Responsibilities in the home -- An informal study on our roles (LOL)

[happymainemom]

I began thinking about the different things that my husband and I do in our home (or out of it) vs. my sister and her family and am really curious how other families share the roles. I sometimes feel that I over-extend myself, but I'm trying to look at the bigger picture to see my chunk. AND understand that I really only have a chunk, not the whole thing! I'm not going to list all I do, but just in general, who handles:

(you, spouse, or share)

making money
paying bills
budgeting
mortgage/loans
home repair/maintenance
banking/investments
taxes
car care
health insurance
scheduling (making/keeping track of)
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above
teaching/school work or homework
discipline (planning and implementing)
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
kids mornings
kids bedtimes
transportation for kids
grocery shopping
laundry
eating at home
eating away (pack lunch, etc)
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)
lawn care/snow cleanup
garden or bed maintenance


I can't think of anything else right now! Copy and paste this into a new thread and the answering should be easy -- except if you notice that you do almost ALL of these things! I claim no responsibility for what happens after that. Just make sure you're not PMSing!

Happymainemom

[Jennifer in MI]

making money - DH
paying bills - ME
budgeting - ME
mortgage/loans - ME
home repair/maintenance - I hire someone after dh tries!! LOL
banking/investments - ME
taxes - DH
car care - DH
health insurance - ME
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - ME
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - BOTH
teaching/school work or homework - ME
discipline (planning and implementing) - Mostly me, but both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - BOTH
kids mornings - BOTH
kids bedtimes - BOTH
transportation for kids - ME
grocery shopping - ME
laundry - BOTH
eating at home - BOTH
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - ME
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - Mostly ME
lawn care/snow cleanup - DH
garden or bed maintenance - DH

[daisychics]

making money - dh
paying bills - me
budgeting - dh/me
mortgage/loans - me
home repair/maintenance -dh
banking/investments - me
taxes - someone else
car care - dh/me
health insurance -dh
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above -me/some dh
teaching/school work or homework -me
discipline (planning -me and implementing - me/dh
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - dh/me
kids mornings - me
kids bedtimes -me/dh helps
transportation for kids - me
grocery shopping -me
laundry - me, me, and me (teaching ds now)
eating at home - me(weekdays)/dh (weekends):D
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - me/dh (for himself to work)
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - me, currently teaching dc
lawn care/snow cleanup - dh (hiring someone)
garden or bed maintenance - huh? we're suppose to do that too? :tongue_smilie: I killed a cactus once, my sister left it with me to take care of.....:confused:

[RoughCollie]

DH making money
DH paying bills
--- budgeting (DH handles the money but doesn't make budgets)
DH mortgage/loans
Me home repair/maintenance
DH banking/investments
Both taxes (I make spreadsheets with the info and DH takes it to his CPA)
DH car care
Me health insurance
Me scheduling (making/keeping track of)
Me phone calls or correspondence re: all the above
Me teaching/school work or homework
Me discipline (planning and implementing)
Me spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
Me kids mornings
Me kids bedtimes
Both transportation for kids (DH drives them to school, I pick them up & take them everywhere else)
Me grocery shopping
Me laundry
Me eating at home
Me eating away (pack lunch, etc)
Me daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)
Me lawn care/snow cleanup
Me garden or bed maintenance

[Ferdie]

making money - DH
paying bills - me
budgeting - both but I update it
mortgage/loans - none we are completely debt free - yeah!
home repair/maintenance - DH or handyman
banking/investments - DH
taxes - DH
car care - DH
health insurance - not sure what this means, we have health ins through my DH work and I take the kids to the doctor if needed
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - both
teaching/school work or homework - me
discipline (planning and implementing) - both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - both
kids mornings - my kids are older so they do what needs to be done
kids bedtimes - DH
transportation for kids - me during week, DH helps on weekend
grocery shopping - me
laundry - me
eating at home - me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - me, I oversee a chore chart
lawn care/snow cleanup - DH
garden or bed maintenance - family

[JudoMom]

making money dh
paying bills dh
budgeting dh
mortgage/loans dh
home repair/maintenance share
banking/investments dh
taxes dh
car care dh
health insurance it's through dh's work, but we both deal with them
scheduling (making/keeping track of) me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above share
teaching/school work or homework me
discipline (planning and implementing) share
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") share
kids mornings me
kids bedtimes me
transportation for kids me
grocery shopping me
laundry me
eating at home me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) me
lawn care/snow cleanup dh
garden or bed maintenance dh

[Virginia Dawn]

making money- spouse
paying bills- currently spouse, but I have had this duty in the past
budgeting- share
mortgage/loans-these are in both our names, paid through direct deduct
home repair/maintenance- share but mostly dh or hired help
banking/investments- spouse
taxes- our wonderful tax man
car care- mostly spouse
health insurance - spouse, retired military insurance
scheduling (making/keeping track of)- Family and home:me, work: spouse
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above- share
teaching/school work or homework- all me
discipline (planning and implementing)- mostly me, dh is getting better at it. ;)
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")- shared but tipped toward me
kids mornings- all me
kids bedtimes- mostly me, unless I am not home or a little one has developed a sudden overwhelming desire to have Daddy do everything for him. Dh does help with little boys baths.
transportation for kids- mostly me, but dh helps if he can.
grocery shopping- mostly me, I like it that way. Dh picks up milk and last minute items.
laundry- me and kids
eating at home- all me
eating away (pack lunch, etc)- me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)- mostly me and kids
lawn care/snow cleanup- mostly dh and older boys
garden or bed maintenance- shared

*Taking out the trash- dh and older boys
*Taking the garbage to the dump-dh
*Cheering, giving encouragement and pats on the back- mostly dh
*Introducing a little levity into life- mostly dh

[Lorna in the boonies]

making money -- dh
paying bills -- me
budgeting -- me
mortgage/loans -- me
home repair/maintenance -- dh
banking/investments -- me
taxes -- me
car care -- dh
health insurance -- neither
scheduling (making/keeping track of) -- me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above -- share
teaching/school work or homework -- me
discipline (planning and implementing) -- share
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") -- share
kids mornings -- me
kids bedtimes -- share
transportation for kids -- share
grocery shopping -- mostly me
laundry -- me
eating at home -- me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) -- me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) -- me
lawn care/snow cleanup -- dh
garden or bed maintenance -- don't have one

[angela in ohio]

