understand getting frustrated. I am just looking at it from my standpoint of just wanting my dad here in any one of those situations.

I really hope you don't take offense to this I am just showing you another viewpoint.

:iagree: I lost my dad to cancer at 14. I know God was in control the whole time, but I wish my kids and hubby could have met him and he met them. :sad: It sounds VERY aggravating. It is esay for me to say I am not dealing with it- but I would happily deal with it for one more day with him. :001_smile:

[GreenKitty]

As my parents get older I notice things seem to change, as in they are the ones who need to be taken care of. Maybe you can wash his cat and put a flea collar on it. Have the kids fold the laundry? I would mention, to him, the things that are 'really important' to you. The rest I would let go. I hope it all works out.