Kris
03-08-2008, 10:24 PM
(Lousy thread title and a lot of background stuff, so just skip to the "okay, here's the point" part if you want.)
I'm the one who makes rules around here. Sweetie always supports me, but if he had his way, there would be few rules -- mostly no drugs and stay out of jail.
My son is 15 and I say no "R" rated movies and no "M" rated video games -- and no CDs with parental advisories. He buys his own games and CDs with his allowance and I have to approve them.
So against my better judgment, he got a PS3 for Christmas -- the price tag alone almost sent me into cardiac arrest. One of the consequences that I didn't foresee was "all the good games are rated 'M'!"
Over the past few weeks, this has become more and more of an issue and keeps coming up. It's like dealing with a two year old again with all the "No!" and "NO!" and "What part of NO!!!!!! don't you understand??!!??!!"
I started rethinking my stance when I learned that one of his good friends, whose parents are very strict, allow him to play rated "M" games -- and yes, I verified that. So I started to wonder if my "rule" was unreasonable.
Okay -- here's the point of all of this --
I told him Thursday night, "Okay -- let's see if you've learned anything! You've studied logic and rhetoric and writing, etc., etc. So use your tools, write a persuasive essay and do a presentation to state your case. Be prepared to discuss *thoroughly*."
It's a good thing it wasn't an assignment that involved heavy machinery or even a car, because I'd be road pizza by now. This kid -- my lazy, relaxed, unmotivated, do-just-enough-to-get-by Kid threw himself into this thing like his life depended on it.
He researched the board that rates the games, argued pro and con, presented a beautifully written paper and was able to discuss the issue logically and without a lot of emotional baggage. He even admitted afterward that when he started the project, his thinking didn't extend beyond "but I WANT TO!!!" -- but after doing his research, he was pleased and surprised that he had valid points to discuss beyond instant gratification.
My question isn't about whether he should be allowed to play rated "M" games or not -- the jury (me) is still out on that and I'm thinking about it --
My question is HOW do I present more of his lessons in a way that he really takes them to heart like he did this one? I mean, in two days, he had this thing *nailed* and almost everything else he does just drags on and on.
I already give him a lot of latitude in what he reads -- he chooses from a prescribed list, but it's his choice. I also give him a lot of room when it comes to his science projects, reports and other writing assignments -- if they relate even remotely to what he's studying, that's fine with me because I want him to pursue what interests him and what he wants to learn more about, not a bunch of dry stuff that he couldn't care less about.
He has very few things that he's really passionate and fired up about -- I don't think we can make all of his assignments revolve around video games! LOL!
Thoughts?
I'm the one who makes rules around here. Sweetie always supports me, but if he had his way, there would be few rules -- mostly no drugs and stay out of jail.
My son is 15 and I say no "R" rated movies and no "M" rated video games -- and no CDs with parental advisories. He buys his own games and CDs with his allowance and I have to approve them.
So against my better judgment, he got a PS3 for Christmas -- the price tag alone almost sent me into cardiac arrest. One of the consequences that I didn't foresee was "all the good games are rated 'M'!"
Over the past few weeks, this has become more and more of an issue and keeps coming up. It's like dealing with a two year old again with all the "No!" and "NO!" and "What part of NO!!!!!! don't you understand??!!??!!"
I started rethinking my stance when I learned that one of his good friends, whose parents are very strict, allow him to play rated "M" games -- and yes, I verified that. So I started to wonder if my "rule" was unreasonable.
Okay -- here's the point of all of this --
I told him Thursday night, "Okay -- let's see if you've learned anything! You've studied logic and rhetoric and writing, etc., etc. So use your tools, write a persuasive essay and do a presentation to state your case. Be prepared to discuss *thoroughly*."
It's a good thing it wasn't an assignment that involved heavy machinery or even a car, because I'd be road pizza by now. This kid -- my lazy, relaxed, unmotivated, do-just-enough-to-get-by Kid threw himself into this thing like his life depended on it.
He researched the board that rates the games, argued pro and con, presented a beautifully written paper and was able to discuss the issue logically and without a lot of emotional baggage. He even admitted afterward that when he started the project, his thinking didn't extend beyond "but I WANT TO!!!" -- but after doing his research, he was pleased and surprised that he had valid points to discuss beyond instant gratification.
My question isn't about whether he should be allowed to play rated "M" games or not -- the jury (me) is still out on that and I'm thinking about it --
My question is HOW do I present more of his lessons in a way that he really takes them to heart like he did this one? I mean, in two days, he had this thing *nailed* and almost everything else he does just drags on and on.
I already give him a lot of latitude in what he reads -- he chooses from a prescribed list, but it's his choice. I also give him a lot of room when it comes to his science projects, reports and other writing assignments -- if they relate even remotely to what he's studying, that's fine with me because I want him to pursue what interests him and what he wants to learn more about, not a bunch of dry stuff that he couldn't care less about.
He has very few things that he's really passionate and fired up about -- I don't think we can make all of his assignments revolve around video games! LOL!
Thoughts?