Me-
banking/investments (dh works during bank hours, and the investments are through my mother's firm, so I talk to her more)
taxes (I used to do taxes, so I do them, although dh keeps me on schedule)
health insurance (I take dc to the doctor, so I am pretty much in charge of this, too)
scheduling (making/keeping track of)
teaching/school work or homework (dh has oversight, I do day-to-day)
garden or bed maintenance
transportation for kids
grocery shopping
laundry (actually, dd does, but I supervise)
eating at home
eating away (pack lunch, etc)
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)

Dh-
car care
making money
paying bills
budgeting
mortgage/loans
home repair/maintenance
lawn care/snow cleanup

Both-
discipline (planning and implementing)
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
phone calls or correspondence (depends on what it is, I hate to call people, so dh handles quite a bit)

No One (they do them on their own)-
kids mornings
kids bedtimes

[PariSarah]

making money
Both. Or neither. Or, both, but we both suck at it? :biggrinjester:

paying bills-
Both. I've set a bunch of things to autopay; anything that comes in the mail is "whoever gets to it."

budgeting
I set it up and oversee; we both review it yearly.

mortgage/loans
Me.

home repair/maintenance
Whoever gets to it, but he usually gets to it before I do.

banking/investments
Me.

taxes
Me, up until my sister got her CPA. YAY!!!!

car care
Mostly him.

health insurance
Whoever gets to it.

scheduling (making/keeping track of)
Neither? But I guess mostly him.

phone calls or correspondence re: all the above
Whoever gets to it.

teaching/school work or homework
Whoever's turn it is.

discipline (planning and implementing)
Whoever's turn it is.

spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
Both.

kids mornings
Whoever's turn it is.

kids bedtimes
Whoever's turn it is.

transportation for kids
Whoever's turn it is.

grocery shopping
All me, all the time.

laundry
Whoever gets to it.

eating at home
All me all the time.

eating away (pack lunch, etc)
Whoever's eating it.

daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)
Whoever gets to it, except for cooking (mine) and dishes (his)

lawn care/snow cleanup
Mostly him.

garden or bed maintenance
Mostly me.

[CleoQc]

DH making money
me paying bills
me budgeting
no one mortgage/loans
both home repair/maintenance
me banking/investments
me taxes
DH car care
me health insurance
me scheduling (making/keeping track of)
me phone calls or correspondence re: all the above
me teaching/school work or homework
me discipline (planning and implementing)
me spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
me kids mornings
me kids bedtimes
me transportation for kids
me grocery shopping
me laundry
me eating at home
me eating away (pack lunch, etc)
me daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)
DH lawn care/snow cleanup
DH garden or bed maintenance

[Old Dominion Heather]

You know... we actually have this pretty well worked out, I think! I feel happy! :001_smile:
Me
budgeting
scheduling (making/keeping track of)
teaching/school work or homework
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above
transportation for kids
grocery shopping
eating at home
eating away (pack lunch, etc)
garden or bed maintenance

Him
making money
paying bills
mortgage/loans
banking/investments
taxes
health insurance
kids bedtimes

Both of us
home repair/maintenance
car care
discipline (planning and implementing)
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
kids mornings
laundry
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)
lawn care/snow cleanup

[Jenny in Atl]

making money DH
paying bills Me
budgeting Me.. kinda :tongue_smilie:
mortgage/loans Both
home repair/maintenance Both
banking/investments Both
taxes Both
car care Both
health insurance Both
scheduling (making/keeping track of) Me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above Mostly me but sometime DH
teaching/school work or homework Me with a little help from DH
discipline (planning and implementing) Both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") Our own form... Both

kids mornings M-F Me Both weekends
kids bedtimes same as above
transportation for kids Both
grocery shopping Mostly Me but DH does go often
laundry Me
eating at home Both
eating away (pack lunch, etc) Me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) Me
lawn care/snow cleanup Both
garden or bed maintenance Me

[finding_sanctuary]

making money -- DH
paying bills -- me
budgeting -- me
mortgage/loans -- me
home repair/maintenance -- someone else (if dh's away)
banking/investments -- me
taxes -- someone else
car care -- someone else (if dh's away)
health insurance -- through dh's work, but me if calls/attention needed
scheduling (making/keeping track of) -- me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above -- me
teaching/school work or homework -- me
discipline (planning and implementing) -- me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") n/a
kids mornings -- me
kids bedtimes -- me
transportation for kids --me, sometimes family
grocery shopping -- me
laundry -- me
eating at home -- me, sometimes dh
eating away (pack lunch, etc) --me
daily chores/cleaning -- me
lawn care/snow cleanup -- DSS :D
garden or bed maintenance -- me

Dh works away from home. When he's laid off for more than a few days this changes to something a bit more balanced, but I still handle almost all of the parenting and ALL of the $$ even when he's here. (He's the spender, I'm the saver...it's safer that way!)

[WendyK]

making money - DH
paying bills - Me
budgeting - what is budgeting?
mortgage/loans - DH earns the money, I write out the checks.
home repair/maintenance - We rent.
banking/investments - DH handles investment related stuff.
taxes - Me
car care - we take our own cars for maintenance.
health insurance - DH carries the insurance, I make the appointments/pay the bills.
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - what is scheduling?
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - Me
teaching/school work or homework - Me, except DH teaches German
discipline (planning and implementing) - Mostly Me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - um, we don't practice a religion so there isn't much to carry out there, but we both take on the responsibility of "character" building, which I consider in the same realm
kids mornings - Me
kids bedtimes - DH most of the time.
transportation for kids - Me
grocery shopping - Me
laundry - Me
eating at home - Me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - Me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - Me except garbage, DH takes out the garbage and the recycling
lawn care/snow cleanup - we rent so the landlord does this
garden or bed maintenance - we rent so the landlord does this too

[Alice]

making money- Both
paying bills-Me
budgeting- Me
mortgage/loans- Dh
home repair/maintenance-Dh
banking/investments- Both (different parts)
taxes- Me
car care- Dh mostly, sometimes me
health insurance- Me
scheduling (making/keeping track of)- Me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above- Both
teaching/school work or homework- Me
discipline (planning and implementing)-Both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")-Both
kids mornings-Both
kids bedtimes-Both
transportation for kids-Both
grocery shopping-Both
laundry-Both
eating at home- Mostly me, but he's a better cook and does it fairly often.
eating away (pack lunch, etc)-We each do our own.
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)-Both, I do most of the weekly cleaning but he does a lot of daily jobs like unloading the dishwasher, taking out the trash. We're both "do it if we see it" kind of people.
lawn care/snow cleanup-Dh
garden or bed maintenance-Both

