what happens when they go into PS

[mlgbug]

So, your 5 year old is reading....they enter K, but are way beyond the K student....

what happens next?

[EKS]

"They all even out by third grade."

This is why we homeschool.

[WendyK]

Nothing special happens. Unless you consider parent and child frustration special.

[SheWillFly]

You tell the teacher. The teacher already suspected. You keep encouraging your child to just follow the directions and by first grade they are finally split into skill based reading groups but your child is still ahead and they don't know what to do with your child. :glare: So, you continue to work on reading and engaging their brain at the level they are when they are home with you and you both make the best of the situation.

[zaichiki]

In school? They don't learn anything new that year... or the next... or possibly the next. Soon, they learn that nothing is challenging. If they are ever in a situation where they *do* need to buckle down to learn something at their challenge level, they don't know how to do that. They usually refuse to even try anything challenging. Some have behavior problems. Drop outs, drugs...

I know a few families who have pulled their kids to homeschool before it gets too far.

Cheers!

[lionfamily1999]

Sometimes your child becomes a problem child and if you dare point out they're bored, and maybe if they could try to engage your child with more interesting classes or just give them harder work then dc would behave, they read you the riot act for having put them in that position. Oh and you get lessons on how they cannot cater to one child and advanced kids do not qualify for special ed.:glare:

[mlgbug]

wow. so i have many things to tell the family on WHY DD should remained homeschholed. they all think when she hits K they will psuh her into a second grade class to work on reading ect. i tried to say no

[WendyK]

No school is mostly a one size fits all. Grade skips aren't unheard of, but they aren't easy to get and they really don't make things better.

[rowan25]

30 years ago, I was stuck in a corner with an advanced phonics workbook because of just that reason.

Today, I keep my daughter home because I don't want her spending her time learning how to stand in line and raise her hand. Not to mention her colors, shapes, numbers, etc.

[zaichiki]

they all think when she hits K they will psuh her into a second grade class to work on reading ect. i tried to say no

Subject acceleration (going into a higher grade class just for reading, for example) is not unheard of either... but it IS hard to come by. And... it's not always the best solution anyway. (Sometimes it's not a "reading" class, but an "English" or "Language Arts" class which includes writing. Often a child who can read grade levels ahead of age cannot necessarily write a three paragraph essay like the kids in that grade may be learning that year.)

In my experience, public schools and pricey non-religious private schools are very stingy with grade and subject acceleration. (Several have told me "no" in no uncertain terms.) We have had an easy road to hoe getting a grade acceleration out of our local, small (and I think that's key), religious school.

Yay homeschooling!

[Jen3boys]

I think it really depends on the school and the teacher. When my dc were in ps, they had mixed grade classes, and the kids moved to different teachers for reading and math. (Even in k). So when my dc were in K, they were in math w/some 1st graders.

[servin]

The district home school coordinator said if I was going to put my child in school stop teaching him anything and let him just play until he enrolls. Otherwise he would just be frustrated with school.

We visited the school during registration time. The Principal said if my child was that far ahead in math and reading then he would just have to wait until the other kids caught up. Around 3rd grade. :001_huh: They didn't have the time to work with such differences and he still had to complete each and everything the teacher gave the students to do. And if he was really fast with it then he would have to do whatever busy work she gave him to keep him quiet during class time. I said so then he would do the kindergarten grade work and EXTRA work?

When he said yes, we left and have homeschooled ever since.

[Nan in Mass]

We sent our youngest to kindergarten already able to read. There were two other children in his class who could also read. The assistant (despite being a very ordinary person and telling me she found it scary how well my child drew and read) did a nice job of working on reading with those three while the rest of the class worked on letters. My son learned lots of other things in kindergarten, including standing in line, taking his turn, being friendly, and generally getting along with others. Those are why we sent him. We have a relaxed, non-academic kindergarten, so learning to read generally happens in first grade. First grade is when much more seat-work begins and the classroom is much more school-y. I had serious doubts about sending my son to wait out first grade. I think if I had, they would have taught him where he was, because first and second grade have such a spread of abilities that there were extra assistants to help those ahead and behind, but I still thought it would be better for him to stay home. Look at how many assistants are in the classroom. We had one teacher and two assistants for twenty children. If the ratio is less, I would seriously wonder about sending my children.
-Nan

[Mrs.MacGyver]

The district home school coordinator said if I was going to put my child in school stop teaching him anything and let him just play until he enrolls. Otherwise he would just be frustrated with school.

We visited the school during registration time. The Principal said if my child was that far ahead in math and reading then he would just have to wait until the other kids caught up. Around 3rd grade. :001_huh: They didn't have the time to work with such differences and he still had to complete each and everything the teacher gave the students to do. And if he was really fast with it then he would have to do whatever busy work she gave him to keep him quiet during class time. I said so then he would do the kindergarten grade work and EXTRA work?

When he said yes, we left and have homeschooled ever since.

EXACTLY what we were told with DD. But she desperately wanted to "go to school," and we gave in. We took her out 2 months later. The "new" wore off...she came home crying everyday that she didn't want to go to "baby school" any more. She said that she wanted to go to school to learn something and that all they did was put her off in a corner to read "baby" books... (and we had taken her in when she was 4 to be tested hoping to put her directly into 1st grade because we were worried that this would happen, and we knew that she was socially and emotionally above even most 1st graders----after sitting patiently through 3 hours of testing, they told us that even though she tests high enough to move up, they just don't do that:confused:) It was very frustrating. Nevertheless...here we are - homeschooling.

[Donna]

you don't put that child in school for K. You keep him home and homeschool him. When he turns 13yo, he decides he wants to go to high school for sports reasons so you start him in 8th grade. The public school tests him...in class while class is going on then tries to tell you he qualifies for Gifted Algebra (no, duh, he had done Alg 1, Geometry, and was over half-way through Alg 2 at home last year) but does not qualify for Gifted Language Arts even though for 3 years before that he qualified for CTY based on language arts skills.

So, you try reasoning with the principal who brushes you off as a pushy mom. Then contact the superintendent who agrees that one test alone, especially given the circumstances, shouldn't determine his placement so has them give him another test. Child takes said test and lo and behold is as gifted as you said he was (scored way higher on their test than needed to qualify for gifted program).

You are partially happy that child is in highest available classes but know he is going to learn nothing new until you can get him into AP classes the following year and then still maybe not. So, you decide to afterschool said child while he is attending school and remain determined to attempt to talk your other two children into homeschooling until college. :001_smile:

[jonnia]

My youngest son, who is now 7, managed 2 months of ps kindergarten. He was reading already, yet was expected to sit still and be quiet while everyone else learned their letters and colors, etc. There were 2 assistant teachers in the class, but no willingness on the part of the administration to make accommodations for the children who were a little ahead. Some of these kids can manage to stay out of trouble, but my little fireball was not that concerned about whether he had a red light or green light for behavior at the end of the day. He and a couple of like minded little boys managed to entertain themselves. My son was one of the "bad boys" within the first 4 weeks! My husband and I could see exactly where this was heading! When I picked up his things from the classroom and let his teacher know that we'd decided to homeschool, she was clearly relieved!! She actually said, "Well, he already knows everything that we'll be covering this year anyway."

