Dd reading S-L-O-W-L-Y - what do I do? (x-post)

[Shelly in MD]

My 14yo dd is reading painfully slowly, for no apparent reason. She does NOT have any sort of reading disability. This is a kid who was reading fluently by age 6, and she used to be a voracious reader, until somewhere around age 10 or 11. At which point she pretty much stopped reading. She does wear glasses, which she needs for minimal correction, but I mention it because she has been to the optometrist within the past year, so I know there is not a physiological issue.

I think she's just being a pain. Really. And I am FRUSTRATED!!

I asked her this morning about "To Kill A Mockingbird," which she asked to read because several friends had read it and one friend in particular we will see next week and she wants to be able to tell her she has read it. She said she is on page 65. She has been reading this book for ~1 week, and she has been spending 45-60 min/day reading it! I asked if she didn't like the book, or if the vocabulary was too challenging, and she replied with this: "Here's the thing: I read slowly because I am doing the summer reading programs. I try not to miss a single syllable, because I don't want to 'cheat'. I even read the page numbers and once I read the entire recommended reading list."

What?!! The page numbers?!! She is 14 years old, going into 9th grade! This is not the first incident of this kind; we've had issues with slow, foot-dragging reading on most school reading for the past 3 years or so.

Any thoughts before the rest of my hair turns gray?!

Shelly

[Jenn in CA]

How about requiring a certain # of pages per day... enough that at her current rate, it might take several hours, but at a reasonable rate it would only take an hour? That's what works for my dawdling reader.

Is her slow summer reading cutting into her chores/other required activities? In which I would say, make sure the required stuff is done first before she's allowed to read, things like that.

It's all about closing in the fences really tight IYKWIM!!

[Garga]

I have a grown friend (she's in her early 30's) who hates to read. I love to read. I asked Mary why she hates to read. She said it's because it takes too long.

After talking it over with her, it turns out that when Mary reads, she reads it as if she were speaking it. She allows each word to take as long as speaking instead of just "reading."

I don't understand why anyone would do this. I told Mary to try just reading it as fast as her eyes go from word to word, but she just won't do it.

So, your daughter isn't the first person to do this. I have no suggestion for you, but I'm not sure she'll change. Maybe there are people who just do this.

[Elizabeth Conley]

I try not to miss a single syllable, because I don't want to 'cheat'. I even read the page numbers and once I ...

I asked Mary (a 30+ YO) why she hates to read. She said it's because it takes too long.

After talking it over with her, it turns out that when Mary reads, she reads it as if she were speaking it. She allows each word to take as long as speaking instead of just "reading."

I'm with the person who suggested a certain number of pages a day. I think that works really well. It doesn't matter if your daughter is dawdling, or if she simply doesn't see a benefit to finishing quickly.

My kids don't mean to dawdle, but because I tend to schedule activities into blocks of time, they tend to figure that there's no benefit to working briskly. This really bites them in the backside come standardized test time. They've completely forgotten how to get'erdone!

If I switch to a specific goal, like X number of pages, then I still run into problems. The problem becomes quality control. This can be addressed by asking a few comprehension problems.

Good luck with this. I've definitely wrestled with similar issues.

Knowing how to read efficiently is important. You're absolutely correct to insist that she pick up the pace. If she doesn't, she may become the sort of adult who rarely reads, and struggles to complete a college course that requires significant reading.

[Mama Bear]

Hmmm... Sounds almost like a compulsive thing to me. Have you noticed anything else with her that might jive with that? Also, if she was fluent at one point, whether or not she's looking compulsive in any other areas or like she's flaunting rules or whatever, it would probably be worth it to delve a little deeper into possible (and relatively benign) neurological possibilities. In other words, there's a pretty good chance that this thing that's making you crazy is developmental in nature, not moral (or at least mostly not moral ;)). I think it's important to keep the lines between the two kinds of issues very clear in order to maximize the opportunities for progress and minimize any further graying on your part (she says, with feeling and empathy). If this is making her in any way nuts or she realizes that it's really not normal but is unable to change it, or she seems convinced that she's normal and doesn't see what the big deal is, even after extensive explanation and examples from you, having some outside help can really assuage the emotional piques for you both and then you get to just move on.

Hugs. (passing the hair dye)

[Kathy in MD]

Until I read the second half of your post, I thought she might still have a vision problem. Not the type that a typical optomertrist or opthamologist would detect. But rather developmental vision problems. This type requires a hour and a half or more to test for and is far more complete than the typical 20-30 min eye exam. And it's often not uncovered until the reading load becomes heavier in Jr high or HS.