[Plaid Dad]

making money - Share
paying bills - Me
budgeting - Me
mortgage/loans - N/A
home repair/maintenance - The landlords ;)
banking/investments - Me
taxes - Me
car care - Me
health insurance - The Commonwealth of Massachusetts
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - Share
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - Me
teaching/school work or homework - Me, possibly more shared next year
discipline (planning and implementing) - Share
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - Me
kids mornings - Me
kids bedtimes - Share
transportation for kids - Share; me during the day, DW in the evenings
grocery shopping - Share, mostly DW
laundry - Me
eating at home - Mostly DW
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - N/A
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - Me
lawn care/snow cleanup - Mostly landlords, I clear snow off our car
garden or bed maintenance - N/A

[amy g.]

making money Dh
paying bills Dh
budgeting Dh
mortgage/loans Dh
home repair/maintenance Dh
banking/investments Dh
taxes Dh
car care Dh
health insurance Dh
scheduling (making/keeping track of) Me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above Dh
teaching/school work or homework Me
discipline (planning and implementing) Me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") Me
kids mornings Me
kids bedtimes Me
transportation for kids Me
grocery shopping Dh
laundry Both
eating at home Mostly me, Dh on special occasions or to give me a break
eating away (pack lunch, etc) Me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) Me and the kids
lawn care/snow cleanup Dh
garden or bed maintenance Dh

Dh took off work today to do some chores that I have really been needing help with, like building a milk stand for me, and doing some planting.

I'm so happy about it, that I want to offer him a day next month where we all work on helping him get done some things that are important to him.

Maybe the next month I'll get another work day.

[CookieMonster]

ME -- DH -- BOTH
making money
paying bills
budgeting
mortgage/loans
banking/investments
health insurance
home repair/maintenance
taxes - neither, we send them off to Dad who is a tax guru :D
car care
scheduling
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above
teaching/school work or homework
discipline (planning and implementing)
spiritual guidance (sigh)
kids mornings
kids bedtimes
transportation for kids
grocery shopping
laundry
eating at home
eating away
daily chores/cleaning
lawn care/snow cleanup
garden or bed maintenance

Ok, I don't understand what these means
mortgage/loans - um, nothing can be done here without both of our signatures. So?
banking/investments - same here. How could it just be one or the other?
health insurance - do you mean who provides it? Dh with his work. I am the one who knows how to use it though. The man can't even find the card in his wallet.

[nestof3]

making money -- him
paying bills -- me
budgeting -- ???
mortgage/loans -- (you mean opening them? both)
home repair/maintenance -- him
banking/investments -- both (me banking, him investment tracking, me investment deposits)
taxes
car care -- him
health insurance -- me
scheduling (making/keeping track of) -- me (except his business, he does all that)
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above -- (me -- personal & bus., him: customers)
teaching/school work or homework -- me
discipline (planning and implementing) -- both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") -- both
kids mornings -- me (DH leaves early while we sleep in)
kids bedtimes -- both
transportation for kids -- well, we don't have that issue much. near 18 year old drives himself, little ones go wherever I go. During the day, since I'm home with them, obviously it would be me.)
grocery shopping -- both
laundry -- me
eating at home -- me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) -- N/A
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) -- me mostly
lawn care/snow cleanup -- him
garden or bed maintenance -- him (flower garden I enjoy, compost too)

I would like to point you in the direction of the following thread on the same subject:


You will find more elaboration from my perspective about this whole thing. Let me just say that I do not find it very profitable if this becomes some sort of statistical graph because graphs cannot factor in the different lifestyles of those on the board.

http://67.202.21.157/forums/showthread.php?t=14289

[Mrs. H.]

making money- mostly Dh, althought I do some freelance writing when time permits

paying bills- Me

budgeting- I usually make up a sample budget, and we go over it together. All extra money is a joint venture in spending.

mortgage/loans- Both, depending on what's needed.

home repair/maintenance- I do the simple stuff, dh bails me out when I get in over my head, and does the stuff I can't do.

banking/investments- Both

taxes- Me

car care- Dh

health insurance- Both, depending on what's needed

scheduling (making/keeping track of)- Me

phone calls or correspondence re: all the above- Both

teaching/school work or homework- Me

discipline (planning and implementing)- Both

spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")- Me

kids mornings- Me, dh is already at work

kids bedtimes- Both, dh often does baths and stuff, and I tuck them in.

transportation for kids- Both

grocery shopping- Me! Dh would spend a fortune

laundry- Me

eating at home- We all eat at home. :D Oh, you mean the cooking! I (and the dc) do all the cooking, but dh suggests take out and gets it when necessary.

eating away (pack lunch, etc)- Me, dh sort of considers the kitchen "my" room, so he tends to shy away from it. His mother always shoo'ed the kids out of the kitchen.

daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)- Me, but dh will gladly pitch in if I'm sick, tired, have company coming, etc. He also helps get the kids motivated and lined out.

lawn care/snow cleanup- All Dh, baby!

garden or bed maintenance- Both

[Jenny in Florida]

making money -- Hubby
paying bills -- Me
budgeting -- Mostly Hubby, when it gets done at all
mortgage/loans -- Initiating, Hubby. Managing and making the payments, Me.
home repair/maintenance -- We rent, so anything major is taken care of by the rental agency or landlord. I'd say we pretty much split the small stuff.
banking/investments -- Mostly Hubby
taxes -- Both of us
car care -- Mostly me
health insurance -- Can't remember the last time this required thought or effort
scheduling (making/keeping track of) -- Me, me, all me.
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above -- Business stuff, Hubby. Personal stuff, me.
teaching/school work or homework -- Me
discipline (planning and implementing) -- Mostly me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") -- Me
kids mornings -- Me
kids bedtimes -- Shared
transportation for kids -- Me
grocery shopping -- Me
laundry -- Me
eating at home -- Me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) -- Me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) -- Me
lawn care/snow cleanup -- Outsourced
garden or bed maintenance -- N/A

So, it looks like, of the categories you listed that apply to us, my husband is primarily or entirely responsible for 3 of them, we share 5, and I handle the remaining 13.

Hmm. That explains a lot . . .