When people ask why we homeschool, I tell them that we're doing the local ps teachers a favor. :D

[WendyK]

The district home school coordinator said if I was going to put my child in school stop teaching him anything and let him just play until he enrolls. Otherwise he would just be frustrated with school.

We visited the school during registration time. The Principal said if my child was that far ahead in math and reading then he would just have to wait until the other kids caught up. Around 3rd grade. :001_huh: They didn't have the time to work with such differences and he still had to complete each and everything the teacher gave the students to do. And if he was really fast with it then he would have to do whatever busy work she gave him to keep him quiet during class time. I said so then he would do the kindergarten grade work and EXTRA work?

When he said yes, we left and have homeschooled ever since.

So in other words, learning isn't really the most important goal of schools. :glare:

[nova147]

This:

"They all even out by third grade."


This:

No school is mostly a one size fits all. Grade skips aren't unheard of, but they aren't easy to get and they really don't make things better.

And, oh yeah, this:



When people ask why we homeschool, I tell them that we're doing the local ps teachers a favor. :D


I wanted to send Jack to k'er this fall (he turns 5 after the "soft" cutoff date). But the ps superintendent has decided that early kindergarten entrance is NEVER appropriate. And while I didn't hear the "they all even out by 3rd grade" at the public school, I did at the private one. I figure we are doing the teachers a favor by keeping him home. And the other kids in the class. But, most importantly, we're doing Jack a favor. If he "evens out" by 3rd grade, maybe I'll send him. Anybody want to place a bet? :D

[psychgal]

And this:
"We don't teach children. We teach curricula."

[BeckyR]

We sent our DS5 to a private school this year for precisely this reason. I didn't have to say anything at all. The 2nd week of school the teacher casually told me, "He's reading way above grade level so we moved him up to 1st grade reading." The whole school does each subject at the same time and it is common here to move kids up or down according to their subject level. Why does PS have to make this so hard?

[zaichiki]

So in other words, learning isn't really the most important goal of schools. :glare:

I think schools' most important goal is the status quo: keeping everything going as it "should." Any deviation from that needs intervention -- to enable that person to "stay in the box." Thus, kids who need additional support and help in order to "keep up" will get it, because the goal is that they end up back in step with the others. Kids who are ahead are already out of step. There is no motivation to encourage them to be further out of step, so... what motivation do they have to educate them?

If your goal for your child is somewhere in that school's "box," even for just that year, then things will probably go well (at least for that year). If your (or your child's) goal lays elsewhere, well...

[Laura in CA]

My son was one of two kids in his K class who already read fluently; they got extra books & library time. He was skipped up to 1st grade as soon as there was an opening (Thanksgiving) and his 1st-grade teacher seemed annoyed by his work. For example, on a math page they were supposed to write different ways to make numbers (e.g., 8=6+2, 5+3, etc.), and he wrote 8=20÷2.5. She didn't mark it wrong, but she wasn't pleased. That was in March. By April I was researching homeschooling, and we've never looked back. Now at 12 he's doing precalculus and loving life ;-)

Oh, when they agreed to the grade skip, the principal, psychologist, etc. told us that they do grade-skips only when the child is working at least 3 or 4 grades ahead, so this wouldn't really solve the problem. Hey, they were right!

~Laura

[zaichiki]

he wrote 8=20÷2.5. She didn't mark it wrong, but she wasn't pleased.

Doesn't that just beat all?!?! I wonder if, perhaps, she didn't understand the answer. (After reading Liping Ma's book, I finally realize that this is a distinct possibility! And isn't that SAD?!)

Ah well... he was obviously thinking outside of her box. Maybe THAT is what made her uncomfortable?

It makes *me* uncomfortable that elementary school teachers can be uncomfortable when kids are capable of *more* than they expect. It also makes me uncomfortable that an elementary school teacher might not understand that 20/2.5=8. Sigh.

[nova147]

Oh, when they agreed to the grade skip, the principal, psychologist, etc. told us that they do grade-skips only when the child is working at least 3 or 4 grades ahead, so this wouldn't really solve the problem. Hey, they were right!




I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Our society really has decided to leave gifted kids behind.

[LittleIzumi]

When I went into K, my parents say I just tried to teach the other kids :lol: (I was reading at 3). Once there was a G&T program, I was in it, and there was talk of grade skipping but they discouraged it. So guess what--my parents pulled me out to homeschool me, lol. My brothers and I all went through the PS-some-years, HS-some-years experience. When my brothers wanted to go to school for the social factor like a PP said, my parents let them, and they usually asked to homeschool the next year. My parents used Calvert one year and their test had me skip a grade, and then when I went back to HS for two years (in a "nicer" school--still not very challenging) that school accepted the grade shift. I wonder why they don't accept the starting grade change the same way? Or maybe we just got lucky with our school not putting me back down at my age grade.

[Laura in CA]

Doesn't that just beat all?!?! I wonder if, perhaps, she didn't understand the answer. (After reading Liping Ma's book, I finally realize that this is a distinct possibility! And isn't that SAD?!)

Exactly -- that occurred to me only much later, that she was very likely fuzzy on decimals herself. I'll have to check out the book you mentioned -- sounds intriguing!

Ah well... he was obviously thinking outside of her box. Maybe THAT is what made her uncomfortable?

Yes, that, and probably being unsure about decimals herself; and thinking he was showing off, perhaps, since 1st-graders aren't supposed to know about division, much less decimals; perhaps she thought I was a pushy parent (in fact I never taught him about division or decimals; he just absorbed math like a sponge); her own sons were slightly older, so perhaps it was jealousy . . . who knows?

It makes *me* uncomfortable that elementary school teachers can be uncomfortable when kids are capable of *more* than they expect. It also makes me uncomfortable that an elementary school teacher might not understand that 20/2.5=8. Sigh.

*Sigh* is right . . . well, it led *us* to homeschooling and a much saner family life.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Our society really has decided to leave gifted kids behind.

Yes. I do worry about all the gifted kids learning to hate school, and how we're failing these kids . . .

[Melinda]

Well, here is what happened to me.

I was one of these gifted kids. I grew up in Anchorage, Alaska. Gifted education used to be considered special ed. I even had an IEP.

Even with the IEP, I would have been better off being taught at home. My K teacher was wonderful and seriously advocated for me. I can remember being in first grade though, and being given all of my work for the week on Monday morning (I was in a program that focused on personal accountability at this point, so everybody did their work at their own pace throughout the week). Anyhow, I would have my work done by Monday at lunch or maybe Monday afternoon, and then I would spend the week (alone) in the school library or reading to myself in the classroom.

