When you're far from family who are in crisis...

[Mrs Mungo]

My MIL just found out she has kidney cancer. She is having surgery at the beginning of April. We just moved here (Hawaii), hubby will be out of the country in April and there's no way we can pick up and go home again (we were just at her home in Arkansas/my family's in Oklahoma for Christmas). But I'd still like to find some way to help her out some. I would look into a meal service but she lives in the sticks. Is there one available through mail-order (she's also diabetic)? What else could I do for her? Any ideas?

[Eliana]

My MIL just found out she has kidney cancer. She is having surgery at the beginning of April. We just moved here (Hawaii), hubby will be out of the country in April and there's no way we can pick up and go home again (we were just at her home in Arkansas/my family's in Oklahoma for Christmas). But I'd still like to find some way to help her out some. I would look into a meal service but she lives in the sticks. Is there one available through mail-order (she's also diabetic)? What else could I do for her? Any ideas?

I know nothing about this service, but they say they deliver anywhere in the US and they have a 'special diets' tab:

http://www.artikochef.com/?s_cid=34&s_kwcid=meal%20service|1773441618&gclid=CJ-714-Eh5ICFSMZawod6DmICg

And here's another:
http://www.homebistro.com/?Source=google_General&gclid=CLePu7SEh5ICFQgmawodPSZbDA

I assume there are more out there as well...


Since my Dad had his heart attack, I call him almost every day (when he was not working at all it was every day, now that he's working a few days a week, it isn't always every day). He lives alone and doesn't have family in the city, but we couldn't come to him, so I call all the time and we just chat about things.

I've sent him some new-to-him books.

The kids have written him letters and drawn pictures for him.

When my grandmother was bedridden she loved being sent puzzle magazines and word search books. (She also loved lots and lots of phone calls.)

Your mil might need or benefit from a home health care worker, either a nurse or a regular care provider.

Here's a site of one such company with branches in Arkansas (I have no personal knowledge of this company - I highly recommend getting references, or perhaps talking with your mil's doctor and getting a referral. Some insurance companies will cover a certain number of visits per year.):

http://www.homewatchcaregivers.com/locations/state.aspx?SeniorCare=Arkansas&source=googleppc&gclid=CKvHvJuGh5ICFRI0awodgmBtCw

And another:

http://www.visitingangels.com/

Does she have friends or neighbors who could be recruited to help out?
Or visit her while she's in the hospital? Perhaps you could contact one of them and get someone to coordinate supportive activities.

Will she need rides arranged for her?

You must all be in shock right now. Hang in there! Your mil will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[Mrs Mungo]

Thank you so much for the helpful suggestions and the thoughts and prayers. I appreciate it.

[Friederike in Persia]

Sorry to hear about your MIL.
My dad got diagnosed with cancer a month ago and we're rather far away as well (he's in Germany, we're in Tajikistan).
As already mentioned, lots of phone calls seem to help both sides.

This is a bit further down the road, but a friend of ours suggested to send flowers each time the patient goes in for chemo, since those are the really tough times. If she prefers books, that might work better.

God (who's still in control!) bless,
Friederike in Persia