--Jenny

[Krista in LA]

making money DH
paying bills ME
budgeting ME
mortgage/loans ME
home repair/maintenance SHARE
banking/investments DH
taxes ME
car care SHARE
health insurance ME
scheduling (making/keeping track of) ME
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above DH (I hate calling people)
teaching/school work or homework ME
discipline (planning and implementing) NEITHER? okay, SHARE
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") DH
kids mornings KIDS
kids bedtimes ME
transportation for kids ME
grocery shopping ME
laundry ME but everyone is responsible for sorting and putting away their own
eating at home ME
eating away (pack lunch, etc) ME
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) ME
lawn care/snow cleanup SHARE but DH does more of it
garden or bed maintenance SHARE but DH does more of it

[j.griff]

making money- DH
paying bills- Share
budgeting- Share
mortgage/loans- N/A (we live in military housing)
home repair/maintenance- N/A (free maintenance in military housing)
banking/investments- Share
taxes- DH
car care- DH
health insurance - N/A
scheduling (making/keeping track of)
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above- depends on who's name the account is in, so Share
teaching/school work or homework- Me
discipline (planning and implementing)- Me/Share (I trump DH cause *I* have to live with the *rules* 24/7 and he doesn't)
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")- Me
kids mornings- Me
kids bedtimes- Share (I do it ALL when DH is deployed, so when he's home and home in time at night I leave the bedtime stuff completely to him)
transportation for kids- Me
grocery shopping-Me mostly, every now and then I'll have DH pick something up on his way home- I've done that this week because he is using my truck.
laundry- Me (I do mine and the kids, DH is responsible for his uniforms though)
eating at home- Me/Share (Mostly me, on weekends DH cooks burgers)
eating away (pack lunch, etc)- Me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)- Me (I am trying to get DH to take the trash out every night w/out me needing to remind him, ain't working so well)
lawn care/snow cleanup- N/A
garden or bed maintenance- N/A but that would be Me/Share

[Wendi]

making money (mostly dh, although I have a part-time job temporarily)
paying bills (dh)
budgeting (we do this as a team)
mortgage/loans (discussed together)
home repair/maintenance (dh)
banking/investments (both of us)
taxes (me, using Turbotax)
car care (mostly dh)
health insurance (dh)
scheduling (making/keeping track of) (me)
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above (mostly me)
teaching/school work or homework (me)
discipline (planning and implementing) (me more than dh, just because I'm with ds more, but we do discuss it)
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") (again, me more than dh, just because I'm with ds more)
kids mornings (me)
kids bedtimes (we kinda take turns)
transportation for kids (mostly me)
grocery shopping (me)
laundry (me)
eating at home (me)
eating away (pack lunch, etc) (me)
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) (mostly me, but dh will pitch in)
lawn care/snow cleanup (dh)
garden or bed maintenance (dh)

[Stacia]

making money -- dh
paying bills -- both
budgeting -- both
mortgage/loans -- dh
home repair/maintenance -- both, but dh more often
banking/investments -- dh
taxes -- dh
car care -- dh
health insurance -- dh
scheduling (making/keeping track of) -- me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above -- both
teaching/school work or homework -- me
discipline (planning and implementing) -- both, but me more often
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") -- both
kids mornings -- me during week, both on weekends
kids bedtimes -- both, often dh
transportation for kids -- me
grocery shopping -- dh
laundry -- me
eating at home -- dh
eating away (pack lunch, etc) -- me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) -- both, but mainly me
lawn care/snow cleanup -- both, but dh most often
garden or bed maintenance -- dh

I'll add a few more categories:
travel (as in, planning & taking the kids on trips to visit relatives) -- me
travel (planning for big family vacations) -- dh
pet care -- mainly me, though dh will help once in awhile

[Jean in Newcastle]

making money - Dh
paying bills - me
budgeting - I suppose me - he agrees to it but doesn't stick to it.
mortgage/loans - me
home repair/maintenance - share
banking/investments - me
taxes - me
car care - Dh
health insurance - me
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - me
teaching/school work or homework - me (with some math tutoring from Dh)
discipline (planning and implementing) - share
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - share
kids mornings - me
kids bedtimes - share
transportation for kids - don't do outside activities - we go places as a family
grocery shopping - me
laundry - me
eating at home - me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - 90% me (he does it when he's fed up)
lawn care/snow cleanup - share
garden or bed maintenance - share

[nestof3]

So, it looks like, of the categories you listed that apply to us, my husband is primarily or entirely responsible for 3 of them, we share 5, and I handle the remaining 13.

Hmm. That explains a lot . . .


I was suspecting this would lead to people adding up their duties. I just think it's not as simple as that.

[PrairieAir]

Dh
making money
home repair/maintenance
taxes - I will not touch the taxes!

Me
paying bills
budgeting
scheduling (making/keeping track of)
teaching/school work or homework
kids mornings
kids bedtimes
grocery shopping
laundry
eating at home
eating away (pack lunch, etc)
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)

Share
banking/investments - We don't really have any investments. Occasionally he makes a run to the bank to withdraw or deposit. I choose which bank we use.
car care - I take my car in for maintenance, he takes his truck in.
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - If it has to do with the kids, I usually take care of it. I don't like talking on the phone though, so sometimes I beg him to do it for me:)
discipline (planning and implementing)
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
transportation for kids - We share this responsibility, but I do more of it.
lawn care/snow cleanup - He does more, especially with the landscaping. I don't know how to drive the Bobcat and move all that dirt and rock around. I'm a good laborer and don't mind being told what to do.

mortgage/loans - I'm not sure what you mean here. I make the payments along with the other bills. Dh arranged checks into and makes most of the arrangements for our mortgage and various other loans we have/have had. I also put him in charge of the final decision on insurance, though I've checked into different companies occasionally or said I don't want a specific company or agent. Trying to get the straight scoop and an even comparison from these people and reading all the fine print makes me dizzy. Plus, if I make the decision on something like this, he's sure to ask me details later and I won't remember a thing.

health insurance - We don't have health insurance.
garden or bed maintenance - No garden, flower bed, vegetable beds yet. If we had them, it would be primarily my responsibility once they're put in.

My list looks longer, but he works much harder. I figure the household stuff is mainly my responsibility since he's out busting his butt in construction work. On days he is home because of the weather, he often offers help, but he has other things going. I know he tries to spend as much of those days off doing his biblical studies and so I don't take him up on the offer often, especially not if all I'm doing is playing on the computer;) If I had an outside job, it would be a little different.