I did really well socially through the third grade, when the gifted immersion stopped for me. From fourth grade on, I was in a 1-2 day/week pull-out program. It was an amazing program and I was happy when I was there, but it caused a lot of issues for me. It didn't take long for the other kids in my class to figure out I was different and getting special treatment because of it. There was a boy in my class that was also sent, so at least I wasn't completely alone. But the other kids in class became resentful and ostracized us. The teachers became resentful at our missing class time (maybe having to teach the same thing twice?) and would often refuse to do things like teach us the math lesson we missed while we were gone.

When I finished 8th grade, I completely stopped with the gifted (gifted/enriched/honors) classes because a lot of the time at that point, the classes are not made up of more challenging work, it is just *more* work. I did enroll in a half-day paideia program, which was wonderful.

So, I did not become a behavior problem because of being in school, but I *did* lose interest in school pretty early because of the way my education was approached. I do not want my children to lose their love of learning like I did or to be made fun of because they are smart or to feel like they have to act like they don't know the answer because they want to fit in. I want more for my kids than what I had and at this point, the way to get that (for us) is homeschooling them.

I hope you are able to make the decision that is right for your family. Good luck! :)

[Pamela H in Texas]

Since I didn't get any attention and accommodation for being smart, I came up with a bunch of other ways to get attention. In first grade, I couldn't spell my last name. My dad put an end to that (making me write it for hours for a couple days). In 2nd grade, I just "could not" get fractions. Really, you'd think they would have caught on that I was making this up. In 3rd grade, I couldn't hear then couldn't see. My mom ran me to appointments finding out I was just fine. But in school, I had a classmate sit with me to "translate," the teacher stood closer and checked on me. And the list just goes on.

I was SO happy when put in an alternative setting for 7th and 8th grades. We did school 3 hours per day. In 16.5 months (minus summer), I did all of the 7th-10th grade materials (though only through Algebra). Finally, freedom to SOAR. I was so appreciative of the facilitator for letting me.

But that was short lived. In 10th grade, a girl left to go back to homeschooling (she was a gymnast). That was my first thought of "I think I'll homeschool my children."

[WendyK]

My son was one of two kids in his K class who already read fluently; they got extra books & library time. He was skipped up to 1st grade as soon as there was an opening (Thanksgiving) and his 1st-grade teacher seemed annoyed by his work. For example, on a math page they were supposed to write different ways to make numbers (e.g., 8=6+2, 5+3, etc.), and he wrote 8=20÷2.5. She didn't mark it wrong, but she wasn't pleased. That was in March. By April I was researching homeschooling, and we've never looked back. Now at 12 he's doing precalculus and loving life ;-)

Oh, when they agreed to the grade skip, the principal, psychologist, etc. told us that they do grade-skips only when the child is working at least 3 or 4 grades ahead, so this wouldn't really solve the problem. Hey, they were right!

~Laura

Unfortunately I think a lot of teachers aren't very mathematically inclined themselves (especially first grade teachers). It is really odd to me that they have special teachers for art and gym, but not math.

But then again, why should she be displeased? Geesh.

[Blessedfamily]

So in other words, learning isn't really the most important goal of schools. :glare:

Wendy,

Yes, it is- learning not to be different (especially if you're gifted), learning to sit still, learning to be quiet, learning to stand in line, learning to defend yourself, ... none of which you need ps for when social situations are all around you to teach those things.

[WendyK]

Wendy,

Yes, it is- learning not to be different (especially if you're gifted), learning to sit still, learning to be quiet, learning to stand in line, learning to defend yourself, ... none of which you need ps for when social situations are all around you to teach those things.

Ah yes. :blink:

[kiana]

Wendy,

Yes, it is- learning not to be different (especially if you're gifted), learning to sit still, learning to be quiet, learning to stand in line, learning to defend yourself, ... none of which you need ps for when social situations are all around you to teach those things.

You forgot "learning not to ask questions" and "learning that the teacher is always right, even when they're not"

Grumble.

[LizzyBee]

My oldest dd was sent to a 1st grade classroom for reading class for an hour each day. Her school was a magnet school that offered electives, and she took at least one ag elective each term.

Her teacher modified assignments to fit students' abilities. If she passed out a worksheet that said to write the first and last letter for each picture, she might tell my dd to write the whole word and another child to just write the first letter. She was discreet about the way she did it so that no-one was put on the spot. If my kids could have had that teacher every year, I would never have started homeschooling. She was one of those people that was born to be a teacher.

[Truscifi]

In our case it was a 4yo (late bday, missed the cutoff by a month) so they wanted to put him in pre-k. When I pointed out that he was already reading and doing 3 column addition and subtraction, and just loved history, I was told that wasn't appropriate to teach a child that age. No exceptions, no adaptation to the needs of the individual child - they didn't even want to meet him to see for themselves where he was! I was aghast. First of all, he taught himself to read (which also started his love of history and has now led into a love of science), and learned addition and subtraction quite easily at the Montessori preschool he was in. And if a child loves to learn about history, why shouldn't he? Or science, or math, or anything else he is interested in?

That was when we decided to homeschool.

[MrsBrooke]

I actually just put my 5yo into K this year because I'm newly pregnant and get incredibly sick with pregnancy.

It has been a frustrating experience. I ask what she does at school and it's the exact same stuff we did 18 mos ago. She's reading, her teacher just tested her this week and called me to inform me that she can indeed read. (Oh, really?!?!) They're letting her go into the 1st grade classroom to pick out two books each day to bring home and read out loud to me. When I ask about advancing her in other areas (she's wicked good at math) they say that her cutting and coloring skills aren't exactly at K level so they don't want to skip her.

Ugh. If I could manage better with this morning sickness, I'd totally yank her...but then she'd just be sitting around watching me be sick. At least this way she gets to ride the school bus! Very exciting for her.

[nova147]

Ugh. If I could manage better with this morning sickness, I'd totally yank her...but then she'd just be sitting around watching me be sick. At least this way she gets to ride the school bus! Very exciting for her.

My 18 month old learned a great lesson watching me be sick. We brought out the potty chair to get her used to the idea a few weeks ago. First, she sat on it. Then she stood over it and made gagging noises. Guess weeks of watching Mommy throw up several times a day convinced her the potty is good for more than one thing!

Seriously, I'm sorry you're not feeling well. And that your daughter isn't have the best school experience. I hope you feel better soon and find whatever education solution is best for your dd.

[Truscifi]

I should probably add to my previous post that the negative experience was at the district level where I was sent after inquiring about subject acceleration. I have since had great experiences at the school level - they have been very accomodating to us as a homeschool family. We use the school library on 'Media Mondays' when the school is open late - for the AR program. We even had school pictures made last year at the school.

[mlgbug]

wow it looks like if we ecer do PS, it would be some jpurney! maybe it has to be the RIGHT school....time to tell :) but i gotta love teaching at home. i mean no bra, hair a mess, cooking, and in a robe, and yep, dd snacking and reading her books to me, or sorting with nubmers, in HER pjs. what more can we ask for. no wonder kids learn better at home.