But her comment about not wanting to miss a single word sounds more like she might be having trouble determining what's important. My ds came up with some pretty strange definitions of cheating around that age.

I'd try teaching her what cheating is in reading assigned books and maybe add a speed reading course, which won't hurt.

[Shelly in MD]

Thanks for all of the GREAT input; it is very helpful!!

Shelly

[home2333]

Giving her a recap of the different ways to read (How to Read a Book or Francis Bacon's essay) could open her eyes to the need/capacity to switch gears when faced with a page of print.

I think a speed reading course might help, too. Sometimes she'll need to read quickly and to know what to skip or skim in a textbook. It's harder for a slow reader to get through college. But her kind of reading (and probably hearing) each syllable would be entirely appropriate if she were reading a poem for a literature class.

Grace

[unsinkable]

Hmmm... Sounds almost like a compulsive thing to me. Have you noticed anything else with her that might jive with that? Also, if she was fluent at one point, whether or not she's looking compulsive in any other areas or like she's flaunting rules or whatever, it would probably be worth it to delve a little deeper into possible (and relatively benign) neurological possibilities. In other words, there's a pretty good chance that this thing that's making you crazy is developmental in nature, not moral (or at least mostly not moral ;)). I think it's important to keep the lines between the two kinds of issues very clear in order to maximize the opportunities for progress and minimize any further graying on your part (she says, with feeling and empathy). If this is making her in any way nuts or she realizes that it's really not normal but is unable to change it, or she seems convinced that she's normal and doesn't see what the big deal is, even after extensive explanation and examples from you, having some outside help can really assuage the emotional piques for you both and then you get to just move on.

Hugs. (passing the hair dye)

I was thinking that, too. Good advice, Mamabear!

[unsinkable]

I have a grown friend (she's in her early 30's) who hates to read. I love to read. I asked Mary why she hates to read. She said it's because it takes too long.

After talking it over with her, it turns out that when Mary reads, she reads it as if she were speaking it. She allows each word to take as long as speaking instead of just "reading."

I don't understand why anyone would do this. I told Mary to try just reading it as fast as her eyes go from word to word, but she just won't do it.

So, your daughter isn't the first person to do this. I have no suggestion for you, but I'm not sure she'll change. Maybe there are people who just do this.

This is sad. It is like the solution is right in front of her & she won't take it.

[Susan C.]

My 14yo dd is reading painfully slowly, for no apparent reason. She does NOT have any sort of reading disability. This is a kid who was reading fluently by age 6, and she used to be a voracious reader, until somewhere around age 10 or 11. At which point she pretty much stopped reading. She does wear glasses, which she needs for minimal correction, but I mention it because she has been to the optometrist within the past year, so I know there is not a physiological issue.

I think she's just being a pain. Really. And I am FRUSTRATED!!

I asked her this morning about "To Kill A Mockingbird," which she asked to read because several friends had read it and one friend in particular we will see next week and she wants to be able to tell her she has read it. She said she is on page 65. She has been reading this book for ~1 week, and she has been spending 45-60 min/day reading it! I asked if she didn't like the book, or if the vocabulary was too challenging, and she replied with this: "Here's the thing: I read slowly because I am doing the summer reading programs. I try not to miss a single syllable, because I don't want to 'cheat'. I even read the page numbers and once I read the entire recommended reading list."

What?!! The page numbers?!! She is 14 years old, going into 9th grade! This is not the first incident of this kind; we've had issues with slow, foot-dragging reading on most school reading for the past 3 years or so.

Any thoughts before the rest of my hair turns gray?!

Shelly

Yes, my dd will probably bring on the gray for me as well :)

My dd has always read slowly. The only thing that gets her moving is a book that she can't wait to get to the end on. Twilight was like that (I know not very classical, but her speed did come up reading all three in a summer). To Kill a Mockingbird is a great book, but definitely not one to build speed on, there is too much to catch in it!

And, my dd wears glasses as well, the optometrist got her prescription wrong the first time (it was too strong), may need a double check. They are used to making reading glasses too strong for old people whose eyes are going!! Make him check the prescription with her with a book in her lap, not six inches from her face!

[tammyinar]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Garga http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forums/images/buttons/viewpost.gif (http://www.welltrainedmind.com/forums/showthread.php?p=1032458#post1032458)
I have a grown friend (she's in her early 30's) who hates to read. I love to read. I asked Mary why she hates to read. She said it's because it takes too long.

