Dd keeps asking to come home for next year

[Cadam]

She is in ps because our relationship became too strained, she was bored w/o people to play with and she is a very challenging and demanding child.

I love her to pieces, but she probably has ADHD and she is very oppositional toward me specifically. She didn't learn almost anything in second grade because she refused to work for me. It ended up ok because she was far enough ahead from K and first grade that she was on grade level in 3rd at the ps but last year was just wasted and negative. I think she might have even been depressed.

There is nothing terrible going on at school. I just think that the "newness" is gone, you know?

She has a wonderful teacher this year and I had sort of planned for her to just stay at this school through 5th grade. The idea of bringing her home makes me tense. I feel like a terrible person!

I have this feeling she is going to change her mind 12 times over the Summer and while I know that ultimately it is up to us as her parents....... I would hate to send her to school if being home could work.

I would prefer she had a classical education and she wouldn't be learning some of those choice words and attitudes she has picked up. She is very peer-dependent and that worries me.

Ultimately I am going to have to make the decision in late Summer when I see how she does at home all day and with doing Latin and Math here. I hate not knowing though! I am a planner and I already have both scenarios planned in my head but the whole thing stresses me out.

[MariannNOVA]

Hi, Christina: I hear you -- my situation is kind of the reverse: dd almost 11 is going to want to return to private school in september -- it creates some issues for me.
I do not particularly care for the 6th grade teacher -- and yes, it's personal. DH and I are toying with the idea of enrolling dd in a 7-12 private school when she is entering 7 and I don't see any point in her spending a year if her former school for 6th grade only to get moved in 7th grade.
I really DO like her former private classical school, but I also really do not like some of the stuff that we would be married to if we go back there.
One of her very very good little friends is likely going to go to the 7-12 school in 7th as well as she has an older brother there in the high school. And that would make DD happy to know that this friend would be there, but I also know that we cannot plan our moves based on the moves of someone else.
And, I DO like to know what is going to happen in advance - and I can juggle multiple scenarios in my head but DH is cannot.
As far as dd -- she is the one I would love to homeschool forever -- she is the model student, an absolute love and so much more receptive to everything than the twins -- who I sent to public school two years ago for just 4 months b/c I couldn't stand their constant refusal to do what we were supposed to be doing...sound familiar? :glare:
So, I hear you -- I have no idea what is going to happen around here.

[AK_Mom4]

I have 2 in public school and 2 that are home schooled, so I understand (a bit!) where you are coming from.

I agree - I think the newness of the school has worn off, and probably also she's a bit jealous of the time you are spending with your other children during the day while she is gone.

I think you have to look at the big picture - has anything changed for her that would make you expect that things would be different if she were at home again?

[Cadam]

I think you have to look at the big picture - has anything changed for her that would make you expect that things would be different if she were at home again?

Well, I think she now realizes that school is required and everyone else does work too, but fundamentally, no, nothing has changed. Weekends are still difficult and w/o continual interaction she goes around annoying everyone just for something to do. She still puts up huge fights about simple chores or directions. She is still oppositional and throws tantrums regularly.

She just really can't come home right now, sigh.

Maybe it will be different in a few months but I have hoped for that for the past 7 years.