[LarlaB]

When people ask why we homeschool, I tell them that we're doing the local ps teachers a favor. :D

That made me laugh aloud- I feel the same way about my DD. ;)

[cdgni]

So, your 5 year old is reading....they enter K, but are way beyond the K student....

what happens next?

I know what I did, but it probably won't be doable for most people. I put her in a classroom taught in a language that she didn't know (and I don't speak).

She learned how to concentrate by paying attention to her teacher. She is now the top in her class and sometimes there are still new words for her to learn.

It was the best choice that I could have made for her as it gave her a challenge. (I work, therefore couldn't full time home school.)

Cathy

[JenSMP]

Wow, I am just going to agree with everything that has been said. I'm feeling quite guilty for keeping ds in Pk3, PK4 (twice!!!! due to "social" immaturity), and 3 weeks of KG. I wish I'd realized what was going on earlier. We just pulled ds6 out of private school KG because he was going on his fourth year of learning nothing. I, too, was convinced he needed the "social" time with other children to learn to share and get along in a group. Guess what? He never grew out of his "social" immaturity b/c that wasn't his problem. He was bored to death, and none of the adults in his life changed his situation for 3 years. I feel terrible about that and commend those of you who made better choices for your dc early on.

Once gifted testing was done and we did our research on giftedness and different school options, we came to the conclusion that homeschooling really is our only option if we want ds to learn anything, including how to function when faced with a challenge. We had all the typical behaviors: not paying attention, talking too much, goofing off, crying every time something didn't come easy (usually handwriting or drawing), pefectionism, etc. We are VERY new to hs, but I think it really is our best option at this point.

In our state, the gifted programs in ps aren't up to par, and giftedness in general is just not a priority. I just quit my job to hs ds6, and it's going to hurt financially. But, we are going to do whatever we can to make it work as this is what's best for ds right now. Hopefully one day, school will be in our future, but we'll only go that route if we have no other choice or if it turns out to be the best alternative for ds down the road.

Now I just wish I could convince my mother that hs is the best option. It was such a difficult decision, and it makes it hard when family isn't supportive of a decision you've labored over for a long time. Still praying it's the right one.

Good luck to you, and I wish I could say I had a better experience with traditional school. Some areas and school districts are definitely better than others!

[Melanie]

So, your 5 year old is reading....they enter K, but are way beyond the K student....

what happens next?

My oldest became "teacher's helper" and spent most of his day reading to other students and announcing the time so that everyone could move on to the next activity. :glare: He also went to the second grade classroom for an hour every day. We were working towards a transfer to a Spanish immersion school when we decided to homeschool.

[mchel210]

"They all even out by third grade."

This is why we homeschool.

This is so frustrating to me. My girls are in PS gifted classes and they are making one of them even out now in 3rd grade! I am fighting like crazy with the school. Ughhhhh....They did advanced math last year and now for 3rd grade...they are stating that the rest of the class is on level...so the entire class will be on level (even though my dd is the only one ready to move to the next grade level) I guess it is easier to hold one back then teach one a new subject. That is why they even out. Just one example.

It is very frustrating.

[MBM]

So, your 5 year old is reading....they enter K, but are way beyond the K student....

what happens next?

It depends on the school. A good school will challenge a child who is ready. I'd recommend speaking with the principal, teachers and other parents whose kids go to that school.

[chellelynnr]

My DD (5) learned to read at age 3 and is now reading on a 2nd grade level. I don't think her teacher believed me when I told her how advanced DD is, but now she is assessing the class and is quite amazed. Wanted to say "I told you so", but held back :) I had a moment of panic when they sent the Sept. newsletter stating they were starting a unit on colors, learning about sorting and listing the word wall sight words. (I, like, can, red, etc.)...um, this is preK 3 material, minus the words. I am supplementing with SOTW 1 and WTM science for grade 1, which DD is loving. We kinda took a long break from phonics and need to get back to it, but she is resisting right now. We'll see how it goes.

I haven't a clue of how she is doing socially...need to email teacher on this. DD doesn't seem bored, but she doesn't really talk about the school day other than recess and specials. I do know that if she finishes her work she gets to go to the class library, something she really enjoys. Thankfully, her teacher recognizes her abilities and is nominating her for the GT program. We'll see what all that entails at the end of this month.

[StephanieZ]

Isn't this exactly why many of us hs? For me, the clincher was my visit to our local public K classrooms a few months before she'd have been K age.

. . .

Me, eyeing the stack of 25 identical "K Math" workbooks on a shelf. . . (colors, shapes, counting to 10. . .) "What do kids do who already know the topics in the K Math workbook do?"

Teacher: blank stare.

. . .

Me: "What do kids who already know how to read do?"

Principal: "Not many kids can read when they enter K. Their parents may think they can read. . . but they have just memorized the book(s) and don't comprehend. . . Trained teachers understand how to teach them to comprehend. . . Parents don't know how to do this. . ."

Me: blank stare.

. . .

After 60 minutes of polite chat along these lines and tours of their colorful, clean, rooms, in this state of the art brand new beautiful school, in a county ranked among the very best in the country. . .

It was apparent that my reading, multiplying, factoring, etc dd was not going to be challenged remotely in that school and that if I handed her over, they'd designed a system whereby gifted dc surely would be encouraged/forced to have "evened out by 3rd grade". Not my idea of a responsible education. . .

So, the other option was 20k/yr private school for the gifted. I didn't even visit after learning the tuition, for obvious reasons. (3 kids x 20k/yr = I don't think so!)

I wanted to hs from the start, but checked into the options to satisfy my meddling mom. . .

So, I think with an accelerated child, you either

1) make do. . . don't teach the basics at home so they can have some challenge at school

(i.e., teach them music, foreign language, science, history, etc at home if you wish but try to avoid accelerating the basics. . . you may have to skip K - 1st in ps while they are spending nearly all their time on basic math and reading, but once they get older, you might be OK. . .)

2) teach at home

3) find a great school that will adjust for your child and commit to advocating/monitoring/etc constantly

4) ?????????

For me, it was easy to pick option 2. . .

[WendyK]

Me: "What do kids who already know how to read do?"

Principal: "Not many kids can read when they enter K. Their parents may think they can read. . . but they have just memorized the book(s) and don't comprehend. . . Trained teachers understand how to teach them to comprehend. . . Parents don't know how to do this. . ."

I just blurted out "oh what a freaking load of crap"....

That statement makes me crazy.

[StephanieZ]

I just blurted out "oh what a freaking load of crap"....

That statement makes me crazy.

lol, I totally agree with you! I admit that I was dumbfounded at the principal's premise. . . She was utterly convinced. . . it was so bizarre. . . I mean what could I possibly say to that? I am very rarely short for words, but I was practically speechless at her statement.