[Tami]

making money -- both
paying bills -- dh
budgeting -- both
mortgage/loans -- dh
home repair/maintenance -- dh
banking/investments -- dh
car care -- dh
health insurance -- dh
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - ME
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above -- ME
teaching/school work or homework -- ME
discipline (planning and implementing) -- both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") -- both
kids mornings -- ME
kids bedtimes -- both
transportation for kids -- ME
grocery shopping -- dh
laundry -- both
eating at home -- both
eating away (pack lunch, etc) -- ME
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) -- both
lawn care/snow cleanup -- both

[j.griff]

ITA. DH shoulders THE Responsibility for providing all of our physical needs. He gives his time to the Navy, in order to serve our country AND to provide us with money, food, shelter, etc. He has a LOT of responsibility at work, and then he comes home and puts up with me whining about whatever I whine about, and he does his best to give us all the emotional support that we need- he tries so hard to cover everything and he just doesn't have enough time to do it all (family time, individual time with each family member, do his job well, take care of auto maintenance/repairs, etc.). We are both "overworked", LOL- but we both think it's worth every minute of it.

[Amy in NH]

making money - DH
paying bills - ME
budgeting- ME
mortgage/loans- ME
home repair/maintenance - SHARE, although he does the big complicated things, I do help quite a bit
banking/investments- ME
taxes- ME
car care- DH
health insurance - ME
scheduling (making/keeping track of)- ME
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above- ME
teaching/school work or homework- ME
discipline (planning and implementing)- SHARE, I plan, he helps implement
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
kids mornings- ME
kids bedtimes- SHARE
transportation for kids- SHARE
grocery shopping- ME
laundry- ME
eating at home - SHARE
eating away (pack lunch when we're all out)- ME
eating away (he packs his own lunch for work)- DH
dishes- DH
vacuuming- ME
clean bathrooms- ME
mop floors- SHARE
lawn care/snow cleanup- DH
garden or bed maintenance- SHARE

[Shannon831]

making money- DH
paying bills- Me
budgeting- Me
mortgage/loans- Me
home repair/maintenance- DH
banking/investments- Me
taxes- Me
car care- DH
health insurance- Me
scheduling (making/keeping track of)- Both, with an emphasis on me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above- Me
teaching/school work or homework- Me
discipline (planning and implementing)- Both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")- Both, with an emphasis on DH
kids mornings- Me
kids bedtimes- 3/4 me, 1/4 dh
transportation for kids- Me
grocery shopping- Me
laundry- Me
eating at home- Me
eating away (pack lunch, etc)- Me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)- Me
lawn care/snow cleanup- Dh
garden or bed maintenance- DH

[Ananda]

**Childless 22 year olds thought it might be interesting

making money--dh
paying bills--me
budgeting--We're supposed to budget:confused:
mortgage/loans--we live in an apartment, I pay rent
home repair/maintenance--typically me
banking/investments--dh checks balance daily, I physically go to the bank and handle investments
taxes--both, taxes are fun
car care--me or my father
health insurance--dh's work
scheduling (making/keeping track of)--both
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above--me except to scary landlord
teaching/school work or homework--I am a university student, both when we have dc
discipline (planning and implementing)--me after dc
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")--N/A
transportation--me, husband won't drive (phobia)
grocery shopping--small trips me, large trips both
laundry--me
eating at home--both (we love to cook)
eating away (pack lunch, etc)--both
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)--mostly me

[Fourmother]

My dh is Director of Homeland Security, Environmental Health and Safety, Pest and Vector Control, Site and Auto Maintenance, and Waste Management. He is also our official Fearless Spiritual Leader.

I am Director of Health and Nutrition, Finance and Accounting, Procurement, and Public Relations. I am also Secretary of Education.

We share a joint appointment to Janitorial, Laundry and Landscape Services.

[Amy loves Bud]

making money - Him
paying bills - Him
budgeting - we don't
mortgage/loans - we don't
home repair/maintenance - both, depends on the item
banking/investments - Him
taxes - Him
car care - we each take care of our own car
health insurance - Me
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - Me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - ?
teaching/school work or homework - Me
discipline (planning and implementing) - Both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - Both
kids mornings - me
kids bedtimes - we alternate
transportation for kids - both
grocery shopping - me
laundry - me
eating at home - me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - me
lawn care/snow cleanup - him
garden or bed maintenance - me

Now I'm very interested to see what others do! Good thread!

[WTMindy]

making money-both, but dh makes more
paying billsused to be me, now dh
budgetingdh
mortgage/loansdh
home repair/maintenancedh
banking/investmentsdh
taxesdh
car caredh
health insurance dh
scheduling (making/keeping track of)me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the aboveboth
teaching/school work or homeworkboth, but mostly me
discipline (planning and implementing)both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")both
kids morningsme during the week, both on weekends
kids bedtimesdh
transportation for kidsboth, usually me
grocery shoppingboth
laundryme
eating at homeboth, usually me
eating away (pack lunch, etc)both
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)both, but mostly me
lawn care/snow cleanupboth, but mostly dh
garden or bed maintenanceboth

[Michelle T]

making money - DH, except he's not making any right now
paying bills - me
budgeting - me, in as much as it gets done
mortgage/loans - DH, he is a loan consultant
home repair/maintenance - I generally schedule this sort of thing
banking/investments - DH
taxes - we pay to have this done, DH mainly deals with it
car care - mainly DH
health insurance - I deal with this, DH's work pays for it
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - mainly me
teaching/school work or homework - me
discipline (planning and implementing) - mainly me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") doesn't apply here, we are different religions
kids mornings - me
kids bedtimes - both
transportation for kids - me
grocery shopping - me
laundry - me
eating at home - me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) me
lawn care/snow cleanup -me
garden or bed maintenance - me

Michelle T

[Citrusheights5]

making money dh
paying billsboth
budgetingboth
mortgage/loansboth
home repair/maintenanceme
banking/investmentsme
taxesme
car careme
health insurancedh
scheduling (making/keeping track of)dh
phone calls or correspondence re: all the abovedh i hate phone calls
teaching/school work or homeworkme
discipline (planning and implementing)me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")n/a
kids morningsdh
kids bedtimesme
transportation for kidsdh
grocery shoppingboth
laundrydh all the way
eating at homeme
eating away (pack lunch, etc)both
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)me
lawn care/snow cleanupdh
garden or bed maintenancefamily

Never really think about this. DH is home on disabillity so he does a lot...

