So, today I realized that I am starving my kids....

[Kelli in TN]

Really, I am.

I set everything aside for the last couple of days, even making a major mistake concerning the 4H Club I colead, to teach my ten year old to sew.

I was a little taken back by her reaction.

All we did was follow squiggly lines I drew on paper, then we progressed to stitches on scraps and then we progressed to making a very simple purse from some scrap denim and an old rainbow belt for the handle.

She keeps coming up to me and hugging and kissing me. Its as s if I have given her a million dolllars.

I have sacrificed the important on the altar of the urgent. Bad choice.

My kids are truly not getting enough of me. I cannot wait to shake free of my obligations. By the end of June I will simply be a mom. The only person outside my family who will get anything from me beyond friendship will be my bonus student.

I cannot wait.

[j.griff]

How wonderful! Enjoy every minute of it!

[Jean in Newcastle]

Our kids really are our most important ministry and most important mission. What a wonderful gift you are giving your daughter and other children.

[Whisperlily]

Kelli, what a blessing you are to your children.

I am glad you're able to cut back soon, and BE Mom for a while. What a neat reminder that it's the small things that are big in the grand scheme of things.

Having said that, don't think of this time period as having "starved" your children. I just want to encourage you to look back on this time as a chance for them to really appreciate the things you do, and the time you *do* get to share with them. You weren't starving them, Kelli... you were whetting their appetite. Haven't you ever had a satisfying meal, and afterward said..."Wow, I didn't know I was hungry!"

I'm sure they don't feel starved in the slightest. :) And it seems you could say the same for your desire to be with them. That's what makes it even more special.

:grouphug:

[Diana in OR]

Really, I am.

My kids are truly not getting enough of me. I cannot wait to shake free of my obligations. By the end of June I will simply be a mom. The only person outside my family who will get anything from me beyond friendship will be my bonus student.

I cannot wait.

That's one thing I love about summer. I get to be "just" a mom. :)

[gandpsmommy]

Kelli, I'm so happy for you. I've noticed lately how important seemingly little things are to my two kiddoes, like getting off the computer to play Ring Around The Rosy with them. I didn't even know my 6.5yo would still want to play this kind of game! But they thought it was the greatest that Mommy was giving them her full attention and doing something fun. Your post has reminded me how important it is to give our kids attention and do something with them. Thanks. I really needed a reminder.

[melissel]

Kelli, what a blessing you are to your children.

I am glad you're able to cut back soon, and BE Mom for a while. What a neat reminder that it's the small things that are big in the grand scheme of things.

Having said that, don't think of this time period as having "starved" your children. I just want to encourage you to look back on this time as a chance for them to really appreciate the things you do, and the time you *do* get to share with them. You weren't starving them, Kelli... you were whetting their appetite. Haven't you ever had a satisfying meal, and afterward said..."Wow, I didn't know I was hungry!"

I'm sure they don't feel starved in the slightest. :) And it seems you could say the same for your desire to be with them. That's what makes it even more special.

:grouphug:

Great post.

Congratulations, Kelli. Good for you for making this decision. You're such a good mom for recognizing the need and acting to address it.

[Laura in VA]

I picked up The Heart of Homschooling from my bookshelf last night and began reading it again. Boy, was I convicted. Thank you for the reminder of what is really important!
:)

[Laura in VA]

Kelli, what a blessing you are to your children.

I am glad you're able to cut back soon, and BE Mom for a while. What a neat reminder that it's the small things that are big in the grand scheme of things.

Having said that, don't think of this time period as having "starved" your children. I just want to encourage you to look back on this time as a chance for them to really appreciate the things you do, and the time you *do* get to share with them. You weren't starving them, Kelli... you were whetting their appetite. Haven't you ever had a satisfying meal, and afterward said..."Wow, I didn't know I was hungry!"

I'm sure they don't feel starved in the slightest. :) And it seems you could say the same for your desire to be with them. That's what makes it even more special.

:grouphug:

Thank you!

[Kelli in TN]

Thanks for the encouragement, y'all.

This has been such a hard year. I have been so stressed out serving as coleader of 4H that I never had enough reserves left to help my kids with their own 4H projects. I realized this when my son was working on his portfolio this past week and had to leave large sections blank because we just didn't get stuff done. Did we join 4H for me, or for them?