She sure made my decision easy, and that conversation totally explained to me in a deep way just why & how all kids "even out by 3rd grade." I had heard that from many people and it made no sense to me. . . until that conversation. It is criminal.

[mchel210]

Well....I have an appointment friday with our principal. Im pretty sure Im also going to tell her that she is "full of crap" as you stated. Ughh. I am sending my husband to the meeting as I know I will loose it. I think he is set to just pull them out as well. Last year we had a very good experience with our 7/8 yo. This year they have decided to go back and reteach all of last year's work. Ughhhhhhh.....So....they also have decided to stop advancing my 6 yo so she doesnt get in the same boat as my 8 yo. I am done.

Ive realized the school is dumbing my children down to the average level.

[WendyK]

Ive realized the school is dumbing my children down to the average level.

As high as average? You are optimistic. ;)

[mchel210]

As high as average? You are optimistic. ;)
Well...as average as the Florida School system goes...Let's see...they are at the bottom of all the states. So I guess average is very low by standards here?

[FeFe]

My (then) 2nd grade dd was reading well above grade level but pretty much on grade level with everything else when she entered 2nd grade at the local public school. (She's was homeschooled prior to this)

Straight A student. Nothing but compliments on her all the way around.

2nd grade ends and she wants to come back home for school. I was a little surprised because as far as I knew she really enjoyed school. But okay, I miss her at home and I'm admittedly a little bored NOT homeschooling.

Crack open some 3rd grade Grammar and Math....she was a little clueless. Had NO CLUE how to use a dictionary or put things in alphabetical order. She has a hard time with subtraction. I'm thinking, "how in the world did you get straight A's?"

She did bring home 2 volumes of Math at the end of the year with nary a page completed. I just assumed they were doing and keeping Math work at school. After all, she had straight A's, right!

Apparently, reading and reading comprehension are the HUGE focus in 2nd grade. Lots of reading groups and time spent on that. Because my dd was so well at that I think she was pushed aside and given busy work most of the day. Not challenged one bit and we basically wasted a YEAR!

Luckily, she catches on to things fairly quick and is doing great at home this year. But obviously I'm a little upset by the ps system she was at last year. "oh, we have to focus, focus, focus on reading so our district will do well on testing. Oh, this girl can read and comprehend that well? Just give her worksheets to do all day while we work with the other children." ggrrrrrr...that's what can happen! And shame on me I guess, to realize that she wasn't doing grade level work.

[Mabelen]

you don't put that child in school for K. You keep him home and homeschool him. When he turns 13yo, he decides he wants to go to high school for sports reasons so you start him in 8th grade. The public school tests him...in class while class is going on then tries to tell you he qualifies for Gifted Algebra (no, duh, he had done Alg 1, Geometry, and was over half-way through Alg 2 at home last year) but does not qualify for Gifted Language Arts even though for 3 years before that he qualified for CTY based on language arts skills.

So, you try reasoning with the principal who brushes you off as a pushy mom. Then contact the superintendent who agrees that one test alone, especially given the circumstances, shouldn't determine his placement so has them give him another test. Child takes said test and lo and behold is as gifted as you said he was (scored way higher on their test than needed to qualify for gifted program).

You are partially happy that child is in highest available classes but know he is going to learn nothing new until you can get him into AP classes the following year and then still maybe not. So, you decide to afterschool said child while he is attending school and remain determined to attempt to talk your other two children into homeschooling until college. :001_smile:


Donna, may I ask what you used for Language Arts with your son in 8th grade? I have my oldest in public school this year and we are having the same issue. I spoke with her teacher and had no satisfactory answers - this from a teacher who claims to have certification in gifted education! I already spoke with the counsellor and they will not change her to a different teacher who I know is giving more challenging work, so I have two choices, #1 Talk to the Principal (I don't know if this will do any good though) or #2 Forget about #1 and do it myself at home. I am more inclined to doing #2 but I need a good solid program because neither my dh nor I are native English speakers.

Another gripe I have is that she is having to take the California English Language Development Test (supposedly for students with a home language other than English for whom there is no previous testing) even though she has lived in English speaking countries all her life and has been schooled in English from Pre-K to 8th grade. Her reading lexile is that of an advanced 10th-12th grade level, and both her Maps Reading and Language Arts scores are above those of the average 8th grade Gifted Spring Norm scores!

[greta_elisif]

Subject acceleration (going into a higher grade class just for reading, for example) is not unheard of either... but it IS hard to come by. And... it's not always the best solution anyway. (Sometimes it's not a "reading" class, but an "English" or "Language Arts" class which includes writing. Often a child who can read grade levels ahead of age cannot necessarily write a three paragraph essay like the kids in that grade may be learning that year.)

It was a terrible solution for me, because in kindergarten, I got 2 grades of acceleration for reading but needed 6, and (obviously) no phonics or daily Letter People show. Also 1 grade of acceleration in math, but the pace was way too slow and I never had to learn any facts, making it through college calculus (without trigonometry or Algebra II—no idea how) still counting sometimes to add and subtract before I realized there was something wrong with that and no wonder I was lost in math, my favorite class.

That first school was a private school. The public school allowed only 1 grade of acceleration, so when switching to it, I had to retake the 4th-grade reading I had passed with perfect grades, as if I had failed it. By high school, I was reading at least a couple grades below grade-level instead of 6 above, because I didn’t understand any of the literature in my regular-level English classes.

I was almost ruined, and I’m working frantically almost to learn Algebra II, intermediate grammar, and beginning formal logic and Latin, (all missing from my school curriculum somehow :mad:) and keep ahead of my daughter in all studies. :001_smile:

The schools are so much further dumbed-down now, and the ones in this town are like prison-zoos (or zoo-prisons?), with gangs, security cameras, police patrolling them, etc., if I sent my daughter to them, it would destroy her mind. Not to mention how I’d be laughed out of the school if I requested a 9th-grade reading class for a 6-year-old. At her current pace, I think she’ll get to 9th-grade reading level in 1st grade (she went from beginning 4th-grade reading to about the end of 5th-grade reading from the beginning of May to the middle of September, about 5 weeks of which we didn’t work on it because our computer was in the shop and the books were saved to it).

[Donna]

Donna, may I ask what you used for Language Arts with your son in 8th grade? I have my oldest in public school this year and we are having the same issue. I spoke with her teacher and had no satisfactory answers

I use Lightning Literature http://hewitthomeschooling.com/book/blight.asp He did American Literature Early to Mid 19th Century this summer. I am happy with the program the public school is using for their gifted language arts so have not felt the need to supplement. It is along the same lines as Lightning Lit and very rigorous.