Lee

[Linda in NM]

Uh oh.

making money--share
paying bills ME
budgeting ME
mortgage/loans ME
home repair/maintenance start by sharing, but son & I wind up doing most of the work...
banking/investments ME
taxes ME
car care share
health insurance DH
scheduling (making/keeping track of) ME
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above ME
teaching/school work or homework ME
discipline (planning and implementing) share
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") share
kids mornings ME
kids bedtimes ME
transportation for kids ME (unless I'm deathly ill)
grocery shopping ME
laundry share
eating at home ME
eating away (pack lunch, etc) ME
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) ME
lawn care/snow cleanup DH
garden or bed maintenance share

Looks like he gets off too easy!

[Susan in TX]

making money-DH
paying bills-me
budgeting-me
mortgage/loans- N/A
home repair/maintenance-DH
banking/investments-me
taxes-me
car care-DH
health insurance-me
scheduling (making/keeping track of)-me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above-both
teaching/school work or homework-me
discipline (planning and implementing)-both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")-both
kids mornings-me
kids bedtimes-me
transportation for kids-me, dh takes oldest daughter to/from college for breaks and some weekends
grocery shopping-me
laundry-me
eating at home-me
eating away (pack lunch, etc)- N/A
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)-me
lawn care/snow cleanup-DH
garden or bed maintenance-DH

I have to say that I'm very happy with our division of labor. I am very glad that I don't have to go out and make money! I really think I have the easier job.

Susan in TX

[mcconnellboys]

making money - spouse
paying bills - spouse
budgeting - share
mortgage/loans - spouse (goes with bills; we don't have a mortgage)
home repair/maintenance - share
banking/investments - spouse
taxes - spouse (used to be me)
car care - spouse, mostly, but me sometimes
health insurance -spouse
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - me
teaching/school work or homework - me
discipline (planning and implementing) - me unless there's such a problem that I call him in
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - me (including for spouse)
kids mornings - me mostly, but dh gets up older ds, who wouldn't get up for me
kids bedtimes - me, mostly
transportation for kids - me almost exclusively
grocery shopping -me except for things spouse wants for himself on occasion
laundry - me
eating at home - me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - me, mostly
lawn care/snow cleanup - spouse
garden or bed maintenance - me


Regena

[amyable]

making money -dh
paying bills -dh
budgeting - both
mortgage/loans - we don't have any anymore:hurray:
home repair/maintenance -dh
banking/investments -dh
taxes -dh (lol, Im beginning to think I don't do anything around here...)
car care -dh
health insurance -dh (through his job)
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - me, mostly
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - phone is dh whenever possible, correspondence mine
teaching/school work or homework - me
discipline (planning and implementing) -mostly me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - mostly me
kids mornings - both
kids bedtimes - both
transportation for kids -me
grocery shopping -usually dh
laundry - me
eating at home - mostly me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) -dh does his own
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - mostly me
lawn care/snow cleanup - mostly dh although I love to mow
garden or bed maintenance - we kill plants equally here :lol:

[Rebecca in GA]

making money - DH
paying bills - Me
budgeting - Me
mortgage/loans - DH
home repair/maintenance - Both
banking/investments - Both
taxes - DH
car care - DH
health insurance - DH
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - Me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - Both
teaching/school work or homework - Both
discipline (planning and implementing) - Both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - Both
kids mornings - Me
kids bedtimes - Both
transportation for kids - Me
grocery shopping - Me
laundry - Me
eating at home - Me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - Me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) Both
lawn care/snow cleanup - DH
garden or bed maintenance - Both

[brehon]

making money
both of us
paying bills
me
budgeting
both of us
mortgage/loans
me
home repair/maintenance
both of us, but, truthfully, dh ends up doing more
banking/investments
me
taxes
me, generally
car care
dh
health insurance
me -- the family is under my health insurance through work
scheduling (making/keeping track of)
me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above
usually me. my dh once actually said (to an especially troublesome
subcontractor), "Don't make me put my wife on the phone." [sigh]
teaching/school work or homework
both of us
discipline (planning and implementing)
we've thought out our discipline strategy together. the implementor is
whoever is dealing with the issue.
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
both
kids mornings
days when I'm on duty -- both of us; days when I'm off duty -- me
kids bedtimes
both of us
transportation for kids
again, whoever is available when the need arises
grocery shopping
dh
laundry
both of us
eating at home
both of us...or do you mean who cooks? that would be dh. I do all
the baking.
eating away (pack lunch, etc)
me, but it's for me when I'm on duty (eating out every third day is
way too expensive!!)
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)
whoever is free when the chore or cleaning needs to be completed
lawn care/snow cleanup
dh
garden or bed maintenance
fruit & veg garden -- both of us; flower beds -- me


Hmmm...seems like I'm the Minister of Finances and Health. dh is the Minister of Grease. We share all other portfolios and there is no Prime Minister. Or rather, we share that job. Works well for us.

[PiCO]

making money ME
paying bills ME
budgeting WHAT'S THAT?
mortgage/loans ME
home repair/maintenance HIRED HELP
banking/investments ME
taxes ACCOUNTANT
car care MECHANIC
health insurance ME
scheduling (making/keeping track of) ME
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above ME
teaching/school work or homework ME
discipline (planning and implementing) ME
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") ME
kids mornings KIDS
kids bedtimes ME
transportation for kids ME
grocery shopping ME
laundry KIDS
eating at home ME
eating away (pack lunch, etc) ME
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) ME
lawn care/snow cleanup LANDSCAPERS
garden or bed maintenance KIDS

I'm a widow, so I just hire out whatever I don't want to do.