After talking it over with her, it turns out that when Mary reads, she reads it as if she were speaking it. She allows each word to take as long as speaking instead of just "reading."

She might be an auditory learner. Maybe her comprehension is much better when she 'hears' it in her head rather than just seeing it. Hmmmm...

[Myra]

Back in my public school teaching days...I had a few children that read word-to-word with each word in isolation. Now...although this was grade five...I made flashcards (now I guess I would have used power points, time changes!!) of prepositional phrases that get read together in one (like "under the bed" would be read as a quick phrase rather than "under" pause "the" pause "bed") and clauses that get read as one phrase, etc. We would practice reading the cards outloud then would find easy readers and analyze what should be read "together" as a phase & try it out. This really helped the kids with fluency, comprehension, and speed.

So....this could actually be a reading area that needs professional help remediating. Speech therapists are really good at detecting weaknesses like this.

I always think that one should always first try "regular" ways of fixing the problem like you have been doing - you know, "Mom's Common Sense" procdures. But if that doesn't work, I feel it's good to rule out any medical (glasses, etc.) . Then rule out any other possiblities such as auditory learning, word-by-word reading vs. phrase reading, dysgraphia, etc using speech therapists, etc.

Or it could just be a teenage phase! Ha!

Enough musing,

Myra

[Ruth in Canada]

The comment about reading page numbers also made me wonder about OCD. OCD can really slow down the reading if one feels compelled to reread and reread. If you think this might be the problem, the book "Talking Back to OCD" is a great place to start. Some of the information available in books and on-line is old--look for the newer information that recognizes the success of cognitive-behavioral therapy in treating OCD.

[Julie in MN]

This is a kid who was reading fluently by age 6, and she used to be a voracious reader, until somewhere around age 10 or 11.

Shelly,
I have a child with similar issues and I'll share some things I've learned along the way. I certainly have not succeeded in much with her, but I have learned how to balance my standards with an appreciation of who she is. Of course each of our children is unique, and some or all of these may not relate to your situation...

1. I've found that when my dd learns something, she learns it thoroughly and remembers it forever. That is why everything stopped when she hit high school level reading and could not go fast enough to learn all of it thoroughly.

2. Yes, there is an element of inability to discern the important from the unimportant. There is also some obsession with detail. However, the reverse can be said of other students at times. For my dd, I see it as more of a lack of balance in other parts of her personality to compensate for these tendencies. She never had a driving force to do other fun stuff, or whatever else motivates the rest of us to just move on even when we really aren't happy with how well we understand something.

3. Unfortunately our system today is based on the idea that students will quickly absorb a lot of information, demonstrate their ability to do so by testing well, and then likely forget it. There are reasons why that system works for us. However, I do not see my dd's style as "worse" than the typical style in our society. Instead, the problem lies with the fact that her style has not merged with our culture (rather than her style itself being a problem). That could be looked at as a strength or a weakness. I've always said that she'd be an excellent cell biologist, watching cells divide under a microscope & noticing each little thing. But how to get her through our current system of education... now that's the issue.

4. We did speed reading through an outside source, as well as going thru a book in our home. The ideas behind speed reading were so close to what she needed to hear -- you actually remember more if you read faster! But unfortunately, she was not able to change herself this drastically.

5. We did have her tested through the public schools and again, she looked "so close" to having a learning disability that they just couldn't figure out why she tested so well. I knew the answer -- their tests all allowed unlimited time -- so she looked like a genius!

6. For my dd as well as a friend I've known since junior high who reads slowly, their lives have progressed along okay. Reading slowly means they have less free time and progress takes much longer, but neither of them seems to mind enough to want to change themselves so completely.

7. Some things such as driving and childcare have required me to intervene, because she can know a limited amount of information extremely well while not knowing all the rest.


If you're like me, you'll want to try everything, but if nothing changes her, then I hope you'll find comfort in the fact that you aren't the only parent pulling out her hair.
Julie

[Susan C.]

6. For my dd as well as a friend I've known since junior high who reads slowly, their lives have progressed along okay. Reading slowly means they have less free time and progress takes much longer, but neither of them seems to mind enough to want to change themselves so completely.



And, things went well for ds until college, because I gave him all the time he said he needed. But, in college they don't give enough time for that (actually in regular school they don't either), and it has been stressful watching that.... DD is in 10th grade, I'm really trying to speed her up because she wants to go to college as well. DS bought a speed reading course. Stay tuned... I guess if they were to never speed up, they may have been labeled LD in school for just that even though both of them are great students. If it comes to them not being able to keep up, they can just take college slower.