[brightside]

I tried to find someone to take my son "early" to Kindergarten. He has a December birthday and missed the cutoff, but every one refused. He was able to pass all the signs of "Kindergarten readiness" before he was 3. When he was finally old enough to go to Kindergarten he was reading most picture style books and his own and wanted to read chapter books. When he started reading the Magic Tree House series, they finally agreed to move him to the first grade class for Reading and Math only. It was a disaster, the first grade kids didn't like a "baby" in their class and the Kindergarteners resented the fact he changed classes. The school decided he was too immature to handle it and moved him back. We went through 2 different private school and 1 public school before deciding to bring him home to homeschool. I wish I had done it sooner, he has lost a lot of his spark and passion for learning. I am hoping to rekindle it before he is of age for high school.

[Abkjw01]

So, your 5 year old is reading....they enter K, but are way beyond the K student....

what happens next?

BTDT. The K teacher tells you how far beyond the other kids she is and feels super special that she's differentiating for her. She has her sit in the back of the classroom by herself writing page-long book reports while the other kids do their phonics workbooks. Your 5 y/o feels isolated and alone and this sets the stage for her ongoing dislike of reading and writing anything anymore.

In first grade she's still so ahead of the other kids she gets chatty and fidgety, gets taken out of the accelerated reading pull-out group, and comes out of schol crying every day because she just keeps getting in trouble. The teacher recommends dd to test for the full-time gifted school since she's obligated to, based on her grades - "but she'll never make it in there". Dd is the only child from this school to make it.

2nd grade at the gifted school is nice, but dd is still chatty and fidgety and the teacher insists she has ADHD.

In 3rd grade she outgrows the chattiness and fidgetiness and all the teachers are amazed at the difference medication has made (dd isn't on meds :glare: ). Then by the middle of 3rd grade you notice your once vibrant, exuberant, bubbly, curious, incredibly precocious child has lost all interest in learning, fights you with homework every night, and only likes school because of her friends there. The teacher insists she has ADD-Inattentive. You know this whole thing just isn't working and both of you agree that homeschooling probably is the best thing.

That's what happened to us. Schools teach to the average child. Your child may be bored waiting for the others to catch up, or be told to help the other kids with their work. Accelerated programs are hit or miss and either your child is a good fit or not. You need to stay on top of everything going on and know what is available. Most schools are just not equipped to see accelerated/gifted kids to their potential. I would still give it a shot (if that's what you want to do) because you'll never know if you don't.

[bluemongoose]

I am in your shoes! My DD is 4 and reading way beyond K level. She missed the cutoff for K because she is a Dec baby. They do not allow testing in early. At 2.5yo she was doing PreK level wbks that she asked to buy at Costco. At 3 she completed K curriculum, at 4 she is finishing up 1st grade and will move on to 2nd in Jan. I asked the school back when she was 3 what they do with kids who are far ahead. They looked at me like I had three heads. They asked me what level I thought she would be in. I said 3rd grade if you make her wait until next year...and then told me they have a special ed program. Ummm....good for you, but how exactly does that help our situation???

Dh was gifted and he had all the glorious experiences in PS that people on here shared, he said that we are going to homeschool! So we just continued with what she was working on and she loves it!

[Harmony]

My DS(8) went to private school for 3 years till age 5.
He was self-taught to read at age 2.
The principal did NOTHING nor tried to acknowledge his ability.

So we moved him to public school hoping something would happen.
The principal and the K teacher tried to demeanize his ability in every way possible
stating that NO TEST would be allowed till 3rd grade. (State Edu.Dept. said it was not correct)
His math at K was beyond 4th grade level.

So we pulled him out after one and half month of K in public school.
He thrived, thrived, and thrived ever since we homeschooled.

My DD6, who also was self-taught at age 3, who had a very little school experience
flourished much more rapidly than my DD8.

When she was tested at age 4, her matrix reasoning
skills were below average while her verbal/reading skills were at top 99.9%.
Now after 3 years of homeschooling and customizing her math worksheets,
she is doing 3-4 grade level of math.

I hope my experience gives out the message.

Thanks,
Harmony

[Lizzie in Ma]

If you were me and went into K reading your grandmother's gorgeous copy of Robin Hood by Howard Pyle, your teacher scolds you for showing off, accuses you of lying and takes your book away.
You spend the year dutifully reading Dick and Jane with the rest of the class while the principal allows the teacher to try to bully your mother into not allowing advanced reading because it will "make waves".
It was hell.

[HeatherInWI]

If you're me, the K teacher gives you a different, but still way too easy workbook to work in and you pretty much cool your heels in public school, losing academic learning opportunities and learning social things like "nobody likes a brain" and it's simpler to be lazy and quiet.

If you're a child in the small town I currently live in, you go through the painful "learn one letter a week" process with the rest of the kindergarten class, despite what you already know. You also learn to be lazy and keep your mouth shut.

If you're a child at our local Christian school, your parents are told that you have a problem but that they can rely on the teachers to get your scores "back down where they belong". (Yes, they really told a friend that about her gifted son -- she withdrew him and started homeschooling.)

If you're my sister's child, in a large, advanced city school district, you get put into an all-gifted class for all of your elementary years and actually learn something.

If you're my child, your mom knows that school is not the best place for a gifted child. You stay home, learn at your own speed, and eventually become a happy and thriving teen.

[Mabelen]

I use Lightning Literature http://hewitthomeschooling.com/book/blight.asp He did American Literature Early to Mid 19th Century this summer. I am happy with the program the public school is using for their gifted language arts so have not felt the need to supplement. It is along the same lines as Lightning Lit and very rigorous.

Thank you so much for replying. I will definitely look into Lightning Literature, it sounds good!

[Mabelen]

because my dd was never in public school until this year. Prior to that she was in Montessori for Pre-K and Kindergarten and then in a traditional independent school from 1st to 7th grade. The better fit was the traditional independent school, where she was challenged and gently stretched accross the board.

I have to say that the public school she is attending is overall a good school. It is the L.A. class that is very disappointing and a very poor fit to my daughter's interests and abilities. I think the fact we were new to this area and the district and knew no one to compare notes with and get information from was a distinct disadvantage. Now that we know better we know we could have requested a different teacher with much higher standards and expectations.

[Laura Corin]

They sit in class bored and start to act out at home. The school refuses to differentiate. The gifted coordinator is overwhelmed (she's also the special needs coordinator) and you take them out to home educate.

Then you home educate for eight years, delving into areas which a school would not cover whilst keeping the mainstream subjects ticking over, before putting them back into (small, private, highly academic) school for high school to pursue the International Baccalaureate.

Wish me luck - I've only done pulling out and home education part of this so far. The high school bit comes in 21 months from now.

Laura

[kmacnchs]

I actually asked a 1st grade teacher this because my dd1 (who is not even 3.5) is reading at a 1st-2nd grade level. Keep in mind we are from a small town in the countray!...She said,"Oh, we had a little girl who already knew her ABCs and so she helps other children get to the library and she is the teacher's helper" She said this proudly, like they had found something for this bored little oddball to do. I can only imagine what my child would think, do and feel in 2 years if she went to ps...I'm sure she would read to her classmates, like she does her sister now but who can do that all day for a year?!?!

[talexand]

In our case we have had better luck with the public school than private school. THey would not send my oldest son ahead at the private school and couldn't accomodate him in the classroom. At our public school they sent him ahead a year in reading and math. The highest group is also ahead a level so he is advanced about two years but in the classroom one year ahead. Still, most of the day doesn't fit but we are lucky to be allowed to do half time homeschooling so they only go for half a day.

My daughter started K this year and it is a half day program which is perfect. I was lucky with her that her teacher is quite earnest to keep her reading going. She assessed her and is teaching her in her own reading group at her own level. Math is a different story but I'm not rocking the boat, I just teach her at home. Next year if she is not sent ahead a year in math I will be more insistent. The first grade teacher is the one who sent my older son ahead in math and reading without any advocating on my part so I have reason to believe it will work out.

I know that this school is unusual for accomodating my kids like they do. Unfortunately I'm pretty sure that if I had interviewed the school before K and asked them how they accomodate gifted kids they would have been reluctant to mention any of these possibilities because they are at the discretion of the teacher and not something that they want advertised. I guess they fear the pushy parent whose child is not as advanced as they think, or something. It makes school decisions difficult until you get into the school and see what happens. And even with all the accomodations I will still do the part time homeschooling.

[Renai]

Schools teach to the average child. Your child may be bored waiting for the others to catch up, or be told to help the other kids with their work.

I'm currently student teaching in a first grade ps classroom. There are some students that are "above average" in reading (of course, since they're not getting real phonics, I will probably be tutoring them when they're in the 3rd or 4th grades). They are currently working on the last books that are scheduled for the end of 1st grade. When I asked the teacher what she'll do when they finish that (around January), she said the 2nd grade teacher doesn't want her to move to the 2nd grade materials because that's what she'll be using with them next year :001_huh:. Fortunately (in her mind) she has more advanced guided readers. I'm thinking, what's wrong with real books :confused:?

But, not all schools, teachers, or programs are the same. I've been with some good teachers, and downright awful ones. Although the teacher I'm with truly believes in "balanced literacy" she rocks the boat in many other areas (she hates Investigations math for example and makes it known).

But, schools are limited in what they can do. They can toot differentiation, but how far will they go? Yours is one child, they have 300+ others to work with. The school I'm in is in restructuring (which means they are very low). Having a few high readers is helping them, so they focus on the low level students, which is most of the other students. Even good teachers in good schools can only do so much to help the one among many.

As a homeschooler, I can see how I could differentiate widely in the classroom I'm in, but I can't, because it's not my classroom. (I've learned more as a homeschooler, than...well we won't go there.) And, my word, what will the 2nd grade teacher do with these "advanced" kids when they get to her classroom?? :001_unsure: It's pretty sad, really.

ETA: I should say, though, this teacher does not treat the more advanced students as free teacher's aides. She does work with the children individually on their levels, within the guidelines she's given.

[Spy Car]

We are lucky I suppose. My son started kindergarten this year. He's in a wonderful school.

Yes, he's ahead in reading and really far ahead in math. But he's still learning plenty in school, and having a marvelous time.

He and I keep pushing on doing what we do, and I admire what his teacher brings to the table. So it's a great situation all around.

Bill

[stripe]

She said,"Oh, we had a little girl who already knew her ABCs and so she helps other children get to the library and she is the teacher's helper"
This is why my mother pulled me out of a private school -- she didn't feel like having me do their work while she paid.

That being said, with the right teacher, it could work.

[LittleIzumi]

If you're me, the K teacher gives you a different, but still way too easy workbook to work in and you pretty much cool your heels in public school, losing academic learning opportunities and learning social things like "nobody likes a brain" and it's simpler to be lazy and quiet.


Aaah. Maybe that's why I turned lazy and quiet :tongue_smilie:

[Dinsfamily]

They sit in class bored and start to act out at home. The school refuses to differentiate. The gifted coordinator is overwhelmed (she's also the special needs coordinator) and you take them out to home educate.

Then you home educate for eight years, delving into areas which a school would not cover whilst keeping the mainstream subjects ticking over, before putting them back into (small, private, highly academic) school for high school to pursue the International Baccalaureate.

Wish me luck - I've only done pulling out and home education part of this so far. The high school bit comes in 21 months from now.

Laura

I'm so interested to hear how this plan works out for you. I plan to put my boys into a school (private maybe?) for high school, but I have no idea how it's going to work. Hopefully, you'll have some good BTDT advice for me before too long :D.

[Saille]

Their parents may think they can read. . . but they have just memorized the book(s) and don't comprehend. . . Trained teachers understand how to teach them to comprehend. . .

:angry::angry::angry::angry::angry:

[Maryalice]

So, your 5 year old is reading....they enter K, but are way beyond the K student....

what happens next?

Oh, oh, oh...I can tell you exactly what happens.

I put my 5 yo in a private K. He was already reading and quite bored, but did his best to be a "good little boy" and sit quietly in his seat. He came home almost every day from just a half day of K and had a major (and I mean major melt down). He screamed for no reason, he cried for 30 minutes. This went on for a while and I finally went in to talk to the teacher. She was lovely, saying that he was the best student, always obedient, always patient, even though she knew everything was beneath his ability. He was a "good little boy" until he literally exploded at home. I pulled him out and homeschooled him.

He graduated highschool at 15 years old, graduated summa cum laude from a private college as a dual major, political science/economics and is graduating from law school this year at 22 yo.

[jonnia]

[QUOTE=stripe;1309584]This is why my mother pulled me out of a private school -- she didn't feel like having me do their work while she paid.

I remember spending pretty much my entire 5th grade year doing bulletin board displays for our library, cafeteria and hallways, shelving books in the library and stapling papers in the office. I did learn to use an overhead projector, but not much else that year. It was infinitely better than being bored silly in the classroom, though.

[Colleen in SEVA]

So, your 5 year old is reading....they enter K, but are way beyond the K student....

what happens next?

When I asked the local public school principal this question about B, he told me that ALL K-ers spend the first 9 weeks learning the letters and sounds. Then at the end of October they are given a phonemic awareness test, and the students who score high enough are put into a group to begin putting those sounds together while the rest of the students get another pass through letters and sounds.

I explained that B was currently reading Mr. Popper's Penguins, and he replied "That would be pretty incredible if THAT were true" (at which point I wish I had brought my teaching license with me to SMACK HIM UPSIDE THE HEAD with).

Since K here is full day and includes a nap (B stopped napping at 29 months), I asked if the kids who didn't nap would be able to sit and read instead, and he said no because... are you ready for this???.... allowing my son to read books in school would not be fair to the kids who did not know how to read yet. So I asked what the kids did who didn't nap, and he told me in no uncertain terms "ALL kids this age NEED a nap EVERY day. We then slowly wean them off the nap in the third nine weeks." Ummm... no.

Once kids are in 2nd grade, they are given some sort of test to qualify for the SPARK program. All of the kids who qualify as SPARK kids are put in with the same teacher, but there is no differentiation of instruction. I guess the logic is that if all the good test-takers are put in one class, it gives the other teachers an excuse why they can't pass the NCLB benchmarks? *shrug*

I have dreams of moving to a "good school" neighborhood. :) Until then, we homeschool and I allow my children to read books. *rolleyes*

Also -- there is a big push here to delay starting K. They want you to wait a full year to start K if your child has ANY of the following:
1. a summer birthday (B is Aug 29)
2. small for their size (B is for sure)
3. has never been in a school-like environment like Sunday School or preschool (never a day in either)
4. is a boy (B is, last I checked)

If we followed their advice, B would be in 2nd grade this year (you can see where "following his lead" has gotten us in my signature).

[zaichiki]

I explained that B was currently reading Mr. Popper's Penguins, and he replied "That would be pretty incredible if THAT were true".

Now *there's* someone with limited life experience! Ever wonder how people like that get to be principal???

What did you SAY? (I think I would *obviously* roll my eyes at him, maybe scoff slightly, but I can't imagine a good comeback.)

I could NEVER put any of my children in that school. Seriously.

[Colleen in SEVA]

What did you SAY? (I think I would *obviously* roll my eyes at him, maybe scoff slightly, but I can't imagine a good comeback.).

Nothing witty, unfortunately. At the beginning of the meeting I told him I was debating whether to start B in K or not (leading the principal to think I was going to wait a year, see the part I added to my post above) and didn't mention homeschool.

I also bit my tongue when he told me that he was very proud of their reading program because almost all students were reading c-v-c words by the end of K, and that their school average SOL score was above the district average (didn't impress me -- 3 district schools failed SOLs that year).

Luckily we were already planning to homeschool, but at the time I had a 2yo, a 1yo, and was pregnant, and was having doubts about whether I would be able to meet his needs under the circumstances. That one meeting removed any doubt I had! LOL!

[greta_elisif]

When I asked the local public school principal this question about B, he told me that ALL K-ers spend the first 9 weeks learning the letters and sounds.…I explained that B was currently reading Mr. Popper's Penguins, and he replied "That would be pretty incredible if THAT were true"…Since K here is full day and includes a nap (B stopped napping at 29 months), I asked if the kids who didn't nap would be able to sit and read instead, and he said no because... are you ready for this???.... allowing my son to read books in school would not be fair to the kids who did not know how to read yet. So I asked what the kids did who didn't nap, and he told me in no uncertain terms "ALL kids this age NEED a nap EVERY day."

That is insane! :blink: They are willfully destroying children’s minds.

[Dinsfamily]

Oh, oh, oh...I can tell you exactly what happens.

I put my 5 yo in a private K. He was already reading and quite bored, but did his best to be a "good little boy" and sit quietly in his seat. He came home almost every day from just a half day of K and had a major (and I mean major melt down). He screamed for no reason, he cried for 30 minutes. This went on for a while and I finally went in to talk to the teacher. She was lovely, saying that he was the best student, always obedient, always patient, even though she knew everything was beneath his ability. He was a "good little boy" until he literally exploded at home. I pulled him out and homeschooled him.




I wonder if this is what's going on with the boy I watch afterschool. He is a 1 yr delayed entry k'er (for maturity reasons), but was beyond K academics at 4. He HATES school and we've had more than a few discipline issues since he's started school. When he comes over on the weekends for playdates, he's back to his old self. He does well "making good choices" at school, but is often tired and grumpy after school. Unfortunately, his mom not in a position to quit working and pull him out of school. He has asked him mom if he could do school at home "like D___ does." He thinks it is so cool that my ds gets to do his schoolwork at home. He'll even sit and watch my ds do his work on days we didn't get everything finished.

[spiderwoman]

I can relate to all those posts above. I have read through many of them and have experienced the difficulties with school administrators and teachers. I am a teacher myself and cannot believe how un-public the public schools are. They are supposed to be able to handle all sorts. That is why we homeschool and I am reminded by your posts that the difficulties we face are better than those we would face by being in school.

[Colleen in SEVA]

I am a teacher myself and cannot believe how un-public the public schools are. They are supposed to be able to handle all sorts. That is why we homeschool and I am reminded by your posts that the difficulties we face are better than those we would face by being in school.

This is so true! I taught in a very good public school (which I define as a very high level of parent involvement, almost NO discipline issues, kids who actually WANTED to learn, and they had 98% passing EOG), but there was only minimal differentiation of instruction (kids were grouped between the 4 teachers for math, based on their ranking in the previous year's EOGs, but they all used the same textbook). Everyone learned the same thing, received the same level of challenge, and moved at the same pace.

Now with the No Child Left Behind, it seems like they have just lowered the bar. Certainly there are exceptions, I know -- but even at the "good" school I taught at, they classified one girl in my class as special ed because they were worried she wouldn't pass the EOG and special ed students don't have their scores figured into the class average (teacher bonuses are tied to the class average). This girl was definitely not needing special ed services, but went into middle and high school with that label on her record, and in her self-image.

Would they try to classify my son as special ed because he still writes many of his letters backwards (I know it isn't dyslexia, but I could see their motivation to label him as such).

Sorry for the sidetrack, I'm just thinking out loud. :)

[Happy2BaMom]

I put my 5 yo in a private K. He was already reading and quite bored, but did his best to be a "good little boy" and sit quietly in his seat. He came home almost every day from just a half day of K and had a major (and I mean major melt down). He screamed for no reason, he cried for 30 minutes. This went on for a while and I finally went in to talk to the teacher. She was lovely, saying that he was the best student, always obedient, always patient, even though she knew everything was beneath his ability. He was a "good little boy" until he literally exploded at home. I pulled him out and homeschooled him.


Amen, sister. Very relevant to my current situation.

We put my gifted/advanced son into 1st grade this year due to family/personal reasons. We planned - and told him - that we would resume hsing next year. The local public school is very good (many parents are very happy with it, it is a cheerful place, great test scores, experienced teachers, etc.) I figured, what can go wrong in a year?

Nothing, except my son HATES school. Not dislikes, not disdains. HATES. He also is at the top of his class, is extremely well-behaved (teacher says he is a real leader and one of her best students ever) and - on the surface - things couldn't be better.

We've conferenced with his teacher about his giftedness and his unhappiness...she tells us that she's been teaching 36 years (true) and has had a lot of gifted kids in her class (undoubtedly also true). She's states that gifted kids are just as happy as everyone else and that they usually happily strive to "go the extra mile in class and at home" - the catch is that that extra mile is entirely self-driven. No differentiated instruction. Period. I can't really blame her - she has 28 first graders. I just wish she would acknowledge that his unhappiness at school just MIGHT be due to the fact that he must sit through long blocks of instructional time that explain things the already knows, that he's known for a few years now, rather than it must be something within my son.

Short end to the story: We're juggling schedules and pulling him to hs again after Christmas.