[kdeno]

(you, spouse, or share)

making money husband
paying bills Husband
budgeting both
mortgage/loans husband
home repair/maintenance husband
banking/investments husband
taxes husband
car care repairs~husband I am trying to keep it tidy and vacuumed
health insurance husband
scheduling (making/keeping track of) me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above phone calls me
teaching/school work or homework me
discipline (planning and implementing) both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") both
kids mornings me
kids bedtimes shared
transportation for kids not applicable
grocery shopping shared
laundry me
eating at home me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) me
lawn care/snow cleanup hubby
garden or bed maintenance neither ;-)

[EKS]

paying bills--ME
budgeting--ME
mortgage/loans--ME
home repair/maintenance--BOTH
banking/investments--ME
taxes--ME
car care--DH
health insurance--ME
scheduling (making/keeping track of)--ME
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above--ME
teaching/school work or homework--ME
discipline (planning and implementing)--BOTH
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")--ME
kids mornings--BOETH
kids bedtimes--BOTH
transportation for kids--BOTH
grocery shopping--ME
laundry--DH
eating at home--BOTH (mostly ME)
eating away (pack lunch, etc)--ME
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)--BOTH
lawn care/snow cleanup--DH
garden or bed maintenance--DH

[Laurel T.]

making money(I just this month joined in this endeavor)
paying bills--me
budgeting--me
mortgage/loans--me
home repair/maintenance--we don't do much here
banking/investments--me
taxes--me
car care--share
scheduling (making/keeping track of)--me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above--me
teaching/school work or homework--me (but dh is starting to help)
discipline (planning and implementing)--shared
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")--shared
kids mornings--me
kids bedtimes--shared
grocery shopping--me
laundry--shared
eating at home--shared
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)--mostly me

DH really does a lot to help out around the house, but please keep him away from the laundry.

Laurel T.

[Trivium Academy]

DH
making money
taxes - b/c I don't make any Lol.
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above (for the church, DH)
scheduling (making/keeping track of) DH, his own
laundry- DH, his own

ME
paying bills
budgeting
mortgage/loans
home repair/maintenance (mostly ME)
banking/investments
car care
health insurance
scheduling (making/keeping track of), ME for the family
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above (for the family- ME)
teaching/school work or homework
discipline (planning and implementing)
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
kids mornings
kids bedtimes
transportation for kids
grocery shopping
laundry - the kids and I
eating at home
eating away (pack lunch, etc)
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)
lawn care/snow cleanup
garden or bed maintenance

Yep, sigh.

[Dawn E]

making money-dh
paying bills-me
budgeting-what?
mortgage/loans-share
home repair/maintenance-dh
banking/investments-share
taxes-dh
car care-share, but mostly dh
health insurance-share
scheduling (making/keeping track of)
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above-share
teaching/school work or homework-me
discipline (planning and implementing)-share
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")-share
kids mornings-dh
kids bedtimes-share, but mostly me
transportation for kids-me
grocery shopping-me, though he runs errands to pick up things I miss
laundry-me
eating at home-me
eating away (pack lunch, etc)-share
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)-share
lawn care/snow cleanup-pay neighbor's son
garden or bed maintenance-n/a

[gardenschooler]

making money - DH
paying bills - both
budgeting - both
mortgage/loans - both
home repair/maintenance - both
banking/investments - both
taxes -both
car care - DH
health insurance -Me
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - Me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - Me
teaching/school work or homework - Me
discipline (planning and implementing) - Me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - Me
kids mornings - Me
kids bedtimes - Me
transportation for kids - DH
grocery shopping - both
laundry -Me
eating at home -both, mostly me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - Me
lawn care/snow cleanup - Me
garden or bed maintenance - Me


Looks a little lopsided! But I never do 'errands'. I don't even really know what 'errands' are. Dh will happily do anything of that sort. And he's a great cook!

[Mamagistra]

budgeting-what?

:willy_nilly:

:lol:

[Perry]

making money --DH
paying bills --me
budgeting --me
mortgage/loans --me
home repair/maintenance --mostly DH
banking/investments --me
taxes --DH
car care --DH
health insurance --me
scheduling (making/keeping track of) --me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above --me
teaching/school work or homework --me
discipline (planning and implementing) --mostly me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") --neither
kids mornings --me
kids bedtimes --me
transportation for kids --me
grocery shopping --me
laundry --both
eating at home --me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) --me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) --both
lawn care/snow cleanup --both
garden or bed maintenance --both

[linders]

This list got me thinking. It looks heavy on the "me" category, but part of the reason is a difference in philosophies. My DH makes enough that he would be quite happy to hire out lots of these tasks (e.g., get a housekeeper, yard person, etc.) In fact, that's what he did before we were married. When we got married, I said it was ridiculous for 2 adults who worked reasonable hours not to do these things themselves. As a consequence, I took on most, with DH rather reluctantly pitching in sometimes. When I became a SAHM, I ended up with all of it. I recently did some consulting work specifically with the idea of paying for a housekeeper for the year...and I can't make myself get one! Someone knock me up the side of the head, please....

Linders

making money - mostly DH
paying bills - me
budgeting - me
mortgage/loans - me
home repair/maintenance - both
banking/investments - me
taxes - me
car care - both
health insurance - me
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - me
teaching/school work or homework - me
discipline (planning and implementing) - mostly me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - me
kids mornings - me
kids bedtimes - me
transportation for kids - me
grocery shopping - me
laundry - me
eating at home - me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - NA
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - me
lawn care/snow cleanup - lawn-DH, snow-me
garden or bed maintenance - me
planning holidays - me
planning family events/vacations - me

[orangeblossom]

making money - dh
paying bills - dh (I used to do it but needed a break)
budgeting - both together
mortgage/loans - dh as part of bill paying
home repair/maintenance - mostly dh but I help
banking/investments - dh
taxes - dh
car care - both...I look after my car and he looks after his, although he takes the cars in to the shop when needed
health insurance - dh, but I make the appts and take the kids
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - me
teaching/school work or homework - me mostly, dh does science and latin with the kids
discipline (planning and implementing) - we do this together
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - both
kids mornings - me
kids bedtimes - dh mon to fri, me on the weekends
transportation for kids - mostly me, sometimes dh
grocery shopping - both
laundry - me
eating at home - me during the week, dh on the weekends
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - me and the kids, dh washes the floors
lawn care/snow cleanup - dh
garden or bed maintenance - dh

I'm very happy with our routine and so is dh (except the floors but he does it anyways).

[Rebel]

making money - mainly dh, but I make a little
paying bills - me
budgeting - both
mortgage/loans - dh
home repair/maintenance - dh
banking/investments - dh
taxes - me
car care - both
health insurance - me
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - me
teaching/school work or homework - mostly me
discipline (planning and implementing) - both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - both
kids mornings - neither
kids bedtimes - neither
transportation for kids - me
grocery shopping - both
laundry - me
eating at home - both
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - me and ds
lawn care/snow cleanup - me
garden or bed maintenance - me

[5wolfcubs]

My answers are in bold...


making money DH
paying bills DH
budgeting DH, well if we had one...
mortgage/loans DH
home repair/maintenance Me, hiring someone
banking/investments DH
taxes DH
car care Me, taking cars to shop
health insurance Me
scheduling (making/keeping track of) Me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above Me
teaching/school work or homework Me
discipline (planning and implementing) Me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") Me
kids mornings Me
kids bedtimes Me
transportation for kids Me
grocery shopping Me
laundry THE KIDS!
eating at home Me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) Me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) Me
lawn care/snow cleanup All of us
garden or bed maintenance Me


It would be interesting to see how the husbands would fill out the same chart...

[Kay in Cal]

ME (or mostly) in Red
DH (or mostly) in Blue
both (or neither) in green

making money -- ME
paying bills -- DH
budgeting -- both
mortgage/loans -- both
home repair/maintenance -- call a pro
banking/investments -- none
taxes -- both
car care -- ME (just scheduling appt.s and driving through the wash)
health insurance -- ME
scheduling (making/keeping track of) -- both
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above -- ME
teaching/school work or homework -- DH teaches/ I plan (and teach all Wednesday and as I have free time)
discipline (planning and implementing) -- both
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") -- ME
kids mornings -- ME
kids bedtimes -- alternate nights (DH if I am working)
transportation for kids -- DH
grocery shopping -- DH (I like to go if I have time, but he's in charge)
laundry -- both (DH more often)
eating at home -- both (DH more often)
eating away (pack lunch, etc) -- DH
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) -- both & cleaning lady
lawn care/snow cleanup -- neither (townhouse)
garden or bed maintenance -- neither (townhouse)

[Amy in TX]

making money
dh

paying bills
dh

budgeting
both

mortgage/loans
both

home repair/maintenance
dh

banking/investments
dh with input from me

taxes
dh

car care
dh

health insurance
dh with input from me

scheduling (making/keeping track of)
me

phone calls or correspondence re: all the above
both

teaching/school work or homework
me with input from dh

discipline (planning and implementing)
both

spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
both

kids mornings
both

kids bedtimes
both

transportation for kids
both

grocery shopping
me

laundry
me

eating at home
me

eating away (pack lunch, etc)
me

daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)
me

lawn care/snow cleanup
both

garden or bed maintenance
both

[JFS in IL]

hubby does (most of):

making money
home repair/maintenance
banking/investments
taxes
lawn care/snow cleanup

the rest is mine. He takes the train and is gone 7am - 6:30pm.
I am home with only ONE kid in homeschool at the present. I have more time!

[KidsHappen]

making money
paying bills
budgeting
mortgage/loans
home repair/maintenance
banking/investments
taxes
car care
health insurance
scheduling (making/keeping track of)
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above
teaching/school work or homework
discipline (planning and implementing)
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
kids mornings
kids bedtimes
transportation for kids
grocery shopping
laundry
eating at home
eating away (pack lunch, etc)
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)
lawn care/snow cleanup
garden or bed maintenance

[KidsHappen]

making money - DH
paying bills - Share
budgeting - Share
mortgage/loans - Share
home repair/maintenance - DH
banking/investments - Share
taxes - Share
car care - DH
health insurance - Share
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - Me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - Dh makes phone calls I do emailing and letters
teaching/school work or homework - Me
discipline (planning and implementing) - Almost always me
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - Me
kids mornings - Me
kids bedtimes - Me
transportation for kids - Share
grocery shopping - Share
laundry - Me
eating at home - Dh cooks, I eat :)
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - We don't do this
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - mostly me
lawn care/snow cleanup - Dh
garden or bed maintenance Dh


Additional housecleaning mostly me

I answered before reading other response so I will be interested to see others answers.

[HSMom2One]

making money - share (although dh works full-time and I work part-time)
paying bills - me
budgeting - me
mortgage/loans - share
home repair/maintenance - dh
banking/investments - share
taxes - me
car care - share
health insurance - me
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - me
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - me
teaching/school work or homework - me
discipline (planning and implementing) - share
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - me
kids mornings - me
kids bedtimes - share
transportation for kids - share
grocery shopping - share
laundry - me
eating at home - me
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - me
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - me
lawn care/snow cleanup - dh
garden or bed maintenance - we need help with this one!

[StacyWithFourRugrats]

making money - DH
paying bills - ME
budgeting - ME
mortgage/loans - ME (except where he needed to sign)
home repair/maintenance - BOTH
banking/investments - ME
taxes - ME
car care - DH MOSTLY
health insurance - ME
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - ME
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - ME (unless required by him)
teaching/school work or homework - ME
discipline (planning and implementing) - BOTH
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - BOTH
kids mornings - BOTH (if he is working from home or it is a weekend, it is him...otherwise, me)
kids bedtimes - BOTH but more often it is DH
transportation for kids - ME
grocery shopping - ME definately!
laundry - BOTH
eating at home - ME with the occasional DH (I like cooking)
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - ME tho DH will help if it is a family thing
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - BOTH (bathrooms are DH's responsibility)
lawn care/snow cleanup - DH with the occasional ME mowing the lawn
garden or bed maintenance - BOTH

[Wendy In KS]

making money - DH
paying bills - ME
budgeting - ME
mortgage/loans - ME
home repair/maintenance - BOTH
banking/investments - ME
taxes - ME
car care - DH
health insurance - ME
scheduling (making/keeping track of) - ME
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above - ME
teaching/school work or homework - ME
discipline (planning and implementing) - BOTH
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head") - BOTH
kids mornings - ME
kids bedtimes - BOTH but more often it is DH
transportation for kids - ME
grocery shopping - ME
laundry - ME
eating at home - BOTH, but mainly me due to time during the week
eating away (pack lunch, etc) - ME
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!) - ME except for the kitchen after dinner sometimes or if we're getting ready for company
lawn care/snow cleanup - DH
garden or bed maintenance - n/a

[Night Elf]

Me:
paying bills
scheduling - only of piano and swim lessons, dr. appointments and outside activities
grocery shopping

DH:
making money
budgeting
banking/investments
taxes
car care (takes them to mechanic)
health insurance (his job provides)

Share:
mortgage/loans (as in when to get one)
home repair/maintenance (do ourselves and hire others, depending)
phone calls or correspondence re: all the above
transportation for kids
laundry
eating at home
eating away (pack lunch, etc)
daily chores/cleaning (really need sub-categories!)
lawn care

No one because we don't have that in our family:
teaching/school work or homework (should mention we're unschoolers without formal learning requirements)
discipline (planning and implementing)
spiritual guidance (who actually carries it out, not just the "head")
kids mornings
kids bedtimes
garden or bed maintenance