And I love teaching Bible to my class at church, but frankly I have altogether stopped teaching Bible to my kids, opting instead to get through the "important" subjects first and always running out of time.

School has become boring and unmemorable. I hate that. But we always have to hurry because we have someplace to be every afternoon of the week.

And then I just miss feeling relaxed and calm enough to just "be" with the kids. I can't think of the last time we hung out together and just liked being around each other. Until the last few days when I ignored all my obligations and just taught my daughter to use a sewing machine.

I am definately ready for some margins in my life.

[MichelleWI]

When this thread is ready to slip away into Neverland, save what you have written and the replies you have appreciated. Print them and put them in an envelope marked "Why Should I Say 'NO' To This Responsibility?" and refer to it whenever necessary. :)

[Mom2legomaniacs]

What a revelation! I am so glad you experienced this moment with your dd. It is wonderful, isn't it? I cut out everything this year and am working on simplifying. Let me just say that I have discovered that I am content with me now. I mean I am content with just being at home with my kids and not running away to other places to "find myself". (not saying this is what you are doing at all -- just saying what I have been going through lately) I am at peace with my decision to cut out all the things that I was running away to.

I hope you feel similarly when all the extras are done.
blessings!

[Jackie in AR]

Thanks for the encouragement, y'all.

This has been such a hard year. I have been so stressed out serving as coleader of 4H that I never had enough reserves left to help my kids with their own 4H projects. I realized this when my son was working on his portfolio this past week and had to leave large sections blank because we just didn't get stuff done. Did we join 4H for me, or for them?

And I love teaching Bible to my class at church, but frankly I have altogether stopped teaching Bible to my kids, opting instead to get through the "important" subjects first and always running out of time.

School has become boring and unmemorable. I hate that. But we always have to hurry because we have someplace to be every afternoon of the week.

And then I just miss feeling relaxed and calm enough to just "be" with the kids. I can't think of the last time we hung out together and just liked being around each other. Until the last few days when I ignored all my obligations and just taught my daughter to use a sewing machine.

I am definately ready for some margins in my life.

Aww, you've reminded me that I really need to spend time sewing with my dd. She really does enjoy it, but we never get around to it because of all the urgent things that I think are pressing on us.

And we've let Bible slide around here, too, even while dh and I are teaching a Bible class at our church.

Thanks for posting, and giving me some encouragement to do things a little differently.

And I adore the PoG song in your signature; dd and I recently saw them in concert and heard them sing it live. I like the video, too.

[Hikin' Mama]

I've learned alot from you, and I always read your posts when I skim the boards.

:thumbup:

Kim

[~FireFly~]

I cannot agree more! As I look back to last Mother's Day when I started working out of the home again (after 10 yrs) I am realizing that I too am rushed through the day, always going, going, going and ususally for the DSs, but nevertheless...going.

It's time to slow down. Sit and read together. Watch a movie together. Make a meal together.

Thank you all for this wonderful post!

~Stephanie

[Frontier Mom]

My two younger dc's and I did our first 4-H sewing class last Monday. I really appreciated your post because, I too felt it a truly special time!! We had a great time and, on the way home, I told them my favorite part was just hanging out with them.

Thanks for reminding us to keep the vision.

[gardenschooler]

That brings tears to my eyes. Isn't it amazing that after all we do, the only thing they really want is to be with us?

Sew more purses. Childhood is way too short. (Now I'll have that running through my head and think of you when I'm having trouble saying no!)

[Pam "SFSOM" in TN]

Really, I am.

I set everything aside for the last couple of days, even making a major mistake concerning the 4H Club I colead, to teach my ten year old to sew.

I was a little taken back by her reaction.

All we did was follow squiggly lines I drew on paper, then we progressed to stitches on scraps and then we progressed to making a very simple purse from some scrap denim and an old rainbow belt for the handle.

She keeps coming up to me and hugging and kissing me. Its as s if I have given her a million dolllars.

I have sacrificed the important on the altar of the urgent. Bad choice.

My kids are truly not getting enough of me. I cannot wait to shake free of my obligations. By the end of June I will simply be a mom. The only person outside my family who will get anything from me beyond friendship will be my bonus student.

I cannot wait.

EXcellent!

[*anj*]

This is great, Kelli. And an excellent reminder about time. No do-overs, right?:grouphug: